It was a typical Thursday evening. I had just gotten home from my after-school program run and was just putting my feet up and getting ready to eat dinner (thank you microwave dinners deluxe)when a phone call interrupted my, one time a week, quiet evening at home.
"Ms. Bus Driver, its an emergency, can you help?"
Amazing how one phone call can cause so much havoc in one evening. Not really knowing what I was about to get myself into, I immediately said, "Yes, what do you need me to do?"
"Go to Transit, get a bus with a lift, and go out to Nearby Town, and help evacuate the nursing home. There is a fire. Make sure you call Mr. Bossman when you get to Transit."
By the word "fire", the adrenaline was pumping, and I had already put my shoes on and was on the way down the stairs. The call came in at 6:51 pm. I was at Transit and on a bus by 6:54 pm. I was entering Nearby Town following the ambulances with lights and sirens by 7:07 pm. By 7:09, I was at the nursing home.
The smoke was thick. It felt like a hot August night and the road was blocked off. The fire reached within 30 feet of the nursing home. We were against a wall of smoke racing against time to get the residents to safety. It was chaos. Organized chaos, but chaos. Police were redirecting traffic, roads were closed, trains were stopped. The fire had jumped the 4 lane highway in several places. The county had come to a standstill. Reports flew in, 1000 acres burned, then 2000, then 5000, then 7000+. Damage is unknown. Speculation begins: Was it a careless brush fire, Was it someone burning trash, Was it a controlled burn out of control?
WHOP WHOP WHOP WHOP WHOP The helicopter soars overhead dropping water on hot spots where the trucks can't reach. Homes are in danger, some already burning. People are being evacuated to nearby churches, schools, towns. Fire departments from all over are battling the blaze. Emotions are running high and the intensity is heart pounding.
School buses, Transit buses, and Ambulances are piled into the parking lot at the nursing home. I load up two people in wheelchairs, secure them and go to make my way over to the safety shelter. I return again in the hopes of helping to transport supplies, or other needed items or other people who needed transport. I think it takes about 40-50 minutes to evacuate everyone. Ambulances are making several return trips for bed bound residents. Over at the evacuation shelter, people are swarming, nurses are working to make sure everyone is safe and the smell of smoke hangs in the air. The nursing home becomes a ghost town.
Did I just help evacuate a nursing home?
Wow.
The Bus Driver
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
What are we going to do if it rains?
More importantly, this should be titled, "Why should parents be home when their children get home from school?" A whole issue brewed between a fellow bus driver and a parent earlier this week. Since the child lives down near the end of a dead-end dirt road, the bus cannot go down to the end of the road and risk getting stuck in mud or sand in an attempt to turn around and come out. Instead, we drop the child off at the corner, and she has to walk a measly 2 and a half bus lengths (about 100 feet) to her driveway. We have never gone down to the end of that road and have always dropped off at the corner. There is simply no place for a 40 foot long vehicle to turn around at the end.
Because the child is in 3rd grade, we ask that the parent be visible to the bus driver before the driver will let the child off. This means the parent needs to either be at the end of the driveway or at the actual stop. The alternative to the parent being at the stop is to have the parent sign a letter stating that someone will be home to receive the child every day. A majority of the time, parents seem to feel "inconvenienced" by their children. How dare we ask them to interrupt whatever they're doing, in order to be home for their child?
So, the parent found themselves up at the bus shop in my boss' office. The mother was demanding we make an exception for her child. I only happen to know about this child because while the bus driver was out one afternoon, the child began to ride the bus. I stopped at the end of the road (closest to the paved highway road) and the child said "I live all the way down this road." I told her not to worry, but that I had a few other stops before her designated stop. When I stopped to let her off at the corner closest to her house, the child claimed I missed her house. So, I kept her on the bus until the end of the route, letting her know I'd go back down the road. Maybe I got the numbers wrong, maybe I misread the bus pass, maybe I was at fault. We traveled down the road, and she informed me that her house was 3-4 houses past the corner where I originally told her to get off the bus, down towards the dead end part of the road. I informed her that this would be her stop and that she would need to walk to and from this point. She seemed to accept it.
The mother was in my boss' office when I overheard the conversation. The mother was not understanding why we couldn't go to the end of the road and drop her child off at her driveway. I peeked my head in and interjected that I had been the one to drop the child off on the first day, and the mother accused me of trying to MAKE her child get off the bus at the "Highway". I informed her that I told her daughter that I would be going down that road, and explained that I let her off at the corner closest to the house. After this, I had to get going, and I over heard her ask my boss. "What are ya'll gonna do if it rains?"
I had to stifle laughter and bite my tongue as my answer whispered through my lips. "Buy an umbrella and a poncho."
Washed Away,
The Bus Driver
Because the child is in 3rd grade, we ask that the parent be visible to the bus driver before the driver will let the child off. This means the parent needs to either be at the end of the driveway or at the actual stop. The alternative to the parent being at the stop is to have the parent sign a letter stating that someone will be home to receive the child every day. A majority of the time, parents seem to feel "inconvenienced" by their children. How dare we ask them to interrupt whatever they're doing, in order to be home for their child?
So, the parent found themselves up at the bus shop in my boss' office. The mother was demanding we make an exception for her child. I only happen to know about this child because while the bus driver was out one afternoon, the child began to ride the bus. I stopped at the end of the road (closest to the paved highway road) and the child said "I live all the way down this road." I told her not to worry, but that I had a few other stops before her designated stop. When I stopped to let her off at the corner closest to her house, the child claimed I missed her house. So, I kept her on the bus until the end of the route, letting her know I'd go back down the road. Maybe I got the numbers wrong, maybe I misread the bus pass, maybe I was at fault. We traveled down the road, and she informed me that her house was 3-4 houses past the corner where I originally told her to get off the bus, down towards the dead end part of the road. I informed her that this would be her stop and that she would need to walk to and from this point. She seemed to accept it.
The mother was in my boss' office when I overheard the conversation. The mother was not understanding why we couldn't go to the end of the road and drop her child off at her driveway. I peeked my head in and interjected that I had been the one to drop the child off on the first day, and the mother accused me of trying to MAKE her child get off the bus at the "Highway". I informed her that I told her daughter that I would be going down that road, and explained that I let her off at the corner closest to the house. After this, I had to get going, and I over heard her ask my boss. "What are ya'll gonna do if it rains?"
I had to stifle laughter and bite my tongue as my answer whispered through my lips. "Buy an umbrella and a poncho."
Washed Away,
The Bus Driver
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Pollen Did It
The little boy who lives across the parking lot from me is obsessed with the transit bus that I drive regularly. He can't help it, he's 4. He usually requests a "ride around the parking lot" in the bus. Occasionally, I let him. I also let him operate the door, and he always asks questions about the buttons and knobs on the panel at the front of the bus. He's absolutely adorable. Today, he and his mother were out in the parking lot having some "outside" time and I pull in on the bus. He runs to the door after I get parked and informs me of some very important news.
Busboy: Ms. Bus Driver, guess what!?
Me: What Busboy?
Busboy (very authoritatively): SomeBODY put stuff all over our car this morning, but I washed it off all by myself!
Me: Oh really? Who would do such a thing?
Busboy (knowingly): "Pollen" did it!
I must set out to find this "Pollen" and make sure he is brought to justice!
Giggling,
The Bus Driver
Busboy: Ms. Bus Driver, guess what!?
Me: What Busboy?
Busboy (very authoritatively): SomeBODY put stuff all over our car this morning, but I washed it off all by myself!
Me: Oh really? Who would do such a thing?
Busboy (knowingly): "Pollen" did it!
I must set out to find this "Pollen" and make sure he is brought to justice!
Giggling,
The Bus Driver
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Overheard - BonBons
Most of the time, the morning routes are uneventful. Kids are just waking up, are still sleepy, and are often quieter in the morning. Not the case with BonBon Girl. BonBon Girl is in everyone's business. I don't think that child sleeps at night, she always seems so wired up. She acts out enough that she has earned herself a permanent front seat. Unfortunately we still have to remind her to sit down and turn around. She tends to tell the other kids what to do, and again, we have to remind her to mind her own business several times during the route.
Anyhow, the following exchange happened between BonBon Girl and another child on the bus this morning:
BonBon Girl: When people get pregnant, they eat BonBons!
Other Child: Ew....
BonBon Girl: What? Its just chocolate! They eat Twinkies too!
Somehow, I really don't want to know what started that conversation!
Nibbling Chocolate(and NOT pregnant)!
The Bus Driver
Anyhow, the following exchange happened between BonBon Girl and another child on the bus this morning:
BonBon Girl: When people get pregnant, they eat BonBons!
Other Child: Ew....
BonBon Girl: What? Its just chocolate! They eat Twinkies too!
Somehow, I really don't want to know what started that conversation!
Nibbling Chocolate(and NOT pregnant)!
The Bus Driver
Monday, February 21, 2011
Good Morning or Good Afternoon?
Ms. Elderly is back with a third installment. To fully appreciate her, you need to read Part 1 and Part 2.
I recently picked up Ms. Elderly and Mr. Stroke for BINGO. They go play bingo at a local church twice a month. It's this huge event and they go play anyways even if they don't win anything. I pick up Ms. Elderly first and head over to Mr. Stroke's house. Mr. Stroke recently had a haircut. I mentioned it, and Ms. Elderly pipes up with, "I like him better with longer hair, its more curly and fits him better." Nothing like saying whats exactly on your mind huh?
I let the lift down to get Mr. Stroke and his powerchair on the bus, and I hear the following exchange between the two as I'm raising the lift.
Ms. Elderly: Good MORNING Mr. Stroke!
Mr. Stroke: Good AFTERNOON Ms. Elderly!
Ms. Elderly: It's not afternoon, its MORNING.
Mr. Stroke: I beg to differ it is AFTERNOON, its after 12.
Keep in mind, this happened at about 12:30 NOON, BINGO doesn't start till after 1:30 pm and both are going early to get good "seats" for the activity. In fact, they were the first there. I climb back into the bus in time to hear Ms. Elderly retort back with, "I guess it IS afternoon then."
When I returned to pick them up around 5 pm, I mentioned that I was surprised that Ms. Crazy - another regular transit rider - wasn't on the bus. Ms. Elderly had something to say about that as well.
Ms. Elderly: Well Ms. Crazy gets a ride from Mr. GuyDownTheRoad. He lives down the road from her about 3 miles. She has ridden with him a couple times, so I guess they're an Item. Well, thats what I think anyways!
Forgive me if I dissolved into fits of laughter at this revelation. If that wasn't enough, this took the icing on the cake.
Ms. Elderly: I brought home two pieces of cake. We had cake for dessert at BINGO. I didn't win anything this time, but I did bring home the cake. No icing though, thats bad for diabetics like me. I hope I can get the cake inside before my daughter finds out I have it hidden in my walker!
Licking the Icing,
The Bus Driver
I recently picked up Ms. Elderly and Mr. Stroke for BINGO. They go play bingo at a local church twice a month. It's this huge event and they go play anyways even if they don't win anything. I pick up Ms. Elderly first and head over to Mr. Stroke's house. Mr. Stroke recently had a haircut. I mentioned it, and Ms. Elderly pipes up with, "I like him better with longer hair, its more curly and fits him better." Nothing like saying whats exactly on your mind huh?
I let the lift down to get Mr. Stroke and his powerchair on the bus, and I hear the following exchange between the two as I'm raising the lift.
Ms. Elderly: Good MORNING Mr. Stroke!
Mr. Stroke: Good AFTERNOON Ms. Elderly!
Ms. Elderly: It's not afternoon, its MORNING.
Mr. Stroke: I beg to differ it is AFTERNOON, its after 12.
Keep in mind, this happened at about 12:30 NOON, BINGO doesn't start till after 1:30 pm and both are going early to get good "seats" for the activity. In fact, they were the first there. I climb back into the bus in time to hear Ms. Elderly retort back with, "I guess it IS afternoon then."
When I returned to pick them up around 5 pm, I mentioned that I was surprised that Ms. Crazy - another regular transit rider - wasn't on the bus. Ms. Elderly had something to say about that as well.
Ms. Elderly: Well Ms. Crazy gets a ride from Mr. GuyDownTheRoad. He lives down the road from her about 3 miles. She has ridden with him a couple times, so I guess they're an Item. Well, thats what I think anyways!
Forgive me if I dissolved into fits of laughter at this revelation. If that wasn't enough, this took the icing on the cake.
Ms. Elderly: I brought home two pieces of cake. We had cake for dessert at BINGO. I didn't win anything this time, but I did bring home the cake. No icing though, thats bad for diabetics like me. I hope I can get the cake inside before my daughter finds out I have it hidden in my walker!
Licking the Icing,
The Bus Driver
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Messing With Bill Collectors
Okay, so this post has nothing to do with driving a bus, but it was too good not to share.
I admit it, i'm not the best when it comes to paying my bills on time, all the time. I do get to most of them by at least the 2nd or even 3rd notice. Not really, but occasionally, I do have bills that slip my mind. These are usually unpaid balances on a medical service that I received ONCE way back when. Normally, I'll get a bill like that in the mail, think nothing of it, then when it hits second notice, will send out the money because it slipped my mind the first time.
Two years ago in December 2008, I had a Sinus CT scan done. I thought nothing of the visit since I did not have a co-pay. My insurance covered it all, or so I thought. December 2010, I get this random phone call from an 888 number stating I had a message waiting. So I called back and a lady answers with, "Hello?" No indication that it was a company she worked for, no indication that it was a creditor looking to rectify a bill, NOTHING.
I explain my random phone call from the number, and she places me on hold with a rude, "Hold on." Then she comes back and says very snippingly, "You have an unpaid bill of $6.86 from *Radiology* for a CT scan back in 2008, you need to pay it now." It caught me off guard and being that it was right around the holidays, my first thought was that it was a scammer trying to get my information. My second thought was that if I hadn't seen a bill initially (back in 2008/2009), then I have no idea what she was referring to. Keep in mind, she answered the phone very unprofessionally, so I was right to be cautious. I told her, "Send me a paper bill, because I need to double check with my insurance that I do owe this amount. I also don't feel comfortable with giving my credit card information over the phone." She retorted with, "We wouldn't take your information anyways, there would be a 10 dollar charge to have it processed if we did."
So I hung up and waited. Two weeks later, a bill did appear in my mailbox. I had gone through my insurance claims and found the one claim they were referring to. Again, at this point I had no recollection of receiving a bill for the services at the time of the service. I put it on my "to do" clipboard and ignored it, thinking still that it might be a scam. I got another call from the same 888 number. By this time I was getting irate because they answered the phone in the same snippy tone. All this was over a bill for something that SHOULD have been simply written off. We're arguing over 6 dollars and 86 cents here.
I called the *Radiology* place directly and, after reaffirming they DID send a bill, I got told, "You're not the only one who owes $6.86." Now you pissed me off and insulted me. I had half a mind to get the money in small change, tape it to the envelope in duct tape and send it off duct taped like Fort Knox. I ended up getting a money order instead, costing me 45 cents. I also had to provide my own stamp for THEIR return envelope. So, I did the next best thing. I typed up an itemized Invoice, billing them for the cost of the stamp and for the cost of the money order. A whopping 89 cents. Looking back, I should have included the cost of the paper too. Hopefully, I pissed off the person who opened it, saw my bill to them and thought, "This is Stupid!"
My sentiments EXACTLY.
The Bus Driver
I admit it, i'm not the best when it comes to paying my bills on time, all the time. I do get to most of them by at least the 2nd or even 3rd notice. Not really, but occasionally, I do have bills that slip my mind. These are usually unpaid balances on a medical service that I received ONCE way back when. Normally, I'll get a bill like that in the mail, think nothing of it, then when it hits second notice, will send out the money because it slipped my mind the first time.
Two years ago in December 2008, I had a Sinus CT scan done. I thought nothing of the visit since I did not have a co-pay. My insurance covered it all, or so I thought. December 2010, I get this random phone call from an 888 number stating I had a message waiting. So I called back and a lady answers with, "Hello?" No indication that it was a company she worked for, no indication that it was a creditor looking to rectify a bill, NOTHING.
I explain my random phone call from the number, and she places me on hold with a rude, "Hold on." Then she comes back and says very snippingly, "You have an unpaid bill of $6.86 from *Radiology* for a CT scan back in 2008, you need to pay it now." It caught me off guard and being that it was right around the holidays, my first thought was that it was a scammer trying to get my information. My second thought was that if I hadn't seen a bill initially (back in 2008/2009), then I have no idea what she was referring to. Keep in mind, she answered the phone very unprofessionally, so I was right to be cautious. I told her, "Send me a paper bill, because I need to double check with my insurance that I do owe this amount. I also don't feel comfortable with giving my credit card information over the phone." She retorted with, "We wouldn't take your information anyways, there would be a 10 dollar charge to have it processed if we did."
So I hung up and waited. Two weeks later, a bill did appear in my mailbox. I had gone through my insurance claims and found the one claim they were referring to. Again, at this point I had no recollection of receiving a bill for the services at the time of the service. I put it on my "to do" clipboard and ignored it, thinking still that it might be a scam. I got another call from the same 888 number. By this time I was getting irate because they answered the phone in the same snippy tone. All this was over a bill for something that SHOULD have been simply written off. We're arguing over 6 dollars and 86 cents here.
I called the *Radiology* place directly and, after reaffirming they DID send a bill, I got told, "You're not the only one who owes $6.86." Now you pissed me off and insulted me. I had half a mind to get the money in small change, tape it to the envelope in duct tape and send it off duct taped like Fort Knox. I ended up getting a money order instead, costing me 45 cents. I also had to provide my own stamp for THEIR return envelope. So, I did the next best thing. I typed up an itemized Invoice, billing them for the cost of the stamp and for the cost of the money order. A whopping 89 cents. Looking back, I should have included the cost of the paper too. Hopefully, I pissed off the person who opened it, saw my bill to them and thought, "This is Stupid!"
My sentiments EXACTLY.
The Bus Driver
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Two Pukers, a Claustrophobic, a Fight and the Cops.
All of the above happened in the span of 5 hours on one field trip, towards the end of a Very. Long. Day.
That fateful Friday, I had stupidly accepted two field trips on the same day. Now let me preface that by saying, I've done this before with no problems, but it DOES make for a very long day in a big yellow limo. What complicated the day was that I had to complete these field trips IN ADDITION to my regular driving job. So my day consisted of the regular Morning Route, Field Trip number 1, Afternoon Route, and finally Field Trip number 2. Somewhere in the ensuing chaos, I had to schedule time to eat and go to the bathroom. This meant I leave the house at about 6 am, and don't get home until about 11 pm.
The first part of the day went off without a hitch. I drove a route in the morning, then transported a group of very well behaved middle school students to the bowling alley and then over to the mall food court for lunch. Naturally, no kid wanted the lunch packed by the school, so I managed to score about 12 free lunches in the end.
We make it back to town on time for me to drop in at home, drop the lunches off, stick them in the fridge, go to the bathroom and hit the ground running again. The afternoon route has no major problems. I'm hoping for poor weather so that my night field trip is cancelled, but no such luck.
The second field trip of the day is to a nearby blueberry field where some random guy has a telescope set up to view the various items in space. The field trip was designated for 6th grade middle school science students. Two of us drove for the trip. The school trip coordinator, Mr. Floozy, separated the students into two groups, boys and girls. I had 60+ boys on my bus, the other driver had the 70+ girls. I also had another male teacher on my bus named Mr. Military. The girls bus had Ms. Principal, and Ms. Science.
The drive only took 10 minutes, but Mr. Floozy kept trying to tell me how to drive. "Slow down, theres a car there! Don't run into that car!". Once we got to the turn off to the field, he insisted on telling me that the road was "hidden" even though there is a BIG YELLOW ROAD SIGN pointing out where the entrance is and a STREET SIGN also designating the road. I see it, ignore him and turn properly. We maneuver into this field on paths meant for a 4 wheeler or smaller tractor. Mr. Floozy then informs me that I have to make a very tight, almost u-turn, with this bus, on unstable ground in the field. I radio the other driver to hang back a bit to watch what I do, then copy me. We turn in the bus and Mr. Floozy has a panic attack because the other bus ISN'T moving! UM NEWS FLASH - I TOLD her NOT to MOVE! He then tells me no less than THREE times that the other bus MUST park BEHIND me... NOT beside, BEHIND. *face palm*
By this time, the kids notice the TWO port-a-potties in the field and the Itty Bitty Teeny Bladder Committee (IBTBC) strikes about 3 quarters of my packed bus. Naturally Mr. Floozy decides to plow ahead letting me know that the girls will go first with the activity, then the boys. But until then, the kids are to remain ON the bus. Yep. 60 BOYS, packed 3 to a seat on a bus, in the middle of a blueberry field in the middle of nowhere. THIS is going to end well!
By this time, the IBTBC is just aching to get off the bus, Mr. Floozy steps off and takes Mr. Military with him, leaving ME in charge of these rowdy boys. I had assumed that Mr. Military would be back to check in on the bus, NO LUCK. Over the course of three hours, the kids were herded on and off the buses, in freezing cold weather to look at the stars, constellations, moon, and planets visible in the night sky. A majority of this time, I was ALONE in my supervision of the boys on my bus. The girls were thankfully supervised by Ms. Principal. Towards the end of the evening, getting on and off the bus got to some of the girls and they started to feel ill and claustrophobic. Finally Mr. Floozy wrapped up the exercise and informed me that we were taking them to a nearby Dairy Queen for Ice Cream and Soda.
Let me get this straight.... you want to travel to a nearby Dairy Queen to pump 130+ kids full of sugar, and expect to keep ORDER?! ARE YOU INSANE?!?!?!
Mr. Floozy gives me directions to the DQ and complains when I go in the wrong entrance. I bit my tongue and prayed that the words Shut The F--- Up would not exit my mouth at the wrong time. Again, the girls went first at the Dairy Queen, leaving the boys to watch in dismay as they flooded the restaurant and took forever. Mr. Floozy disappeared off the bus leaving me with Mr. Military. We were finally down to the last half of the boys waiting, when Mr. Military stepped off the bus momentarily to remind the girls that there were boys waiting.
One of the boys took this exact moment to punch another boy directly in the nose. I happened to be looking up in my mirror and saw it. I stopped it, but not before the boy who got punched tried to fight back. Nose Boy (the one who got punched) came up to me with a bloody nose. I got him to calm enough to tell me who punched him. I called Puncher Boy to the front to have him readily admit that he punched the other boy. Mr. Military returned to the bus and handled the situation, called the principal of the school (who was not happy) and we returned to town. Nose Boy's mom finds out her son was in a fight and goes apeshit. She calls the cops then comes up to me and asks me if we have video on the bus. I reply calmly yes, we do, and that I would have it pulled. At this point, I had unloaded, was ready to go home, and the cops show up. Eventually I DID get to go home, but not before I was completely exhausted and spent.
NEVER AGAIN will I do a field trip for Mr. Floozy.
Floozy'd Out!
The Bus Driver.
That fateful Friday, I had stupidly accepted two field trips on the same day. Now let me preface that by saying, I've done this before with no problems, but it DOES make for a very long day in a big yellow limo. What complicated the day was that I had to complete these field trips IN ADDITION to my regular driving job. So my day consisted of the regular Morning Route, Field Trip number 1, Afternoon Route, and finally Field Trip number 2. Somewhere in the ensuing chaos, I had to schedule time to eat and go to the bathroom. This meant I leave the house at about 6 am, and don't get home until about 11 pm.
The first part of the day went off without a hitch. I drove a route in the morning, then transported a group of very well behaved middle school students to the bowling alley and then over to the mall food court for lunch. Naturally, no kid wanted the lunch packed by the school, so I managed to score about 12 free lunches in the end.
We make it back to town on time for me to drop in at home, drop the lunches off, stick them in the fridge, go to the bathroom and hit the ground running again. The afternoon route has no major problems. I'm hoping for poor weather so that my night field trip is cancelled, but no such luck.
The second field trip of the day is to a nearby blueberry field where some random guy has a telescope set up to view the various items in space. The field trip was designated for 6th grade middle school science students. Two of us drove for the trip. The school trip coordinator, Mr. Floozy, separated the students into two groups, boys and girls. I had 60+ boys on my bus, the other driver had the 70+ girls. I also had another male teacher on my bus named Mr. Military. The girls bus had Ms. Principal, and Ms. Science.
The drive only took 10 minutes, but Mr. Floozy kept trying to tell me how to drive. "Slow down, theres a car there! Don't run into that car!". Once we got to the turn off to the field, he insisted on telling me that the road was "hidden" even though there is a BIG YELLOW ROAD SIGN pointing out where the entrance is and a STREET SIGN also designating the road. I see it, ignore him and turn properly. We maneuver into this field on paths meant for a 4 wheeler or smaller tractor. Mr. Floozy then informs me that I have to make a very tight, almost u-turn, with this bus, on unstable ground in the field. I radio the other driver to hang back a bit to watch what I do, then copy me. We turn in the bus and Mr. Floozy has a panic attack because the other bus ISN'T moving! UM NEWS FLASH - I TOLD her NOT to MOVE! He then tells me no less than THREE times that the other bus MUST park BEHIND me... NOT beside, BEHIND. *face palm*
By this time, the kids notice the TWO port-a-potties in the field and the Itty Bitty Teeny Bladder Committee (IBTBC) strikes about 3 quarters of my packed bus. Naturally Mr. Floozy decides to plow ahead letting me know that the girls will go first with the activity, then the boys. But until then, the kids are to remain ON the bus. Yep. 60 BOYS, packed 3 to a seat on a bus, in the middle of a blueberry field in the middle of nowhere. THIS is going to end well!
By this time, the IBTBC is just aching to get off the bus, Mr. Floozy steps off and takes Mr. Military with him, leaving ME in charge of these rowdy boys. I had assumed that Mr. Military would be back to check in on the bus, NO LUCK. Over the course of three hours, the kids were herded on and off the buses, in freezing cold weather to look at the stars, constellations, moon, and planets visible in the night sky. A majority of this time, I was ALONE in my supervision of the boys on my bus. The girls were thankfully supervised by Ms. Principal. Towards the end of the evening, getting on and off the bus got to some of the girls and they started to feel ill and claustrophobic. Finally Mr. Floozy wrapped up the exercise and informed me that we were taking them to a nearby Dairy Queen for Ice Cream and Soda.
Let me get this straight.... you want to travel to a nearby Dairy Queen to pump 130+ kids full of sugar, and expect to keep ORDER?! ARE YOU INSANE?!?!?!
Mr. Floozy gives me directions to the DQ and complains when I go in the wrong entrance. I bit my tongue and prayed that the words Shut The F--- Up would not exit my mouth at the wrong time. Again, the girls went first at the Dairy Queen, leaving the boys to watch in dismay as they flooded the restaurant and took forever. Mr. Floozy disappeared off the bus leaving me with Mr. Military. We were finally down to the last half of the boys waiting, when Mr. Military stepped off the bus momentarily to remind the girls that there were boys waiting.
One of the boys took this exact moment to punch another boy directly in the nose. I happened to be looking up in my mirror and saw it. I stopped it, but not before the boy who got punched tried to fight back. Nose Boy (the one who got punched) came up to me with a bloody nose. I got him to calm enough to tell me who punched him. I called Puncher Boy to the front to have him readily admit that he punched the other boy. Mr. Military returned to the bus and handled the situation, called the principal of the school (who was not happy) and we returned to town. Nose Boy's mom finds out her son was in a fight and goes apeshit. She calls the cops then comes up to me and asks me if we have video on the bus. I reply calmly yes, we do, and that I would have it pulled. At this point, I had unloaded, was ready to go home, and the cops show up. Eventually I DID get to go home, but not before I was completely exhausted and spent.
NEVER AGAIN will I do a field trip for Mr. Floozy.
Floozy'd Out!
The Bus Driver.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)