Tales from the School Bus

Things your Bus Driver wants you to know, but won't tell you.

2011-12-16T19:51:00.000-08:00

Every so often I see magazines boasting, "12 things your doctor won't tell you" or " 100 million reasons your mother inlaws brothers wifes cousins fiancee doesn't like you". I thought I would put together a list of things that your Bus Driver wants you to know, but won't tell you.

1. When we tell you your child's pick up time is between 6:15 and 6:30 am, we usually mean that we will get there around 6:40. We tell you the earlier time so that you will actually have your child to the designated stop around the time we ACTUALLY get there. The same goes for afternoon drop off.

2. If you are the parent of an elementary age child, we cannot leave them alone at the stop unless you give us written permission. We also need you to be at the stop or at your door within eyesight of the bus driver.

3. We are NOT babysitters. Being late consistently to the afternoon bus stop will result in your child being dropped off at the sheriff or police station after we have dropped off all other children. If you do this once, we understand and try to work with you, but as a general rule, we do not wait for you to decide when the stop is. Be there when your child gets home.

4. UPDATE YOUR CONTACT NUMBERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I cannot stress this enough. There is nothing worse than a crying child on my bus when I cannot get ahold of you because your FIFTH phone number provided for the child on my emergency contact card does not work because it is "disconnected". Not only that, your child's school often does not have updated numbers because if you changed numbers you likely didn't update either. Please make our lives easier by at least keeping one working number. Tracphone is cheap!!!!!!!

5. If we send a note home, please speak with your child about the behavior listed on the note. We don't write these notes for our own health, but for our sanity, please teach your child the proper behavior on the bus. Often, a note is a last resort and we will generally ask to contact you to discuss your child's behavior on the bus. Please note that we DO try to work with you as much as possible to prevent your child from losing his riding privilege, but if you continually ignore our notes, refuse to speak with us, or decidedly tell us that your child is NOT the problem, I guarantee THAT will be the last time I try to contact you about the behavior. I'll simply write your child up and let the school deal with them.

6. We did not suspend your child off the bus, the principal made that decision. Take it up with your child's school and do not threaten me. If you had worked with me in the first place to correct your child's behavior, you wouldn't be as ticked off.

7. If your child acts out, MY attention is on your child and NOT on the road. That puts the whole bus in danger each time I have to turn my attention to your child for crawling under the seat for the 50th time.

8. If we contact you by telephone at any time other than between the hours of 6 am and 8 am, and 2 pm and 4:30 pm. We DO NOT get paid. Please respect our personal time and our families by being considerate and answering your phone when we do call. When we can't reach you (see number 4) and you call my boss complaining that I never called you, that does NOT gain bonus points with me.

9. Say thank you once in a while. We get yelled at, told we are stupid, and have our stop signs and other lights ignored by people who are just in a rush to get from point A to point B. Sometimes a simple thank you is much appreciated and will go a long way when and if your child acts out on my bus because you have opened that communication line with me.

10. We do have the right to assign seats. Calling me to ask why your child has an assigned seat will not get you an answer, nor will it get your child to change seats. Your child is not the only one with an assigned seat and has probably been assigned a seat for a good reason. Also, asking for your child to switch seats on a bus that is already crowded three to a seat is usually not possible, nor is demanding your child only sit with such and so only in their seat. If the bus is crowded, we do what we can to provide space, but sometimes, its just not possible. Your child needs to deal with it, or stop riding my bus.

To Be Continued......

Be Nice or Leave,

The Bus Driver

The Importance of an Address

2011-12-04T21:41:00.001-08:00

On Friday, I took a very long field trip and did not return home until about 2 am. Normally, field trips run very smoothly and have very little if no hiccups. Occasionally we won't know the area, but on those occasions, a coach can give us either an address or very detailed directions. I have a personal GPS, so an address is very handy to have since all I have to do is plug it in, and hit "go".

This concept, however, was lost on the two coaches that I drove on Friday. I show up on time for the field trip and before we set out, I ask them for an address or directions and get told, "Oh we've been there before, I know where I'm going!" I'm thinking, "THIS is going to end well!"

We get to our midway point and about 10 miles prior to getting there, I inquire as to where the coaches would like to eat. One coach asks me, "There's a Subway there isn't there?" I check my GPS and confirm there is a Subway nearby, and then we have the following exchange:

Coach 1 (confidently) - The Subway is over by the Mc Donalds in that truck stop.

Me - I don't think so... the restaurant is on the other side of Burger King.

Coach 1 - No, I'm right, its by Mickey D's.

Me - I think it goes Mc D's, Truck Stop, BK, and then Subway.... all on the same side of the road.

Coach 1 - No, I'm right....

When we get there, guess who was right? Yep, me.

At the end of the stop, I again asked to see the directions. So, Coach 2 has his wife pull the papers out of the TRASH bag. So, directions in hand, we set out again. I finally get the name of the road we are supposed to be on and plug it into my GPS. I figure, if we get turned around, at least I can get us to the road and then we can search for the destination from there.

We finally exit off the highway and I ask which way to go, left or right. Noone seems to know, so I play it by ear, look at the map in my GPS and get us to the road in question. The coaches are freaking out because they think we are on the wrong road when in actuality, the road itself is the same, the name just changes through an intersection. They didn't seem to understand that and insisted I was wrong and had them on the wrong road. Remember, THEY had been there before and obviously, I was wrong. Their directions read, "As soon as you pass a fire station on the right, the destination will be the next road to the right." Sure enough, I pass a fire station and I point out the destination, and they deny it is because after all noone knows if this road is the correct road, even though my GPS says it is. So, we drive around to Timbuktu and finally end up right where we started where they made me go the wrong way.

I ended up turning around, getting back on the SAME road that I told them was the right road, and to the same place I told them was the destination. Of course I had to listen to the coaches gripe about ME making THEM late and how its all MY fault that I didn't know the destination. Right.

"Turn Right Ahead"

The Bus Driver

Is there an AED available? (Updated)

2011-10-24T08:25:00.001-07:00

This weekend has been one heck of a weekend. Saturday, I had to pick up an elderly gentleman from dialysis. I had transported him once before and had issues then. Last time, he tried climbing the steps of the bus only to fall backwards and ONTO me. I luckily caught him and set him down gently. I ended up calling the fire department to help get him off the ground since I could not lift him, nor could he help me lift him. After that fiasco, I prayed I would not have issues this time. I was wrong.

I got to dialysis, and the nurse comes out and tells me he had pulled one of his own needles. He bled everywhere inside dialysis, and they were getting the bleeding stopped and him cleaned up. I had one other pick up from dialysis who had already boarded the bus and was waiting for transport. The gentleman finally comes out, pushing his walker. He seemed to be walking okay, and I escorted him out, let down the lift, and he walked on. He got himself settled, gripped the handrails of the lift and I pressed the button to raise the lift. We made nonsense chat the whole time. The lift got to the level of the bus (about 4 feet off the ground) and he went to put his hands back on his walker, and suddenly stopped talking to me.

He fainted, fell forward and to the left away from me. I was able to grab him to stop him from toppling completely off the lift. I called his name out trying to get him to respond, and yelled to the person on the bus to get help. He came to, and I told him to hold still and help was on the way. The nurse from dialysis came out, saw him, and helped me get him back on the lift, so he wasn't dangling off the lift. I thought his arm had started bleeding again, so the nurse and I switched spots, and then the nurse told another nurse to get a bag of saline and to call the ambulance. I was holding his leg which he had scratched and it was bleeding slightly. He told us he was going to faint again. They started a line and pushed fluids. Then he stopped responding all together.

The nurses told me we needed to let the lift down and get an airway on him. I was still holding his leg so I told a third nurse how to press the button to let the lift down. Once he was on the ground, we flipped him and I elevated his legs. They were still trying to get him to respond. The main nurse shouted for a stethoscope and told the other nurse to call the ambulance and tell them we needed them NOW! They couldn't get a heartbeat or a pulse and started CPR compressions. I asked if there was an AED (Automatic External Defibrillator) available, and the fire chiefs truck arrived. The firefighters got out and asked the same question. The nurse told the firefighters where to find the AED. At that point I got up and set his legs down gently and asked the nurses if they had his daughters phone number. They didn't have it, so I called the one number on my transit sheet praying that the number worked.

I got ahold of someone of the family who was able to get in touch with his daughter. I explained the situation really quickly, while listening and watching them work on him. The AED shocked him 4-5 times. His eyes were open and vacant and he was not responding. The ambulance arrived and they continued chest compressions and went to get him on the stretcher so they could intubate him. They secured him to the backboard and immediately loaded him into the ambulance after it was clear he was NOT reviving. They went off to the hospital.

Turns out, he did not survive. The coroner said his heart stopped. May he rest in peace.

Sending up Prayers,

The Bus Driver

Blind Confidence

2011-10-12T14:09:00.000-07:00

One of the most valuable lessons was one I learned on my first day as a bus driver.

"Go Slow... Eventually, they all get off."

Sometimes I have absolutely NO CLUE where I'm going. Kinda bad considering I'm the driver! I can't tell you how many times I have to rely on the children to tell me the route, the coaches to tell me how to get to the fields, and the teachers to tell me how to get to the museums. Most of the time, I am able to get a general idea of where we are going prior to leaving on trips or driving bus routes, but many times, I fake it.

Yes, I fake it. I pretend like I know what route I'm on when I'm driving a bus route, I pretend like I know how to get there when driving a trip, and I pretend that I know each and every child's parent or legal guardian especially when they are causing trouble. I go everywhere with Blind Confidence. It enables me to set aside my worries and just go with the flow. I don't concern myself with extra problems and simply "let it ride."

I have too much else to worry about than figuring out exactly where the stop is, or what time we'll be back from a trip. I don't worry about the child on my bus nearly as much as the PEOPLE outside my bus. Don't get me wrong, I worry about the kids too, but so many drivers are distracted with cell phones, texting, and other things that they often don't "SEE" the big yellow bus with flashing lights that cannot stop on a dime.

Pull out in front of me and cut me off when I'm traveling fast? I can't stop. Failure to maintain YOUR lane? I can't help that I'm in my lane and making my turn as wide as possible. Slam on your brakes for that cute little dog? This bus cannot stop as quick as your little car, and we have upwards of 60 precious lives on board.

All I ask other drivers to do is to be more aware of whats around them. Think before you run that flashing stop sign on the bus. The life you spare may just be your own kid.

Deep in Thought,

The Bus Driver

Can I get some Lift Assistance please?

2011-09-17T22:15:00.000-07:00

Today, I went to pick up an elderly gentleman to take him to dialysis. On my sheet, it said that he had a walker. Most folks with walkers that we pick up can at least climb up and down the steps with very little assistance, though we do have those who use the walker who know they cannot get up and down the stairs, so they request use of the lift. We have no problem letting the lift down for folks who need it and require it. It can be operated while the client is standing, holding onto the support bars on the side for stability, or while the client is in a wheelchair.

This gentleman came out with his walker and was pushing it down the ramp. He gets to the bus and I ask him if he can get up the stairs, or if I need to let down the lift for him to get on. He tells me, "I can make it up the stairs." So, taking him at his word, we progress to the entrance of the bus. He lifts his right leg up to the first step and grips the handrail of the stairs, then he tries to push and get his left leg up. He can't quite make it so he asks me for, "a little push."

I position myself behind him and go to help stabilize him to get his second foot up and he curls up and pretty much leans back into me, letting go of the hand rails of the bus. I caught him under his armpits and gently lowered him to the ground. I then got in front of him and positioning the walker with a seat behind him, I thought if we could at least get him up to the walker seat, he might be able to scootch himself up onto the seat and back up to standing position. Then I could let the lift down, and let him ride up on the lift.

No Dice.

Down to the ground he goes again. He wanted to try crawling to the bus stairs and getting up that way. He still couldn't get himself up. By this point, I had made the judgement call to call someone for help. I dialed the non-emergency number and let the dispatch lady know that, while he was NOT hurt, we needed someone to come and help lift him up from the ground. About 10 minutes later, the fire chief and two of his firefighters showed up to help get him up off the ground. He rode the lift up and we got him to dialysis where I borrowed a wheelchair from the company and pushed him into the building.

In retrospect, the ramp should have been a clue that he could not manage stairs. I called the bossman and notified him of the incident and he informed me that I made the proper decision.

Lifting Up,

The Bus Driver

Inspiration

2011-09-16T16:29:00.000-07:00

I recently came across this poem by Taylor Mali and felt I needed to share it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fuBmSbiVXo0&feature=related

Feel free to click on the link and check it out. I'm not entirely sure how to post a video on here and its not mine anyways, so I mean no copyright violation.

Please Pass on the Left

2011-08-12T16:19:00.000-07:00

Normally, this is not a hard concept. Passing on the left is something you learn in drivers education. It is enforced in the practical part of driving on a highway. It is reviewed on the written test! Again this is a fool proof concept, yet people still insist on passing on the right. I'm even guilty of passing on the right but only when there is an idiot who won't get out of the passing lane and is going painfully slow.

Our most common problem is people passing our stop signs while we are loading or unloading children. When they are caught by the police, they always claim they never saw the big yellow bus or thought they could "beat the bus". Sadly, this means they play chicken with children's lives. We can lecture children all day on the proper way to cross a street, board a bus, and debark from the bus, but the fact of the matter is, children get excited, forget instructions, and often dash out in the road without any regard for their own safety. What appalls me even more is when people insist on passing on the right (door side) of the bus as we are letting children off. Several children have either had close calls, or been struck in their own driveways due to the carelessness of ADULT drivers.

You would think bus drivers understand this concept more than the regular driver. Right? Wrong! This morning, a bus driver came around my bus on school property, coming between my bus and the school bus loop sidewalk on the RIGHT side of my bus. She got within 4 feet of my door, noticed it was open and stopped, but only momentarily. I saw her out of the corner of my eye, and grabbed the middle school child getting off and told her to STOP. After the driver of the other bus determined we were not letting any children off due to her reckless behavior, she continued up past the door. She did not call us over the cb radio to apologize or ask if we were letting children off.

Naturally, I took this incident to the bossman.

Astounded,

The Bus Driver

The First Day of School!!!!

2011-08-09T21:30:00.000-07:00

Today was wonderful. I felt right at home on the big yellow bus. It felt totally natural behind the wheel. I had about 20 kids on the bus this morning and I greeted all of them with a good morning and a smile on my face. They were all excitedly chattering and ready for the first day. I found myself realizing that I missed the kids!

Things went very smoothly for the morning. Some kids did get left at their stops (or the driver forgot them), but overall the kids got to school safely. On my bus, I had a 7th grader who rode to the High School. His sister had informed me that he did not go to Middle School A, served by the bus, and instead is attending Middle School B across town by the High School. Unfortunately due to school zones, buses are only allowed to go to the schools they are assigned. We are not allowed to deviate out of school zones unless we are directed to by the Dispatcher.

When I got to the High School, the 7th grade boy tried to get off, but I stopped him and made him wait until I figured out what to do with him. Eventually I took him over to Middle School B and dropped him off for the day. Apparently he is considered a "School Option" child. When our schools do not make AYP (Adequate Yearly Progress) as defined by test scores by the state, then the school has to offer other school options. We have 5 elementary schools, 2 middle schools, and one high school. Middle School A did not make AYP so kids that normally would attend Middle School A have the option of attending Middle School B instead.

Apparently there is supposed to be a bus that transports School Option children from one middle school to the other. This was not told to us at the meeting we had on Monday, nor did I receive a list of children whom have elected to participate in the school option.

Anyways, that was the only hang up I experienced today. The afternoon went equally as smoothly with very little time delays. Students got home relatively close to normal time and it seemed we operated as a well oiled machine. People just fell into place, kids did what they were supposed to, and parents seemingly stayed calm. Unfortunately, the real chaos will occur in a few days when parents stop taking their children to school and buses start to fill up. Parents will complain, buses will get crowded, and kids will fall out of honeymoon stage.

Honeymooning in bliss!

The Bus Driver

Overheard - Mc Donalds

2011-08-05T23:09:00.000-07:00

I was babysitting today for a friend of mine and the kids and I went to McDonalds. The bonus of most Mickey D's is that their play place is located inside and is in an air conditioned area. The only place that would trump Mickey D's indoor play area would be the play area in one of the Burger Kings when I was growing up.

I also realized, most of the playground equipment is now made of hardened plastic. There are very rare playgrounds filled with the metal equipment that I played with as a kid. I distinctly remember our playground was all metal equipment and hard ground. There were no wood chips or sawdust, or sand, to break our falls. Only hard dirt. There were also plenty of tree roots that would spring up when we would play tag. It would almost be like the trees wanted to play tag with us.

I digress. I was sitting at Mickey D's enjoying my burger when one of the girls I was babysitting has the following exchange with her sister:

Girl 1 - (looking at the little smurf figurines that they have in kids meals) Why do they call him Papa Smurf. He isn't the father of all those smurfs!

Girl 2 - (thinking a bit) Well he could be!

Girl 1 - Well, he must have had lots of wives!!!!

Smurfing along!

The Bus Driver

How can you "miss" a child?

2011-07-29T21:56:00.000-07:00

One of the questions I find myself asking all the time is "How on earth can you miss a child?" I read articles like this one where the bus driver is arrested for leaving a student unattended on the bus for a period of time. Usually, its a ridiculous amount of time like 4 to 6 hours where the child will go unnoticed. Yes children sleep on the bus, and it can be difficult to see a child especially when they are laying down in the seat fast asleep.

Every bus driver is supposed to make a cursory walk through of their bus checking the seats for any sleeping children. I usually have a 5th grader or teenager at the last school I drop off check the bus for "sleepers" morning and evening. Even with that, if I am not sure and positive that I dropped every child, I still make a walk through of the bus to ensure no child is left behind. It can be very easy to overlook a child that may be sleeping on the floor underneath the seats, but it does not happen often enough.

My biggest gripe is reading stories of SPECIAL EDUCATION drivers leaving their special needs students on the bus. Now most special education buses have a pair of people on the bus, one to drive, and one to manage the children on board. What I don't understand is how did TWO sets of eyes miss these children that are apparently "sleeping." All too often, drivers are in a hurry to vacate the buses, especially on hot days with no air conditioning on the bus.

There are safety measures in place, including a child check alarm (in place on newer buses) that will sound if the driver does not go to the back of the bus to press a little silver button on the back wall and tries to open the front doors. In newer buses, the child check alarm comes on automatically after 10 minutes of bus running time, and gives a 10 to 15 minute buffer time when the bus is turned off for the driver to go back and press the button. Some child check alarm systems require the door to be closed before the alarm can be de-activated. Others, it doesn't matter the position of the door. Often if I leave the door closed, walk to the back, press the button, and open the door when I get back to the front, the alarm never sounds at all, but I've then made my cursory walk of the interior of the bus searching for any children that may be sleeping.

I also have a solution for sleeping children. Many drivers place their most chronic "sleepers" in the first few seats of the bus. That way, its easy to see who got on and who did not, plus its easier to keep track of those who sleep. If parents are worried that their child did not make it to school, I encourage parents to touch base with their child's teacher to express their concerns in the care of their children so that they can establish a system to follow if their child does not arrive at school after riding the bus.

After a long hard day of learning, many children (especially younger ones) are prone to falling asleep in the afternoon. If we show up at your designated bus stop and your child does not get off, please feel free to stay calm while you contact the school and bus shop. It may be that junior fell asleep and the driver simply missed him. If you call us, please give us time to stop the bus, park it out of the way of danger, and allow us time to check for your child. We have 60 other children on the bus besides yours, and we try to do our best to ensure that all the children arrive to and from school safely.

Checking the Bus,

The Bus Driver

Camp Fun!!!

2011-07-11T21:56:00.000-07:00

Recently, I had the pleasure to drive the 4H kids up to their yearly week long camp out. I was only going up to drop them off, and then head back home, but lots of fun was had throughout the ride up. There were two buses going this year, about 60 kids in total.

Before we even left the 4H parking lot, a concerned parent stepped up on the bus after one boy had been sent to the other bus because his name was on the other bus' list. Apparently, she was concerned because a boy on my bus was the cousin of the boy who got sent to the other bus. She was worried they would not be allowed to even see each other during camp or be in the same group. The lady running the trip reassured her that the kids would be in the same cabin and they would certainly see each other for the whole camp.

What some parents don't realize is that while cousins might be in the same cabin at night, and see each other during meals; when they go to activities, they'll probably be split into different interest groups and evenly distributed among other 4H groups. Part of the fun of camp is making new friends and strengthening knowledge through fun and games. To be honest, the kids don't care WHAT group they're in. As long as they are having fun and making friends, they are happy. They don't even miss their electronics such as cellphones, ipods, and other items.

A lot of children are far more independent than their parents want to admit. When parents just let go a little bit and allow their children to experience new things, their children become better rounded individuals. Camp is about building friendship and keeping fun alive and it provides a safe supervised environment without the overshadowing of parents who are trying to control their children's every move.

I hope that these kids at 4H camp this week have a great time and bring back awesome memories. I know I did when I went to camp.

Singing Camp Songs,

The Bus Driver

Wal-Mart Rudeness Revisited

2011-06-04T10:09:00.000-07:00

Driving transit is never dull. I experience all sorts of different people, on and off transit. Most people are courteous and respectful. Occasionally, we get people who expect the world to bow down to them as though they are entitled.

A few weeks back, I blogged about the lady who decided to argue over a parking space. As expected then, she didn't get her way, but it goes to show there is no boundary to rudeness. Today I pulled into Wal-Mart to let a handicapped gentleman off the bus so he could do his shopping. As I pull into the front of the store, I pass the Home Goods entrance and go to pull by the Food Center where I normally let people off and there is a big SUV parked at an angle with the majority of the vehicle blocking part of the entrance and the lane of traffic and the tail end blocking both lanes of traffic. The vehicle is clearly in a "No Parking" zone.

Rude Lady behind the wheel is busy talking with her friend at the entrance to Wal-Mart. There is clearly not enough space for me to pull around and let my passenger off without blocking traffic or causing a major traffic jam in both directions. I pull up and wait for her to notice me and give her a chance to politely end her conversation, or at least make arrangements for the conversation to be continued at a later time. Rude Lady glances my way and returns to her conversation, effectively ignoring me. I beep the horn twice and raise my hands as if to ask, "Are you going to move?" She glares at me and then pulls her vehicle a couple feet up and towards the entrance, still in the "No Parking" zone and still blocking at least one lane of traffic.

I barely had enough room to pull around her large SUV and had space to let down the wheelchair lift. As I pulled to the side very carefully, the gentleman in the wheelchair remarked, "I think she gave you the finger!" I hadn't noticed if she had because I was too busy maneuvering my large bus around her wrongly parked SUV. As I let down the lift, I pulled a Wal-Mart employee aside and pointed her out and suggested they tell her to move because she was clearly blocking traffic or call the police to get her to move. Rude Lady and her friend are glaring at me as are their kids.

The Wal-Mart employee approached her and told her to move because she was blocking traffic, and she rolled her eyes at the employee! The sad thing is, she did this in front of her kids and her friends kids. I only wonder what these kids are learning with the disrespect their parents show.

Feeling disrespected,

The Bus Driver

End of Year Celebration

2011-05-31T22:16:00.000-07:00

Our last day was May 20 and it was a fairly awesome day. The last week of school is usually the most hectic on the bus because the kids are ramping up for their end of the year festivities, they are excited for the summer, and they always conveniently forget how to ride a bus properly. Of course this leads to several write up's and flustered bus drivers, but in the end it all works out.

Luckily, in my 5 years of driving a bus, I have learned to just roll with the punches. I don't sweat the petty stuff and don't bother to engage the kids in a power struggle, its simply not worth it. After a whole year of kids acting like twits, causing trouble for the sake of causing trouble, and basically deciding to do everything in their power to NOT follow the rules, one local middle school had the BEST way of "getting back" at the hormonal pre-teen/teens.

Water guns.

Everyone from the teachers, to the principal, to the coaches, to the janitors all came armed to school with super soaker water guns. They pre-filled them and set up buckets of water out in the bus loop for maximum enjoyment. Then, when school was dismissed for the summer and all the wonderful cherubs were orderly and quickly filing out of the school to get on the buses, they opened FIRE!

Mass chaos, girls screeching, guys yelping as the cold water hit them full force from all those folks who put up with them all year.

Revenge is best served cold!

The Bus Driver

Bullies

2011-05-13T10:02:00.001-07:00

Bullies come in all shapes and sizes. They can be the smallest child, or your boss at work. Bullying should not be tolerated in any shape or form whether it be in the workplace, at school, or at home. As a bus driver, I look out for bullies. I put a stop to bullying on any bus that I drive immediately.

Sometimes I am the one bullied by the students. Or, at least they try to bully me. It doesn't work the way they plan because I typically go toe to toe, nose to nose with them and let them know that they do not intimidate me. Often, bullies are simply looking for the attention of the victim and other students.

This week, I experienced a high schooler who tried to push my buttons by telling other students around him lies about me. He deliberately sat 3 seats behind me so that he would be close enough to the front so that I could hear his obnoxious comments. In this case, he was looking for a reaction. I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction. He wanted me to get in a confrontation with him because he kept saying he would "cuss" me out. Funny enough, his beef with me spanned back 4-5 months when I last drove that bus. I couldn't figure out why he was so upset with me as a driver, but apparently I did something that made him angry enough to be as obnoxious as he was. I let him off and didn't let it worry me, but I did notify my boss and pulled the tape.

Later that afternoon, he continued his taunting, but not until we were almost to his stop. Then it hit me. The route is located in an area that has one road that is paved with dead end roads jutting out from it. The route, as I learned it, dropped the last stop off at the intersection of two of these dead end roads and the main road. It has always been this way, and I had not been notified of any changes. The last time I was on the bus, the kids tried to tell me that the driver now went down the dead end roads. The truth is, we only go down the dead end roads when it is raining.

The boy who was taunting me got off at the last stop in the afternoon.

He simply did not want to walk down the road. It only hit me when I pulled up to the last stop and opened the door and said politely, "Have a nice day." The boy got so angry and upset and started running his mouth while he got off the bus. He happened to get on at a different stop in the morning, so the location of the stop confused me. In the end, I got him back, because he had to walk anyways.

I found out later, that the new bus driver had changed the route around and hadn't told anyone or cleared it with the bossman. So as a result, I legitimately did not know about any changes in the route. In the end, I got back at the boy. He deserved it!

Bouncing down the road!

The Bus Driver

Snobby Old Ladies

2011-05-09T19:08:00.000-07:00

I was driving for transit today when I had a pick up at a local Dollar Store. My client stated she needed to run to Walmart briefly. Since it was next door and I was 15 minutes early, I didn't mind waiting extra. I circled the parking lot a couple of times and then pulled down into the parking lot. The bus is a handicap accessible bus and has privileges to park in handicap spots. I pulled into one of the spots close to the front, but since Walmart parking lot was mobbed, I didn't feel comfortable leaving a little bit of the bus out in the way of traffic. The parking lot has all diagonal parking spaces instead of straight spaces.

The person in the spot next to the one I had pulled had vacated the spot. I quickly backed out and then pulled up out of the way of traffic and covering two spaces. I flipped my hazard lights on, knowing I would be gone within the next 15 minutes. I even pulled up far enough that people had plenty of space to get around me. Thats when Chihuahua Lady decides to pull up at my rear end and HONK her horn LOUDLY. She honks twice more, and when its clear I'm not moving, she flips her blinker on and pulls LEFT almost into my bus, trying to edge me out. Now I'm parked, not moving. She honks her horn again and I see her get agitated more and she is blocking traffic waiting on me to move.

I watch her pull up to my passenger door. I open the door and she rolls down her window, revealing her and her little pet chihuahua. I explain that I am waiting for someone. She remarks quite rudely "WELL, THATS NO WAY TO PARK!" Her chihuahua is yapping at me through the window. I apologize again and she remarks "Well, the POLICE will come and tell you." I just shut the door and she drives off in a huff all angry.

Apparently it seems I was in HER parking space. The one SHE wanted. Yep, I inconvenienced HER. In the end, I left within 15 minutes, and the police were not called to fix her civil dispute with me. I'm sorry if my parking the bus inconvenienced you, but your car is NOT the only car in this parking lot. The ironic thing is, to the right was a space RIGHT in front. But she decided to pick a dispute with me over the way I parked.

Parking Wars,

The Bus Driver

Exspomation and Snobby Teachers

2011-05-08T18:58:00.000-07:00

Recently, the neighbor and I got into a conversation about school. Her son is graduating from pre-k and advancing onto kindergarten. She related a story about "exspomation". Her son told her one morning that he needed an object to exspomate at school. He had to bring it in. He finally selected a stuffed leopard and when he held it up for the teacher, proudly saying, "Ms Teacher! I brought my leopard to exspomate!!!" His teacher knowingly said, "Oh!, I don't know if I can ESTIMATE that many spots!" His mother laughed.

The last 3 weeks have been filled with non-stop field trips. I've been to the bowling alley, the museum of science,and various other locations. We are closing in on the last week of school with the speed of a freight train. As we near the end of school and summer starting, I hope that folks will take caution in driving around the streets during the next three months because of all the children who will be out and about.

The bowling alley provided lots of entertainment with a pre-k class. Those children prefer the "zig zag" method of bowling which basically involves throwing the ball at a hap hazard angle, and watching it bounce perilously against the side bumpers back and forth. Its cute to watch them celebrate knocking down just one pin.

My trip to the museum was equally as interesting. I experienced the snobbiest teachers I've ever come across. Teachers, if you take a field trip, please speak to the bus driver and at least make some polite conversation. Also, if you have directions to the place, please just hand the paper to the bus driver and let the bus driver utilize the directions to the best of their ability. Most of the time, I get along with teachers just fine. I've taken this group on field trips before and the teachers were exactly the same. I thought the first time was just a fluke, and that maybe I was imagining that they were snobby. They were actually snobby. One teacher actually physically turned her head away from me whenever I even asked a simple question, and refused to even look at me. She also acted annoyed. On the plus side, I got to drive the brand new bus (less than 500 miles on it) to the museum. The bus had an air ride drivers seat that was really comfortable!!!!

My last field trip of the season was a pre-k class to a teachers house for a "water day". Unfortunately the weather did not cooperate and the children, who were told to only put their feet in the water, were soaked. They had fun anyways. Besides, you cannot simply tell a pre-k child to NOT get wet... on a WATER day... yeah.

Waiting for Summer (10 days!)

The Bus Driver

The Emergency Evacuation

2011-04-12T20:07:00.001-07:00

It was a typical Thursday evening. I had just gotten home from my after-school program run and was just putting my feet up and getting ready to eat dinner (thank you microwave dinners deluxe)when a phone call interrupted my, one time a week, quiet evening at home.

"Ms. Bus Driver, its an emergency, can you help?"

Amazing how one phone call can cause so much havoc in one evening. Not really knowing what I was about to get myself into, I immediately said, "Yes, what do you need me to do?"

"Go to Transit, get a bus with a lift, and go out to Nearby Town, and help evacuate the nursing home. There is a fire. Make sure you call Mr. Bossman when you get to Transit."

By the word "fire", the adrenaline was pumping, and I had already put my shoes on and was on the way down the stairs. The call came in at 6:51 pm. I was at Transit and on a bus by 6:54 pm. I was entering Nearby Town following the ambulances with lights and sirens by 7:07 pm. By 7:09, I was at the nursing home.

The smoke was thick. It felt like a hot August night and the road was blocked off. The fire reached within 30 feet of the nursing home. We were against a wall of smoke racing against time to get the residents to safety. It was chaos. Organized chaos, but chaos. Police were redirecting traffic, roads were closed, trains were stopped. The fire had jumped the 4 lane highway in several places. The county had come to a standstill. Reports flew in, 1000 acres burned, then 2000, then 5000, then 7000+. Damage is unknown. Speculation begins: Was it a careless brush fire, Was it someone burning trash, Was it a controlled burn out of control?

WHOP WHOP WHOP WHOP WHOP The helicopter soars overhead dropping water on hot spots where the trucks can't reach. Homes are in danger, some already burning. People are being evacuated to nearby churches, schools, towns. Fire departments from all over are battling the blaze. Emotions are running high and the intensity is heart pounding.

School buses, Transit buses, and Ambulances are piled into the parking lot at the nursing home. I load up two people in wheelchairs, secure them and go to make my way over to the safety shelter. I return again in the hopes of helping to transport supplies, or other needed items or other people who needed transport. I think it takes about 40-50 minutes to evacuate everyone. Ambulances are making several return trips for bed bound residents. Over at the evacuation shelter, people are swarming, nurses are working to make sure everyone is safe and the smell of smoke hangs in the air. The nursing home becomes a ghost town.

Did I just help evacuate a nursing home?

Wow.

The Bus Driver

What are we going to do if it rains?

2011-03-09T19:11:00.001-08:00

More importantly, this should be titled, "Why should parents be home when their children get home from school?" A whole issue brewed between a fellow bus driver and a parent earlier this week. Since the child lives down near the end of a dead-end dirt road, the bus cannot go down to the end of the road and risk getting stuck in mud or sand in an attempt to turn around and come out. Instead, we drop the child off at the corner, and she has to walk a measly 2 and a half bus lengths (about 100 feet) to her driveway. We have never gone down to the end of that road and have always dropped off at the corner. There is simply no place for a 40 foot long vehicle to turn around at the end.

Because the child is in 3rd grade, we ask that the parent be visible to the bus driver before the driver will let the child off. This means the parent needs to either be at the end of the driveway or at the actual stop. The alternative to the parent being at the stop is to have the parent sign a letter stating that someone will be home to receive the child every day. A majority of the time, parents seem to feel "inconvenienced" by their children. How dare we ask them to interrupt whatever they're doing, in order to be home for their child?

So, the parent found themselves up at the bus shop in my boss' office. The mother was demanding we make an exception for her child. I only happen to know about this child because while the bus driver was out one afternoon, the child began to ride the bus. I stopped at the end of the road (closest to the paved highway road) and the child said "I live all the way down this road." I told her not to worry, but that I had a few other stops before her designated stop. When I stopped to let her off at the corner closest to her house, the child claimed I missed her house. So, I kept her on the bus until the end of the route, letting her know I'd go back down the road. Maybe I got the numbers wrong, maybe I misread the bus pass, maybe I was at fault. We traveled down the road, and she informed me that her house was 3-4 houses past the corner where I originally told her to get off the bus, down towards the dead end part of the road. I informed her that this would be her stop and that she would need to walk to and from this point. She seemed to accept it.

The mother was in my boss' office when I overheard the conversation. The mother was not understanding why we couldn't go to the end of the road and drop her child off at her driveway. I peeked my head in and interjected that I had been the one to drop the child off on the first day, and the mother accused me of trying to MAKE her child get off the bus at the "Highway". I informed her that I told her daughter that I would be going down that road, and explained that I let her off at the corner closest to the house. After this, I had to get going, and I over heard her ask my boss. "What are ya'll gonna do if it rains?"

I had to stifle laughter and bite my tongue as my answer whispered through my lips. "Buy an umbrella and a poncho."

Washed Away,

The Bus Driver

Pollen Did It

2011-02-27T21:23:00.000-08:00

The little boy who lives across the parking lot from me is obsessed with the transit bus that I drive regularly. He can't help it, he's 4. He usually requests a "ride around the parking lot" in the bus. Occasionally, I let him. I also let him operate the door, and he always asks questions about the buttons and knobs on the panel at the front of the bus. He's absolutely adorable. Today, he and his mother were out in the parking lot having some "outside" time and I pull in on the bus. He runs to the door after I get parked and informs me of some very important news.

Busboy: Ms. Bus Driver, guess what!?

Me: What Busboy?

Busboy (very authoritatively): SomeBODY put stuff all over our car this morning, but I washed it off all by myself!

Me: Oh really? Who would do such a thing?

Busboy (knowingly): "Pollen" did it!

I must set out to find this "Pollen" and make sure he is brought to justice!

Giggling,

The Bus Driver

Overheard - BonBons

2011-02-23T05:05:00.000-08:00

Most of the time, the morning routes are uneventful. Kids are just waking up, are still sleepy, and are often quieter in the morning. Not the case with BonBon Girl. BonBon Girl is in everyone's business. I don't think that child sleeps at night, she always seems so wired up. She acts out enough that she has earned herself a permanent front seat. Unfortunately we still have to remind her to sit down and turn around. She tends to tell the other kids what to do, and again, we have to remind her to mind her own business several times during the route.

Anyhow, the following exchange happened between BonBon Girl and another child on the bus this morning:

BonBon Girl: When people get pregnant, they eat BonBons!

Other Child: Ew....

BonBon Girl: What? Its just chocolate! They eat Twinkies too!

Somehow, I really don't want to know what started that conversation!

Nibbling Chocolate(and NOT pregnant)!

The Bus Driver

Good Morning or Good Afternoon?

2011-02-21T16:30:00.000-08:00

Ms. Elderly is back with a third installment. To fully appreciate her, you need to read Part 1 and Part 2.

I recently picked up Ms. Elderly and Mr. Stroke for BINGO. They go play bingo at a local church twice a month. It's this huge event and they go play anyways even if they don't win anything. I pick up Ms. Elderly first and head over to Mr. Stroke's house. Mr. Stroke recently had a haircut. I mentioned it, and Ms. Elderly pipes up with, "I like him better with longer hair, its more curly and fits him better." Nothing like saying whats exactly on your mind huh?

I let the lift down to get Mr. Stroke and his powerchair on the bus, and I hear the following exchange between the two as I'm raising the lift.

Ms. Elderly: Good MORNING Mr. Stroke!

Mr. Stroke: Good AFTERNOON Ms. Elderly!

Ms. Elderly: It's not afternoon, its MORNING.

Mr. Stroke: I beg to differ it is AFTERNOON, its after 12.

Keep in mind, this happened at about 12:30 NOON, BINGO doesn't start till after 1:30 pm and both are going early to get good "seats" for the activity. In fact, they were the first there. I climb back into the bus in time to hear Ms. Elderly retort back with, "I guess it IS afternoon then."

When I returned to pick them up around 5 pm, I mentioned that I was surprised that Ms. Crazy - another regular transit rider - wasn't on the bus. Ms. Elderly had something to say about that as well.

Ms. Elderly: Well Ms. Crazy gets a ride from Mr. GuyDownTheRoad. He lives down the road from her about 3 miles. She has ridden with him a couple times, so I guess they're an Item. Well, thats what I think anyways!

Forgive me if I dissolved into fits of laughter at this revelation. If that wasn't enough, this took the icing on the cake.

Ms. Elderly: I brought home two pieces of cake. We had cake for dessert at BINGO. I didn't win anything this time, but I did bring home the cake. No icing though, thats bad for diabetics like me. I hope I can get the cake inside before my daughter finds out I have it hidden in my walker!

Licking the Icing,

The Bus Driver

Messing With Bill Collectors

2011-02-05T10:10:00.000-08:00

Okay, so this post has nothing to do with driving a bus, but it was too good not to share.

I admit it, i'm not the best when it comes to paying my bills on time, all the time. I do get to most of them by at least the 2nd or even 3rd notice. Not really, but occasionally, I do have bills that slip my mind. These are usually unpaid balances on a medical service that I received ONCE way back when. Normally, I'll get a bill like that in the mail, think nothing of it, then when it hits second notice, will send out the money because it slipped my mind the first time.

Two years ago in December 2008, I had a Sinus CT scan done. I thought nothing of the visit since I did not have a co-pay. My insurance covered it all, or so I thought. December 2010, I get this random phone call from an 888 number stating I had a message waiting. So I called back and a lady answers with, "Hello?" No indication that it was a company she worked for, no indication that it was a creditor looking to rectify a bill, NOTHING.

I explain my random phone call from the number, and she places me on hold with a rude, "Hold on." Then she comes back and says very snippingly, "You have an unpaid bill of $6.86 from *Radiology* for a CT scan back in 2008, you need to pay it now." It caught me off guard and being that it was right around the holidays, my first thought was that it was a scammer trying to get my information. My second thought was that if I hadn't seen a bill initially (back in 2008/2009), then I have no idea what she was referring to. Keep in mind, she answered the phone very unprofessionally, so I was right to be cautious. I told her, "Send me a paper bill, because I need to double check with my insurance that I do owe this amount. I also don't feel comfortable with giving my credit card information over the phone." She retorted with, "We wouldn't take your information anyways, there would be a 10 dollar charge to have it processed if we did."

So I hung up and waited. Two weeks later, a bill did appear in my mailbox. I had gone through my insurance claims and found the one claim they were referring to. Again, at this point I had no recollection of receiving a bill for the services at the time of the service. I put it on my "to do" clipboard and ignored it, thinking still that it might be a scam. I got another call from the same 888 number. By this time I was getting irate because they answered the phone in the same snippy tone. All this was over a bill for something that SHOULD have been simply written off. We're arguing over 6 dollars and 86 cents here.

I called the *Radiology* place directly and, after reaffirming they DID send a bill, I got told, "You're not the only one who owes $6.86." Now you pissed me off and insulted me. I had half a mind to get the money in small change, tape it to the envelope in duct tape and send it off duct taped like Fort Knox. I ended up getting a money order instead, costing me 45 cents. I also had to provide my own stamp for THEIR return envelope. So, I did the next best thing. I typed up an itemized Invoice, billing them for the cost of the stamp and for the cost of the money order. A whopping 89 cents. Looking back, I should have included the cost of the paper too. Hopefully, I pissed off the person who opened it, saw my bill to them and thought, "This is Stupid!"

My sentiments EXACTLY.

The Bus Driver

Two Pukers, a Claustrophobic, a Fight and the Cops.

2011-01-30T20:16:00.000-08:00

All of the above happened in the span of 5 hours on one field trip, towards the end of a Very. Long. Day.

That fateful Friday, I had stupidly accepted two field trips on the same day. Now let me preface that by saying, I've done this before with no problems, but it DOES make for a very long day in a big yellow limo. What complicated the day was that I had to complete these field trips IN ADDITION to my regular driving job. So my day consisted of the regular Morning Route, Field Trip number 1, Afternoon Route, and finally Field Trip number 2. Somewhere in the ensuing chaos, I had to schedule time to eat and go to the bathroom. This meant I leave the house at about 6 am, and don't get home until about 11 pm.

The first part of the day went off without a hitch. I drove a route in the morning, then transported a group of very well behaved middle school students to the bowling alley and then over to the mall food court for lunch. Naturally, no kid wanted the lunch packed by the school, so I managed to score about 12 free lunches in the end.

We make it back to town on time for me to drop in at home, drop the lunches off, stick them in the fridge, go to the bathroom and hit the ground running again. The afternoon route has no major problems. I'm hoping for poor weather so that my night field trip is cancelled, but no such luck.

The second field trip of the day is to a nearby blueberry field where some random guy has a telescope set up to view the various items in space. The field trip was designated for 6th grade middle school science students. Two of us drove for the trip. The school trip coordinator, Mr. Floozy, separated the students into two groups, boys and girls. I had 60+ boys on my bus, the other driver had the 70+ girls. I also had another male teacher on my bus named Mr. Military. The girls bus had Ms. Principal, and Ms. Science.

The drive only took 10 minutes, but Mr. Floozy kept trying to tell me how to drive. "Slow down, theres a car there! Don't run into that car!". Once we got to the turn off to the field, he insisted on telling me that the road was "hidden" even though there is a BIG YELLOW ROAD SIGN pointing out where the entrance is and a STREET SIGN also designating the road. I see it, ignore him and turn properly. We maneuver into this field on paths meant for a 4 wheeler or smaller tractor. Mr. Floozy then informs me that I have to make a very tight, almost u-turn, with this bus, on unstable ground in the field. I radio the other driver to hang back a bit to watch what I do, then copy me. We turn in the bus and Mr. Floozy has a panic attack because the other bus ISN'T moving! UM NEWS FLASH - I TOLD her NOT to MOVE! He then tells me no less than THREE times that the other bus MUST park BEHIND me... NOT beside, BEHIND. *face palm*

By this time, the kids notice the TWO port-a-potties in the field and the Itty Bitty Teeny Bladder Committee (IBTBC) strikes about 3 quarters of my packed bus. Naturally Mr. Floozy decides to plow ahead letting me know that the girls will go first with the activity, then the boys. But until then, the kids are to remain ON the bus. Yep. 60 BOYS, packed 3 to a seat on a bus, in the middle of a blueberry field in the middle of nowhere. THIS is going to end well!

By this time, the IBTBC is just aching to get off the bus, Mr. Floozy steps off and takes Mr. Military with him, leaving ME in charge of these rowdy boys. I had assumed that Mr. Military would be back to check in on the bus, NO LUCK. Over the course of three hours, the kids were herded on and off the buses, in freezing cold weather to look at the stars, constellations, moon, and planets visible in the night sky. A majority of this time, I was ALONE in my supervision of the boys on my bus. The girls were thankfully supervised by Ms. Principal. Towards the end of the evening, getting on and off the bus got to some of the girls and they started to feel ill and claustrophobic. Finally Mr. Floozy wrapped up the exercise and informed me that we were taking them to a nearby Dairy Queen for Ice Cream and Soda.

Let me get this straight.... you want to travel to a nearby Dairy Queen to pump 130+ kids full of sugar, and expect to keep ORDER?! ARE YOU INSANE?!?!?!

Mr. Floozy gives me directions to the DQ and complains when I go in the wrong entrance. I bit my tongue and prayed that the words Shut The F--- Up would not exit my mouth at the wrong time. Again, the girls went first at the Dairy Queen, leaving the boys to watch in dismay as they flooded the restaurant and took forever. Mr. Floozy disappeared off the bus leaving me with Mr. Military. We were finally down to the last half of the boys waiting, when Mr. Military stepped off the bus momentarily to remind the girls that there were boys waiting.

One of the boys took this exact moment to punch another boy directly in the nose. I happened to be looking up in my mirror and saw it. I stopped it, but not before the boy who got punched tried to fight back. Nose Boy (the one who got punched) came up to me with a bloody nose. I got him to calm enough to tell me who punched him. I called Puncher Boy to the front to have him readily admit that he punched the other boy. Mr. Military returned to the bus and handled the situation, called the principal of the school (who was not happy) and we returned to town. Nose Boy's mom finds out her son was in a fight and goes apeshit. She calls the cops then comes up to me and asks me if we have video on the bus. I reply calmly yes, we do, and that I would have it pulled. At this point, I had unloaded, was ready to go home, and the cops show up. Eventually I DID get to go home, but not before I was completely exhausted and spent.

NEVER AGAIN will I do a field trip for Mr. Floozy.

Floozy'd Out!

The Bus Driver.

Bathing A Cat

2010-12-24T15:55:00.000-08:00

So this post is a deviation from my normal ranting about the school bus, but this was too funny not to share.

I chose last night to venture into the little known territory that is "Cat Bathing". I currently am a servant to two spoiled felines. Jake, my boycat, looks like he's swallowed a basketball he's so chubby. He is currently on a weight loss diet per vet orders. He is declawed and extremely friendly. Heck, if you just set food in front of him, he'd love you for life. PJ, my girlcat, is my dainty female feline companion. She loathes water and has a general disdain for everything. She keeps herself quite clean. Jake, on the other hand, needs a little help in the cleaning department.

Occasionally I've needed to rinse him down to help his skin from being so itchy, but recently he's been getting bald spots from where fleas or other irritants are plaguing his skin. His skin is quite sensitive and he reacts to any feline immunizations he receives too. The immunizations also cause bald spots, especially frequent where he cannot groom himself effectively. Well, the spots had gotten so bad, that I made the folly of deciding to bathe him.

I prepared myself for the battle. I bought Johnson and Johnson's baby shampoo, grabbed a clean towel from the closet, removed the litterbox from the area so it wouldn't track if wet cat got in it, and settled on finding Jake for his torture... erm... bath.....

I wrangle the basketball into the bathtub and perch him on a seat in the tub. I turn on the water and douse the victim.... cat.... thoroughly. I grab the baby shampoo and open it and squeeze. Nothing comes out. I realize, halfway through struggling with a wet cat, running water, and the bottle... that the bottle is SEALED. Yep. Regular shampoo is unsealed, but Johnson's baby shampoo is sealed tight. I try everything I can to keep the cat in place on the seat while trying to twist open the bottle top. I knocked over my regular shampoo whilst trying to open the bottle over the squirming and yowling Jake. I finally manage to get the bottle top off the bottle, to find the seal impossible to break without fingernails or a good sharp object. I stick the bottle in my mouth intending to only just barely pop the seal to peel the top off, Jake squirms and attempts an escape, and while attempting to catch him, I squeeze the now popped sealed bottle in my mouth resulting in a wonderful mouthful of Johnson's baby shampoo.

Exasperated, I practically dumped the contents of the bottle on Jake and quickly lathered him up, much to his chagrin. At this point, he's yowling in protest while I rinse off the shampoo. In trying to get his belly, I get soaked in the process. He's still trying to make a break for it and he's still SLIPPERY. I finally rinse off all the shampoo and grab the towel to dry him off. He is giving me the death stare. I dried him as effectively as I could, stripped off my wet clothes and called it done.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the story of Jake's bath.

The Bus Driver

A Thanksgiving Miracle

2010-12-05T20:12:00.001-08:00

Just when we are gearing up for the holidays, the unimaginable happens.

A child, injured by the school bus, having fallen under the rear wheels.

People scrambling to find out what happened.

Fingers are starting to point.

Did he push her?

Did she play around?

Is it the bus drivers fault?

Video shows the drama unfolding.

People stare in disbelief that this could happen to anyone at one of the safest places around, school.

Tears are shed, prayers sent up, as the child is loaded into the ambulance and whisked away by helicopter life flight.

Radio silence.

Uncertainty.

Is this happening?

Is it real?

The questions start to come flooding in.

More prayers.

What will happen to the bus driver?

Will it ever return to normal?

A Thanksgiving Miracle occurs and the 15 year old girl is OK.

She suffers only internal bruising and is sent home for the holiday.

Things change at the High School forever.

*************************

This really happened.

Stay Safe, Arrive Alive,

The Bus Driver.

A little story about L-O-V-E.

2010-11-11T19:56:00.000-08:00

Stupid attends a local community college and is currently trying to obtain his GED. There is nothing wrong with going for higher education, but he is doing this between getting high on drugs and drunk off alcohol all while cultivating his own little love triangle. Not exactly the "higher" education I would have chosen. Stupid currently has two children by two different mothers in two different states. Stupid has a third girlfriend who is an off again on again smoker and who also antagonizes Stupid.

I get the pleasure of interacting with Stupid on a weekly basis as he rides transit to and from school. Stupid has an anger problem as well and has tried to put his fist through a cement pillar. I have news for everyone, the pillar won that battle. I also transport another lady to and from the college. She is smart and has a good head on her shoulders and a goal in life.

Anyhow, every day there is a different story about how one babymama doesn't like Stupid or about how the other babymama is preventing him from seeing his child. Apparently his lack of brain cells hasn't figured out that the two women likely realize that Stupid will never provide for his children, so they have found other people to provide for the children. So to complete this love triangle, he picks up a girlfriend at the college. They seem to have an argument at every turn, usually involving her quitting smoking and him "catching" her lying about quitting.

One of the early exchanges we had about this new "girlfriend" of his went as follows:

Stupid: Ms BusDriver, Me and girlfriend had a fight and we broke up.

Me: Aw, Sorry to hear that. (trying to sound indifferent)

Stupid: Yeah it just hurts, I really don't want to lose this one. I love this one too much.

Me: Aww that's too bad, how long have you been together?

Stupid: (while he counts on his fingers) Ummmmmm 6 days?

Yes ladies and gentlemen... this man is up for grabs!

Fast forward to last week when he boarded the bus and told me that the 6 day relationship was officially over. He was lamenting on how he wished it would work out and how he now has to find another girlfriend. I'm giving him the usual non committal "mmmhmm's and yeah?'s" when from the back, the other client (who has also been listening to Stupid constantly) speaks up with:

Client: Have you ever thought about being single for a while?

Smart Women for the WIN!

The Bus Driver

Rock, Paper, Scissors .... Tornado?!

2010-09-17T20:41:00.000-07:00

Its been a whirlwind month and a half back at work and we are still going full speed ahead. We are so shorthanded, its hard to get any breathing room! This blog will be long, so bear with me!

One thing I've noticed is that children respond very well to praise for positive behavior. I've taken to asking for a volunteer every morning to check the bus for sleeping children and making sure everyone is awake and gets off the bus. This is usually at the elementary school, and most of those kids LOVE to get picked to do a job. I also make it a point to thank them and point them out to the teacher on duty so that they may get some public praise. They soak it up!

Parents are also out in full force. Just today, I had two separate parents tell me how they don't understand why the bus goes two different directions. Unfortunately, this particular bus does not have a regular consistent driver and is at the mercy of substitutes. One parent wants the bus to do it one way, the other parent can't seem to be satisfied no matter what we do. Listen people, if you have a problem with the bus, get in your fancy schmancy little car and drive your happy little butt to the school, wait in line with all the other picky parents and drop off/pick up your own darn child from school. Trust me, we really don't mind that your child won't be riding the bus as your child is probably just as a pain in the butt as you are!

In other parent news, last year, I wrote about a parent who rolled his eyes at me. Well this parent is also back in full force. All last year whenever I drove that bus, he would stand with his arms crossed and his face all red from being mad at me and the bus. I'm not the only driver who experiences his anger either. Another driver told him to get his daughter (high school age) a car, and let HER drive. I wish I had been on the bus that day! Anyhow, I've had the lovely experience of driving that route twice in the last two weeks. The regular bus driver had a field trip both times and was unavailable to drive the bus.

The first time I drove, I ended up getting caught at the railroad tracks for about 10 minutes. It put me behind going to the high school to pick up the final load of children and of course, naturally, made HIS children LATE. Apparently, he called the bus shop, and cussed out the secretaries at the shop for the bus being late with HIS children. I received a call over the CB radio telling me to avoid any interaction with him and to refer him to the big bossman. I had no idea that he had used vile language with the secretaries. He tried to get my attention that day, but I simply ignored him. Unfortunately, due to the train, AND the fact that I do not drive as fast as the regular driver, his children were about 15-20 minutes late. I think they usually get dropped around 3:55-4 pm, where I dropped them about 4:15 that day.

Earlier this week, I drove that bus again and was not held up by a train this time, but had a child who face planted in the aisle (that's another blog!) I wasn't even held up by much anything except children getting off the bus. I still managed to get HIS children home between 4:05 and 4:07. He was as mad as ever. He came to the drivers side window and asked me when I'd be driving the bus again. I told him I didn't know. He then told me that I should call him when I'm driving, because HIS children WON'T be riding when I drive because I'm ALWAYS late. Yep, its MY responsibility to let him know and its MY fault I'm late?!?! Wonderful. I have no intentions of telling him anything and he can take it up with my bossman.

On a lighter note, the following exchange happened between two boys on the bus this afternoon:

Boy1 to Boy2: Let's play Rock, Paper, Scissors!

Boy2: Ok!

Boy1: Ready? Rock, Paper, Scissors!

Boy2: What's that? (staring at Boy1's hand)

Boy1: A tornado!!!! (makes whirling motion with his hand in the shape of a tornado)

Tornado's beat everything!

Whirling around!

The Bus Driver

How to run a successful Field Trip and other news.

2010-08-26T16:53:00.000-07:00

It has been nearly a full three weeks since school started and the children (and bus drivers) are back in full swing. The first week back was actually a really nice change of pace since we have all the elementary students (pre-k through 5th grade) getting off at the same school. Its been working out really well on our end.

That being said, its that season again. The season of fall field trips to pumpkin patches, Halloween parties, and other various fall activities. Here are a few pointers that will help make your field trip run smoothly if you are the coordinator.

1. Make sure you have submitted the proper paperwork to the bus barn/garage in sufficient enough time for the bus barn to secure a driver and bus for the trip. In this paperwork should be the location of pick up, the time of pick up, whether or not lunches are to be picked up/included, and any other essential information such as a destination. Also, you should include a time for drop off back at the school. Keep in mind, most bus drivers have to return in enough time to complete their afternoon routes.

2. When you board the bus at the time of the field trip, make sure you coordinate with the driver and confirm that the driver has the paperwork you submitted stating the destination and times. Make sure you have a roster that has the names of the students you are taking on the trip along with emergency contacts for each student and give a copy to the bus driver. If the bus is in an accident, this roster can be very handy to have.

3. Bring directions. Don't automatically assume that the bus driver knows how to get to all destinations you put on your trip request. Having directions and/or a map printout can be very handy.

4. Preach and practice bus safety. Before you get on the bus with your group of students, go over the bus rules and regulations. This way there is no surprises for children when the bus driver asks them to be quiet at the railroad crossings or tells them to sit properly in the seats. The bus driver may also go over the emergency exits on the bus and explain how to use them at the time of the trip.

5. Meals. Coordinate with the lunchroom if they are going to pack your class bag lunches, or ensure that every student has sufficient money to purchase their own lunch at the destination. Don't forget the bus driver. A simple meal is very much appreciated by many bus drivers especially when we wait on the group as they do the activity. A simple sandwich with fruit and milk can make all the difference and is warmly received.

6. Contact information for the bus driver. Don't hesitate to ask the bus driver for their contact information when you get to a destination. I often provide my cell phone number for teachers/coaches riding my bus that way when the group wants to board the bus again, they have a way of contacting me. Don't assume that the bus driver will stay in one place while your group does the activity. Often activities last longer than 2-3 hours and bus drivers will often go and visit with other bus drivers, shopping, or to a nearby restaurant and may not be readily available at a moments notice. It is a good idea to give us about a 15 minute notice before your group ends the activity, that way we can be ready for you.

7. Be ready for inclement weather. Plan accordingly.

8. Have fun and when in doubt, ask the bus driver.

If you follow these steps, you are likely to have a very successful field trip/activity.

Happy tripping!

The Bus Driver

It's so hot.....

2010-07-31T09:21:00.000-07:00

"It's so hot ... you could fry an egg and bake a biscuit!" - Lady on transit this morning.

On that note, summer is drawing to a close and we are full speed ahead on track for the first day of school. Our first day is August 9 and we are looking at some changes in the upcoming school year. Last year I blogged about our Pre-Kindergarten students being bussed from their primary school to their proper zoned schools. It all evened out in the end and the kids settled in nicely to their zoned schools. We also didn't seem to have as much trouble with parents as the year progressed and we were firm with the changes that we had put in place. Kids rarely got on the wrong bus, or transferred out of zone. We did have a few parents try to skirt the system by lying to the bus driver, or transporting their child to another bus route's stop, but I expect as years pass, those will become fewer and fewer.

One of the big changes this year is the integration of Pre-Kindergarten into the K-5 configuration. In previous years, the Pre-K was in their own school separate from the rest of the grades. This year, all elementary kids will be getting off at the same school and our schools will become Pre-k - 5 configuration. It is supposed to cut down on fuel use by the buses, but I also hope it will reduce the confusion of where each child is supposed to go at the end of the school day. It will also reduce the anxiety of our pre-k kids who surprisingly adjusted well last year to being bussed to different schools, but now won't have to go through that.

As always, stay safe on the roads and watch out for children!

The Bus Driver

Do you have a stretcher?

2010-07-06T21:12:00.000-07:00

I might need one after this holiday weekend. A majority of the weekend was relatively uneventful and downright predictable, except for Stretcher Granny. My last pick up of the day on the Fourth of July was a one-way trip from a nursing home to a local address about 15-20 minutes away. Being it was the holiday, I figured it was grandma going home for a short stay with family during the holiday. Ordinarily, we do these runs all the time, one-way, round-trip etc.

I should have known this run was not going to be anything but ordinary when I walked into the nursing home to inquire about the individual and the nurse on duty looked me in the eye and deadpanned, "Do you have a stretcher?" Yes, you read that right. A stretcher. Our typical response is, "No, we do not have a stretcher. We are not an ambulance service. We are simply transport." Someone then spoke to the nurse and then the nurse said to me, "Oh I guess they're going to put her in a wheelchair instead."

I figure, "Sure, I've dealt with a lot of wheelchair patients before, why is this one any different?" It was. They wheel Stretcher Granny out in a wheelchair and the first thing I notice is her awkward position in the wheelchair almost like she can't sit upright in the chair. Her head is resting on the CNA pushing the wheelchair. When the CNA backs up a little bit and her head is off the CNA, it is hanging there practically bobbing up and down and side to side. I ask, "Can she support herself?" The answer is, "No."

I should have refused transport right then and there, but I plugged on. We get Stretcher Granny in the bus and I'm securing the chair and setting up the seat belt mechanism in order to help prevent Stretcher Granny from slipping any further than she is already. Her son and daughter-in-law reposition her a couple times, scooting her up in the chair so she is not sliding down as much. The CNA returns with pillows which they place under her head on the seat propped up against the bus wall. I cinch the seat belt down and ask the family if they think it is secure enough. Then I let the daughter-in-law know that I will drive gently and slowly so as not to jar Stretcher Granny. Also I requested she remain standing to help support Granny. Stretcher Granny is moaning and complaining by now and we haven't even left the parking lot yet.

The ride over to the house is uneventful and I make small talk, all the while holding my phone ready to dial 911 if Stretcher Granny shows any signs of slippage. In transit, I discover there is no ramp to wheel Stretcher Granny up to the house, only stairs. We arrive and I position the bus to let the ramp down by the back patio which has 3 steps about 2 inches high each, so they were very shallow steps. The ramp won't reach to the patio without the door being blocked. Not wanting to get any closer to the air conditioner, I decide to let Stretcher Granny down as close to the steps as possible. As I'm unhooking her, the urine bag had fallen on the floor of the bus (YUCK!) and fearing the family would move her before it was secure again, I did mention it and the family fixed it. The daughter-in-law says to the son, "Next time we're calling an ambulance!" and he says completely oblivious, "Was it that bad?"

Because I was so close to the house and the steps, there was a thorn bush right by where I had to stand to let the lift down. As such, I managed to get trapped between the thorns and the lift resulting in a few nice thorns to my butt while I'm trying to maneuver Stretcher Granny onto the lift. I had decided since we were close enough to the steps, that we should back her on to the lift and let her down backwards, but this meant her head would not be supported. Luckily her son was tall enough that he supported her head on the way down. In order to get her off the lift and release me from any liability in this case, she had to be bumped up the steps. So, I helped her son bump Stretcher Granny up the steps so they could get her in the house. (We technically are not supposed to do lifting, but because I simply wanted to get the heck out of there, I did.)

Stretcher Granny's son asks me how to pay and I explain that he can go ahead and pay the 6 dollar fee now. He hands me a 10 and asks for change. I oblige and he walks away without so much as giving a tip. We don't expect tips, but mind you, its a holiday weekend, I got Stretcher Granny home under extenuating circumstances, I helped bump her up the steps, I went above and beyond what we do in normal circumstances and the guy is a complete jackass! I'm sorry that your 6 dollars didn't buy you a 600 dollar ambulance ride. That's what you get for being a cheap jerk.

Worthy of my 100th post?

The Bus Driver

Boys are so GROSS!

2010-06-28T16:55:00.000-07:00

Ok, so the title makes me sound like a juvenile girl, but you really haven't lived until you are driving a bus that is packed with a boys team of some sort. Football, soccer, baseball, basketball, etc. When they first get on the bus, they smell normal. But after the game is over, they STINK! It gets worse when the weather is hot and I become eternally grateful that ALL the windows are open and the fans are blowing on me, moving the stinky air to the rest of the bus.

So this summer, being a glutton for punishment, I signed up to drive summer field trips on our buses which do not have air conditioning. Besides being incredibly hot, this intensifies any smell to a point where even the offender's team mates take notice. Recently I drove a group of baseball players and when they boarded the bus, the following conversation occurred:

Player 1 - Dude your shirt STINKS!

Player 2 - I didn't play last game so I didn't think it would smell bad and I didn't wash it.

Player 1 - Dude you should ALWAYS wash your shirts! That's just nasty! Player 3 smell player 1's shirt.

Player 3 - (after taking a big sniff) Ew that reeks!

Player 1 - It's player 2's shirt.

Player 2 - I don't think it smells.

The rest of the team - EW gross dude!

The wonderful teenage mind.

Grossed out!

The Bus Driver

The Impact on a Child's Life

2010-05-28T19:26:00.000-07:00

In my previous entry, I wrote about the prank I played on some unsuspecting 7th grade band members. I had the same group two days later and had about five of them ask, "Where's the frog?" It got me thinking about the influence each of us has on children. Sometimes, if I'm facing a particular behavior problem, I have to take a step back and be the bigger person in the situation.

It may be that the child's life may NOT be the best thing ever. They may have to go home and be responsible for their little siblings - at 6-9 years old! Mom or dad may not be existent in the home. They may be in jail, selling drugs, or any other number of things. I drove a certain bus once and jokingly told the kids they'd better be good or I'd call their mommas and daddies. The overwhelming response I got from the kids was, "My (parent of choice) is in jail/prison - They're getting out in XX months/years." It completely threw me off guard and made me realize that some of these kids have a hard life.

Many of our children go home hungry and don't eat anything until the next day at school. Many communities are implementing summer lunch programs because these children would go hungry if there was nothing available. Many children bring their younger siblings and make sure that they get enough to eat before they eat.

Their school life might not be the best thing either. Their teacher might be awful. Their teacher might yell, scream, keep them in for recess, send them to the principal's office. They might face numerous discipline consequences through the school. Sure their behavior sometimes warrants these consequences, but to add a bus conduct offense on top of it probably gets discouraging.

Most behavior problems I can manage on the bus without school intervention. Often these kids are just starved for attention. I've had several kids come up to me to give me a hug and receive one in return even if I'm not driving their bus that day. They're quick to show me their accomplishments. I praise them and they soak it up. I high five the kids or fist bump the teens. I sing silly songs with the pre-k kids and also some of the older ones who are embarrassed at first, but then get into the fun. Sometimes I pull tricks out of my proverbial hat with items on hand.

I was faced with the scary prospect of entertaining/controlling 8 pre-k kids on one bus one afternoon. Our pre-k is located across town and while all the buses transport their kids there in the morning, in the afternoon those same kids board 1 of 2 buses, marked with a red or green dot and go to their respective elementary schools to meet their buses. They label the kids with white name/bus number labels and a red or green dot sticker on the label. I peeled off the sticker on one of the tags and stuck it on my nose and waited for the kids to notice. They howled in laughter when they saw I was being silly, then they all begged me to have a "nose" like mine. Ever since then, whenever I'm on that bus, they want a "nose".

If its one thing I keep in mind it is that we all have an impact on the lives of children no matter how old they are. So, for that 10-45 minutes they are on MY bus, if I can bring just a little happiness to their lives, then I've done my job.

Spreading happiness everywhere!

The Bus Driver

Random Ramblings and a Drunk Guy on a Bike

2010-05-24T20:13:00.000-07:00

We are barreling towards the end of the school year. With our last day being June 4, the schools have all decided to have endless field trips. Most are rewards for good behavior - bowling, the movie theater, skating, "fun zone" - but a good portion of them are 5th grade field trips or middle school band trips. The 5th grade field trips are basically taking those kids who will be moving up to 6th (and entering middle school) to their respective new middle schools for tours and a mini orientation of what to expect when they get there next year. The band trips are for the middle school band to recruit new kids from the 5th grade who might actually want to do band all through MS and into HS.

These trips are rather boring and uneventful. But there have been a few highlights. First I took kids bowling for the 6th or 8th or 100th time this year, and when I walk into Denny's (attached to the bowling alley) the staff at Denny's greets me with "Who did ya bring this time?" - That's a good thing right????? Secondly, on my mini band trip today, I found a plastic realistic looking frog on the dashboard of the bus I borrowed. I placed the frog on the white part of the steps facing me so the kids would see it as they stepped up onto the bus. I managed to prank every kid that got on the bus! Lastly, I've gone to the beach several times over the last three weeks and had a couple teachers compliment me on how well I maneuver the bus through the trees in some tight parking areas close to the beach.

In other news, there is no shortage of entertainment. From a girl who shot me the middle finger while I was driving a route and was blocking the street she wanted to drive down to "Cousin It" emo kid who has his hair cut in such a way that he can't see two feet in front of him. You know the type of kids I'm talking about. Additionally, to add insult to injury, the kid insists on wearing a hat, thereby sealing in his blindness to how stupid he looks.

By far the best entertainment I've had all year actually happened to a friend of mine who also drives a bus. Just recently, she was driving down the road on the way to complete her route when a man on a bicycle was pedaling towards her in her lane. She slowed the bus to a stop, and watched this guy. Apparently he had a broken leg, and his crutches were propped up on the bicycle. He was also drunk as heck. He wobbled down the road towards my friend and went to go avoid the bus, but his crutches must have hit part of the bus because all of a sudden he loses control and takes a tumble into a ditch. She was worried about him because he didn't move for a while, so she thought he was really injured (apparently it was quite a tumble). Anyhow, he finally moves, stands up, salutes the bus, and topples back over again into the ditch. By now, the kids and her are HOWLING with laughter. I only wish I had been riding on her bus that afternoon. The police came and ended up arresting him for intoxication, but not before he gave the bus a good show.

7 and a half more days left!!!

The Bus Driver

Color for the Cure!

2010-05-01T20:48:00.000-07:00

One of the hair salons local to me held a fundraiser today. They teamed up with Relay for Life (the official American Cancer Society fundraiser) and told folks that if they paid 20 dollars, they could get a streak of either purple or pink in their hair for cancer awareness. (Purple is the Relay for Life color and pink signifies breast cancer awareness.) The proceeds from the hair coloring went directly to Relay for Life.

I now have a pink streak in my hair :)

I encourage anyone who believes in the cause to suggest this to their local hair salons and see if they will also sponsor Relay for Life.

Hoping for a Cure!

The Bus Driver

Response to an Anonymous Comment

2010-04-25T14:52:00.000-07:00

First off, I sincerely apologize for not blogging more. Both jobs have kept me rather busy averaging about 60-70 hours a week between the two, so time for posting has not been in the schedule. I do have a couple good blogs planned for the future though.

Secondly, I have had this comment sitting in my moderation area for quite some time, I had intended to make a blog of it and simply haven't had the time. So, without further adieu, here it is:

Anonymous wrote: Not sure if I can comment without registering, but wanted to say that not all bus drivers are good ones either. Tell me what exactly a 2nd or 3rd grader could possible do to warrant a driver yelling at them every single day so loudly that it makes their ears pop? You bring up major offenses that must be being committed by teenagers or something, but my kids do little stuff like peek out the window to see if where they are is their stop or not. Some kid will have his foot in the aisle. They're yelled at to SIT DOWN as soon as they enter the bus, even if they're bewildered as to where to sit. 7 year olds, after all, are not the must "with it" crowd, yet. I think that it's great everything is recorded so I can prove that my kids' driver is acting like a maniac. She doesn't ever inform me that they are misbehaving or anything like that. I think it should be her job to inform a parent of misbehavior before she assumes that she can yell, scream, mimic, or mock their children. In a lot of cases, children are the victims of the abuse that adults can dish out and if you can't handle a 1st to 5th grader without having to resort to abusive tactics like YELLING over a PA system, for God's sake, then find another line of work, please.

Yes Anonymous, some people are just not cut out to drive a bus. Abusive adult behavior towards children should not be tolerated. However yelling seems to be your main concern. Often elementary children are loud and chaotic. They have not learned how to control their voices and speak in a manner that is appropriate for all situations. A bus is a 40 foot tube with seats and a steering wheel. Even with the windows open, the noise gets very loud inside and often the driver needs to raise their voice to even be heard.

You say it should be our job to tell you if your child is misbehaving on the bus BEFORE we yell at them/correct the behavior on the bus. So does that mean that I should wait to tell little Johnny to put his body back inside the bus and instead pull up to your stop with little Johnny hanging halfway out the window so you can see that he is misbehaving? I'm being sarcastic here, but the reality is, if I see a child doing something that is putting themselves or others in danger, I'm not going to wait until I see a parent at the bus stop (most parents don't stand at the stop in the first place) before I handle it on the bus or take it to a school administrator for disciplinary actions.

Student behavior problems are the number one concern on a bus. Simply put, a teacher has 30 children in FRONT of them, a parent has 1-5 children on average, a bus driver has upwards of 60 children BEHIND them. We hold bus safety classes for grades pre-k through 5 every year at the beginning of each year. During these classes, we teach children the emergency exits, the proper way to sit on a bus and the proper way to behave on a bus. Part of the reinforcement for these skills comes from parents. Teach your children that the bus is just like a car, they need to sit in the seat and stay seated. They need to realize that even though a bus does not have seat belts like a car, that it is a vehicle and deserves the same respect. You wouldn't let your child stand up in the rear of the vehicle would you? You would likely yell at them to sit down and buckle up. I don't like to raise my voice to be heard, but if it means they will stop, think, and listen to me, then I do what I have to do.

Chugging Along,

The Bus Driver

Words that have Two Meanings and Milk Lady Strikes Again

2010-03-24T18:59:00.000-07:00

Recently, I had the pleasure of meeting up with a very good friend. She has three very adorable and personable children and we spent the day in the sun on the beach. HyperGirl, her middle child, is aptly named as she is incredibly hyper ALL. THE. TIME. The kid just never stops moving! Our conversations usually happened like this:

HyperGirl: Miss Bus Driver! Miss Bus Driver! Miss Bus Driver! Miss Bus Driver! Miss Bus Driver! Miss Bus Driver! Miss Bus Driver! Miss Bus Driver! Miss Bus Driver! Miss Bus Driver! Miss Bus Driver!

Me: What?

HyperGirl: I'm Annoying!!!

Then dissolving into fits of laughter in the backseat.

But, one particular conversation stands out among all interactions I had with this child.

HyperGirl: I like this car, is it new?

Me: Yes it is new.

HyperGirl: Oh really? When did you get it?

Me: I got it after my Accident.

HyperGirl: (trying to sound sympathetic) Oh well, thats ok, I still have accidents too... I wet the bed sometimes!

Her mother and I couldn't help but laugh.

*********************************************************

In other news, I transported Milk Lady to Walmart recently. I had her on my list on other days, but she had simply not materialized. It was another rainy day and I pulled up to her apartment to see her door propped open. This was a sure sign that she was going to go. I also had a witness in the bus, a lady from the office who was hitching a ride to the maintenance shop to pick up a bus that had been serviced. As we pulled up to the apartment, the lady from the office mentioned to me that she was going to simply sit back and watch how Milk Lady treated me as a driver. I nodded and waited.

Milk Lady appeared at the doorway and called out to the bus, "Are you going to close my door for me?" I responded back politely with, "No ma'am I'm not allowed." She started to call me a liar and then thought better of it, opened her mailbox right outside her door and pulled out this blue dog leash thingy. It looks like a dog leash with the collar hook snipped off. She uses it to close the door when she is by herself. She holds it up and calls out to me, " THIS is NOT a DOG LEASH, it is a LEG STRAP." Apparently she was clarifying my misnomer. I had called it a dog leash on that fateful Saturday.

I nodded and smiled, and said, "OK" then proceeded to let down the lift. Milk Lady then made this HUGE production of asking her neighbor to close her door for her complete with hand gestures pointing out the EVIL transit lady who won't help a poor innocent handicapped person. She finally makes her way to the lift and I make small talk:

Me: So they finally put in a ramp for you in the sidewalk, it looks nice.

Milk Lady: I would PREFER if you didn't TALK to me.

I get the lift level with the bus, and she rolls herself in. At this point she sees the office lady and turns all sickeningly sweet as I'm securing her chair and says:

Milk Lady: OfficeLady, YOU would have shut my door for me RIGHT???

OfficeLady: I'm sorry, but its against our policy.

BUS DRIVER AND OFFICE LADY FOR THE WIN!!!!!!!!!!!

As soon as she heard that, she shut up and was silent and giving both of us the evil eye throughout the transport. We transported her to Walmart with no further complications, though she did ask if I was going to be the one to pick her up. When I replied negatively, she made this big production and said "Well thank GOD, I don't have to deal with you again!!!"

When she finally rolled off the lift at Walmart, I wished her a nice day, then sat back in the drivers seat. The office lady broke the silence by saying, "Well you could cut that tension with a knife!"

Eating Cookies... with Milk,

The Bus Driver

"Joe" Goes Missing and More False Teeth.

2010-03-02T14:47:00.000-08:00

Miss Elderly is back on the bus again and there is no shortage of quotes from this lady.

Miss Elderly: Miss Bus Driver, I can't believe you told your momma about my false teeth that day!!

Me: Oh Really? I tell my mother just about everything!

Miss Elderly: Well I told my daughter that you told your momma what I said about my false teeth, and SHE told me I deserved it because I flap my gums too much!

Me: (laughing)

Miss Elderly: (continues) Well I can't help it if I take them out, I'm sure false teeth annoy everyone else as much as they annoy me!!

Me: ...........

**********************************

So the conversation then turns to snakes, spiders, and other creepy crawly hopping things. Miss Elderly is regaling me with tales of snakes trying to get inside the house and how she simply doesn't like anything that slithers and crawls.

Miss Elderly: This one day in my room, there was a spider in the corner, and I stared at it and it stared back at me and I hollered to my daughter that she better come and do something about it because I told her that one of us was gonna HAVE to go!!

Me: (falling over with laughter)

**********************************

Later on the bus, I had a few kids who came up with this gem:

Kid1: Getcho feet outta the aisle!

Kid2: Whose Joe?

Kid3: Joe doesn't ride this bus!

Laughing Silly,

The Bus Driver

The Story of Milk Lady - Transit

2010-02-19T11:52:00.000-08:00

****Be forewarned, this blog is long****

As a transit driver, I normally go the extra mile for a client by doing things like opening doors, helping to load some of their groceries, or giving them a hand to help them up or down on the bus. Doing things like this takes only a minimal amount of time and it helps me develop a rapport with repeat clients. Most people who ride transit can handle their own items themselves, but occasionally, I’ll have to hold a purse or a bag for an elderly woman, or fold up the walker of the elderly man who rides.

One of the requests we ask of folks riding transit is that they have exact change for their fare. We often cannot make change and if we have to stop and make change at a convenience store, it’s very inconvenient. Most of our clients adhere to this policy and for the few clients who do not have change for their fare we can usually make change, but those clients typically hand us a 5 dollar bill for a 4 dollar fare, so making change is somewhat easy if all you have is a couple dollars.

The Milk Lady is in a wheelchair and partially paralyzed. She rides transit quite often and can be a handful. She is typically agreeable as long as one doesn’t tell her “No” or says something that can tick her off. She likes to take advantage of situations and play that she can’t do something when she really can. Because of her paralysis, she has limited mobility of her hands. However this limited mobility does not stop her from dialing her cell phone, texting her friends, and any other number of things that she can do with them, but she claims she cannot turn a key in her lock or open her door.

Her apartment complex installed a special handle (elongated, not round) on her door just for her so that she could open and access her apartment. We know that she will regularly leave her apartment by herself, lock the door (it has a twisty lock on the inside) and somehow get back in by herself after her trip down the street to K-Mart or Burger King.

The Milk Lady’s story begins on a Tuesday afternoon. She had ridden transit over to our local Wal-Mart. She usually never has exact change and asked the first driver to change out a 20-dollar bill. The first driver did not have the change and told her to simply get change at Wal-Mart and pay me for the full fare when I picked her up. Her full round trip fare was a whopping 4 dollars. It was a dreary rainy Tuesday when I pulled up to pick her up. The first thing I asked her was if she had exact change for the fare. She looked me straight in the face and said, “Yes”. She had a cartload of groceries (milk, yogurt, and a few other things). I loaded the groceries on the bus and then got her loaded and secured in the bus. She really should have an aide with her when she shops to handle all the groceries she gets, but she expects others to simply drop what they’re doing and do it for her.

I get in the drivers seat and am watching her fumble around in her purse, and she asks me, “Do you have change for a 5?” My incredulous response, “YOU told ME you had exact change. YOU were JUST at Wal-Mart where you KNEW you would have to have exact change for the fare. NO I do NOT have change for a 5.” Now, I don’t know if she had forgotten to get change, but she kept coming up with excuse after excuse as to why she didn’t have change. Then she turns it on me and says, “How come you guys don’t carry change? YOU should carry change for ME!” Again, I reiterated that she was just at Wal-Mart and that she had every opportunity to get change. She asked if I could simply “credit” her account the 1-dollar towards her next ride. I explained that we don’t usually do that, and she begged me to call my supervisor. I did, and it was approved for this ONE time only. In past trips, she has always had a 20-dollar bill and I’ve ALWAYS had to stop somewhere to get it changed out. In fact, on one of these stops to change a bill, she remarked “Oh I need to stop doing this, I need to carry change on me.” She is very manipulative.

We leave Wal-Mart parking lot and pull up at her apartment. In past trips she has asked me to unlock the door for her and push it open so she can get in and in past trips I have obliged, going the extra mile. This time there was the added complication of groceries. Since it was raining, I didn’t feel that I should put the groceries on the sidewalk to let them get wet, so I thought I’d be extra polite and bring them just inside to the kitchen. Her kitchen is located just to the left of the front door of the apartment, so it was not a far stretch to simply put the items on the floor in front of the refrigerator in the kitchen.

Next thing I know, she BLOCKS the exit with her chair (she is not a super small woman, and neither am I) and proceeds to ask me if I can put her milk away in the refrigerator. Our exchange goes like this:

Milk Lady (blocking the door and effectively trapping me in the kitchen): Can you put my milk in the fridge for me?

Me: I’m sorry I can’t help you, I have another pick up, and I need to get going now.

Milk Lady (still blocking the door): Why can’t you? Its just right there!”

Me: I’m sorry, but I can’t. Now please let me out so I can go do another pick up, I’m going to be late if I don’t get out now.

Milk Lady: I just don’t see why you can’t help me and put my milk away. Its in its own bag, you wouldn’t have to take it out of the bag, just put it in the fridge.

Me (getting exasperated): I’m sorry, but I really CAN’T, now please move aside so I can get out and on my way.

Milk Lady (rolling into her apartment in a huff): How rude is that! Someone who can’t even help a handicapped person! I guess my milk will spoil!

Me (slamming the door):…..

Milk Lady (trying to call me back inside):……….

By this time I was late by 5 minutes to my next pick up, and late getting to my primary job (school bus) that afternoon. All I could think about after the exchange was the story “If You give a Mouse a Cookie”. I called my supervisor to let her know I was running late and what had happened regarding the milk. Shortly after that, Milk Lady called the office complaining about me not putting her milk away and about how I was rude and disrespectful. I made the decision right then and there to NEVER go out of my way for her again. If she has groceries, they get deposited on the sidewalk outside her apartment. I’m not going to unlock and open the door for her anymore. She has taken advantage of me one too many times.

Fast forward to Saturday when she shows up on my list again. This time, going out to her boyfriend’s house. Her fare was 6 dollars round trip, but I subtracted the one dollar credit she had, so her fare turned out to be only 5 dollars. I pulled up to her apartment and her aide comes to the door. I call out and tell the aide to make sure that Milk Lady could get back inside her apartment by herself. When Milk Lady finally appears I tell her in no short order that I’m not going to unlock the door for her anymore and that she had better be able to get back into the apartment without my help. She becomes indignant and asks why the sudden change of heart. I explained to her that after Tuesday’s incident, there would be no more help.

She was visibly angry at me and started to berate me about how I was heartless for not helping a handicapped woman. I told her that I’d simply call my supervisor and my supervisor would tell me not to even take her anywhere, and just leave. She stopped for about a minute, just long enough for me to get her on the lift and start moving the lift up. About half way up she turns and looks at me and says, “Your attitude is just like your face!” I finished moving the lift up to the bus level and stated, “Thank you for the compliment!” She was speechless, and then proceeded to whip out her cell phone and call her boyfriend and advise him that I’m so heartless and that I don’t care about handicapped people. She also called me “that FAT transit lady.” She was loud enough that I had to listen to her for the entire 20-minute ride out to her boyfriend’s house. I simply let her off and told her of the return time.

On the return trip, she confirmed that I wouldn’t open the door for her back at her apartment. I simply told her that I wasn’t allowed. I should have known that would set her off. Again she angrily dialed her boyfriend or other friends and claimed I was being mean and heartless to her. Then she demanded to know who told me I wasn’t allowed to open the door for her anymore. I did not justify that with an answer, so she exclaimed that she was going to call the big boss man and demand answers. Basically she was threatening me to see if I would cave and give in to her demands. Then we had the following exchange:

Milk Lady (rather haughtily): Well YOU wont have to worry about seeing ME on your bus again!

Me (politely): Oh, do you mean me personally or transit in general?

Milk Lady: YOU personally!

Me (still politely): So would you like to cancel for tomorrow morning too, since I have you on my list?

Milk Lady (still rude): No, well you can pick me up for tomorrow, but no more after that.

Me: Ok.

I dropped her off and then called my boss man to advise him of the situation that was happening. I told him exactly what had happened, how she had insulted me and what I said to her in return. Sunday morning, she called me and told me she was canceling her ride. Cry me a river.

A few days ago, she called up and asked for a ride again on Saturday. She also requested that I not be the one to pick her up. The scheduling lady told her flat out that we don’t accept requests; you get who you get, and either you go or you stay home. Milk Lady tried to be rude and got told that she will not disrespect the transit drivers again. Go office secretary lady!

So as of right now, I haven’t had to pick her up since the last Saturday exchange. It will be interesting to see what this weekend brings!

Being Very Patient,

The Bus Driver

Sunday Hats and Strange Offers - Transit

2010-02-06T17:32:00.000-08:00

Well, it has been a while since I've updated simply due to the increase in work from both jobs. I've been working the weekends mainly at transit and have a few upcoming field trips that I'm definitely looking forward to.

Almost every Sunday, I have the pleasure of transporting an elderly black baptist lady (Hat Lady) over to her church in a nearby town about a 15 minute ride. She is in a wheelchair and has no mobility and resides in a nursing home, but she faithfully goes to church every Sunday when she is in good health. Every Sunday that she does go to church, she dresses up and puts on a hat. Yes, true southern baptist HATS. Its a surprise every Sunday which hat she wears. They range in color from traditional white, black, and blue, to as extravagant as red and animal prints. Naturally, her outfit always matches her hat.

I call my mother most every Sunday to give her the "Hat Report". Last Sunday, she wore a leopard print hat and had the matching jacket to go with it. Unfortunately this Sunday, I'll be transporting Negative Ned over to his storage buildings in order for him to load up the bus with junk to haul back to town.

In transit, I come across a lot of strange characters and receive a lot of requests from folks who don't want to pay the extra money for a service like stopping at a Burger King to procure lunch. Often times these folks will offer to pay for my meal, or offer me a drink or a small tip in return for providing the extra stop. Usually, I am not allowed to stop anywhere that is not designated on transit on our schedules, but occasionally, I have to make exceptions. Most of the exceptions come when folks do not have exact change for the ride, so I simply stop at a convenience store nearby, change out the money, and quickly get underway. Other times, if I have to wait an extended period of time for a person at a destination out of town, I will take the bus to the nearest restaurant and get refreshment for myself. Other requests that I receive are typically requests for help such as opening a door for a handicapped person, or quickly running into a building for a person that cannot physically do it. I'm usually willing to oblige these requests, as it simply makes my life and the other persons life easier.

Funeral Faith is a lady I've transported to a viewing at a funeral home as well as a couple of her family functions. Her morbid name comes from the fact that her son (Funeral Frank) owns a part of a local funeral home. Her family is very warm and welcoming. There is always a family member who rides the bus with Faith to whatever the function is. During one of the last transports, Funeral Frank rode the bus with her. We got to talking and he revealed that he was part owner to a local funeral home. Then he proceeded to give me the strangest offer I have received to date. He has offered me a free tour of the Funeral Home.

Yes, a Funeral Home.

I didn't know how to respond to it, so I simply thanked him for his generous offer, and told him I'd consider it. Inside I was screaming, "EEK Dead Bodies!!! RUN AWAY!!!"

Going to an Early Grave,

The Bus Driver

Overheard - Two for the Price of One

2010-01-22T19:07:00.000-08:00

Today was a fun filled day of circuses and bowling. Both unrelated trips, but both producing their equivalent of hyperactive excitable children. A large group of Pre-K babies got to go see the circus at a local venue. Of course this morning, most of the babies were already hyped up for the field trip and really excited. This of course left them on a permanent sugar buzz from all the cotton candy, sugar, and excitement throughout the day of lions, tigers, and bears - Oh My! This little gem came from the afternoon route.

I often have the opportunity to sit and listen to Pre-K babies interact with each other while waiting for the larger kids to come out of their school. Often these children love to "tattle" on each other and most simply call me "Ms. Bus Driver". This exchange happened today while waiting:

Pre-K Girl 1: Ms. RegularDriversName! Ms. RegularDriversName! Ms. RegularDriversName!

Pre-K Girl 2(to #1): Ms. RegularDriversName is not here today!

Pre-K Girl 1(with attitude): So,she can change her name to Ms. RegularDriversName.

Apparently according to Girl 1 - I can magically change my name at will! AMAZING!

**************************************************

I did not get to go to the circus. I did get to take the 7th graders bowling. This trip was a reward for good behavior. As always with trips, lots of random and unexplainable things happen. This happened on the bus en route to the bowling alley:

7th Grade Boy(standing up randomly): When I say Hillshire!, You say Farm!

7th Grade Boy(continuing after a pause): HILLSHIRE!

Whole Bus(including myself and the teachers): FARM! GO MEAT!

Complete with pumping arms in air victoriously.

Yes. It was a good ride.

The Bus Driver

Overheard - Transit Edition

2010-01-16T15:55:00.000-08:00

Driving an elderly woman home.

Miss Elderly: Miss Bus Driver, You know what I'm gonna do when I get home?

Me: No, what are you going to do.

Miss Elderly: Well, first I'm going to take out my false teeth, then I'm gonna cut my TV on, then I'm gonna strip.

Me: .........

I won't tell if you won't!

2010-01-11T20:45:00.000-08:00

After a long winter break, I've compiled a list of things I've learned while working odd hours.

1. Walmart carts roll in the back of a bus when they are not secured.

2. Walmart carts that roll, but are filled with groceries, will NOT tip over, just simply slam into the walls of the bus uninhibited making loud noises.

3. The wheelchair lift will malfunction when you least expect it and at the most inopportune times.

4. When it is raining, the optimal time for loading people that are wheelchair bound is when it is pouring rain. Contrarily, the second you sit in the drivers seat after getting soaked is when the rain will stop.

5. Old people are great!

The fifth item on the list deserves a story.

There once was this old cranky man who lived alone, but traveled somewhere different every day for lunch/breakfast. Well as of recently he has not been taking his daily jaunts into town, so imagine my surprise when he showed up on my schedule one day for transit. I show up at his house, and he hobbles out with a cane and a very large clunky boot on his foot. (Apparently he's had foot surgery of some sort.)

Anyhow, he gets on the bus and after the usual friendly banter, we're off to his destination. About halfway through the ride, he tells me about how he's basically been a prisoner in his own home because he's supposed to be staying there and keeping his leg elevated. He also complains that his daughter is not bringing him all the milk that he wanted to drink. The man is elderly and very set in his ways.

He then informs me that his daughter doesn't know about his lunch trip, but that she'd be in church until noon, and he's "Just GOT to get out of the house!" So I said to him, "I won't tell if you won't! But we gotta get you home before your daughter comes over to find you missing!" He just laughed and grinned. He returned home with a belly full and a very happy demeanor.

Fast forward to later in the week, his daughter called while I was sitting in the office demanding to know if we took her father out to eat over the weekend.

BUSTED!

The Bus Driver

Merry Christmas and Happy New Years

2010-01-01T21:55:00.001-08:00

Hello to EVERYONE out there in Blog land!!!!

I've been largely silent as of recently because I've been working a lot. Hopefully 2010 will have many more stories and anecdotes to share. May your new year be happy healthy and prosperous.

Looking To The Future,

The Bus Driver

Nemo On Ice meets My Car

2009-12-11T18:37:00.000-08:00

November has been a whirlwind month for me. Early in the month, I mentioned that I was going to see Nemo On Ice and that a personal situation was taking up much of my time. Then Thanksgiving happened, I had family come and visit, and as such, have not been able to update as frequently as I'd have liked to.

Nemo On Ice was really cute and very well put together. It basically followed the movie and had some new fun songs. The skaters were really talented and managed some very difficult moves on ice wearing huge fish costumes that would have put me on my butt! The drive up and back was relatively uneventful except the teachers on my bus were questioning every driving decision I made. They were speaking amongst themselves but were quite loud and obnoxious about openly debating why we were taking X road instead of Y road, and how we could be there faster if we had done Y and Z instead of W and X. Part of me wanted to pull the bus over, get up and tell them that they can drive. Then we hit traffic on the way in as always happens when the Civic Center has a huge child friendly production, and they proceeded to complain about THAT! The rest of the trip went without incident.

After driving all day and dealing with grouchy teachers, I was on my way home when a lady ran a stop sign causing me to hit the brakes. Despite all my efforts, we collided. She was traveling so fast that she pulled my car 90 degrees to the right with her momentum, and when we disconnected, I hit a stop sign. It flattened. My airbags did NOT go off and I was miraculously not hurt. My car was deemed a total loss. I couldn't post about it until the issue had completely resolved. RIP 2001 Honda Accord.

Dear Parent Who Rolled His Eyes At Me

2009-11-19T18:31:00.000-08:00

Warning: Rant below. Read at your own Risk!

Dear Impatient Parent,

I'm sorry your children didn't get home until 4:06 pm today. I'm sorry that I was cautious and drove safely out of concern for YOUR children. I'm sorry that the bus I drove today was not fast enough for you. I'm sorry I couldn't get your children home earlier than 4:06 pm. I'm sorry that I don't know the bus route well enough because the regular driver changes the route path often. I'm sorry if I had to deal with constant behavior problems because I am a substitute driver. I'm sorry that the other children on the bus cause delays because precious seconds are wasted when they say good bye or ANOTHER concerned parent stops to talk to me briefly. I'm sorry we had a delay leaving the school on time because of traffic patterns and concerns.

I'm sorry the bus is so packed that I am forced to make two runs just so we can fit all the children on the route on the bus to get home. I'm sorry that my being late by a few minutes has inconvenienced you and forced you to stand at the bus stop for your children a few extra minutes. So excuse me when you roll your eyes and look at your watch and sigh disrespectfully and disdainfully in my direction and when I apologize to your face for the delays, you simply turn away and walk toward your house sighing loudly and glaring at me because I am a safe cautious driver who does not race to get from point A to point B, instead I choose to play it safe for your children and the safety of OTHER peoples children. You are NOT the only parent in the world!

Kindly,

The Bus Driver

Just a Quick Update

2009-11-13T22:26:00.000-08:00

I haven't forgotten about the blog world. As planned, I went and saw Nemo On Ice on November 6. It was a spectacular show which I will detail in a future blog. Be on the look out for new and exciting links as I re-vamp my blogroll and add new links over the next 4 weeks. I am presently going through a personal situation which is taking up most of my time, so bear with me.

Spinning,

The Bus Driver

Question: Proper Loading and Unloading

2009-11-05T19:05:00.000-08:00

A while back, I invited readers to submit their questions to me via my email busdriverquestions@gmail.com. Well today, we have the first of many questions.

Aren't all students, including those in wheelchairs supposed to be ready for pickup and not sitting inside the house waiting for the bus to come? Also those red lights? Aren't they only supposed to go on when the students are actually boarding the bus or unloading the bus? and not while the bus is just sitting there waiting for the student(s) to get to come out of the house and get to the end of the driveway?

Extremely frustrated from NY

Dear Extremely Frustrated,

The general rule of thumb is that all able students should be out at a bus stop 5 to 10 minutes ahead of the scheduled pick-up time. This means that students who ride the regular education buses should be ready and waiting for the bus to get them. The only exception to this rule is in inclement weather where a child may wait in a garage or at the door ready to dash (run or walk quickly) out to the bus when it pulls up.

As for wheelchair students and special education students, these students typically get door-to-door service from the local bus company and usually a bus will pull into the driveway of the student who needs services. These buses are typically smaller than a 40-foot bus. However, I have seen buses that are the size of a regular education bus, but are equipped with a wheelchair lift. A lot of special education students need far more supervision than is given at a traditional bus stop, therefore it does take a little more time to load and unload these students, usually 5-10 minutes, due to their special needs.

The flashing yellow and red lights should be activated anytime a bus is stopped on a roadway for the purpose of loading and unloading students. This is for the safety of all motorists and students standing at the stop. Typical times for any given bus stop vary from 30 seconds to 3 minutes, depending on circumstances. If you feel a bus driver is taking an exceptionally long time at a stop because a child is not ready at the stop, you can call the local bus garage for your area and report the situation. Otherwise, I encourage you to be patient, the child may have forgotten something and had to run back to the house to get it, or there could be other extenuating circumstances that would prolong a wait at a stop.

We understand that you are just as busy as we are and need to get places just like we do, but we do appreciate your understanding. We do our best not to hold up traffic on main roads so as not to impede the flow of traffic, but unfortunately it does happen occasionally.

Activating The Lights,

The Bus Driver

Calling all Trivia Buffs!

2009-11-05T13:55:00.000-08:00

A fellow bus driver has started a trivia contest for each of her schools on her route. She is having trouble coming up with questions that are appropriate for each age group. The age groups on the bus range from pre-k to high school. The age group splits are as follows - pre-k thru 2nd grade, 3rd-5th grade, 6-8th grade, and 9th -12th grade. I invite my readers to submit their trivia questions along with an answer to busdriverquestions@gmail.com, or simply leave a comment tagged to this post. Please also designate the intended age group for the question.

The two current questions we've had for the kids are:

Kindergarten thru 5th grade for this one -
Question: Name the biggest state EAST of the Mississippi. Answer: Georgia

and

Middle School (6-8)
Question: Make at least 4 comparisons between John F. Kennedy, and Abraham Lincoln.

Answer:
JFK and Lincoln were both assassinated by men with three names. (Lee Harvey Oswald and John Wilkes Booth)

JFK died in a Ford, Lincoln died in Ford's Theater.

etc etc etc.

Questioningly Yours,

The Bus Driver

Its the GREAT PUMPKIN!

2009-11-01T07:05:00.001-08:00

This was sent to me by my mother, who received it in an email from her Chiropractor.

Halloween is a joyous occasion filled with adventure, excitement, ghouls and goblins, as well as the ingestion of sugary sweets and candy.

While most will agree occasionally snacking on small amounts of these treats is acceptable, excessive amounts of Kit Kats and peanut butter cups may become more readily available this time of year leading to over indulgence.

Such foods with a high glycemic index (i.e.: candy/soda) can have a dramatic affect on immunity. In fact, there is enough sugar in one 12oz. can of soda to lower the body’s immune response by 60% for up to 9 hours.

At a time of year when our immune systems are already taxed with the stress of daily life and lack of sunlight, sugar can certainly weaken our body’s defense system as well. Additional calories not burned off are easily stored as fat and with Thanksgiving and Christmas just around the corner this can start us off in a down turn of our health.

To combat against sugary sweets haunting our household our family is visited by “The Great Pumpkin” on Halloween night. When the kids come home from “Trick or Treating” we all sit on the family room floor and sort through the treats. The kids are allowed to keep a half dozen of their favorites and the rest go back in the bag. They leave the bag on the floor before they go to bed. That night, while the children are sleeping, “The Great Pumpkin” takes the bag of candy and properly disposes of the contents (after a couple of the M&M’s and Reese’s have been removed of course). In turn, “The Great Pumpkin” leaves a gift, such as a book, Lego’s, videogames and maybe a piece of fruit. The kids have always enjoyed waking up the next morning to a wrapped gift.

The intent of creating “The Great Pumpkin” visits was another way of instilling concepts of wellness in our children, to make healthy choices that can last a lifetime.

Hope you all had a safe Halloween!

The Bus Driver

Natural Consequences – Puke Girl and Poop Boy

2009-10-21T20:06:00.000-07:00

Every now and then, I come across children that make me shake my head and wonder, “Why?” I am talking about children who insist on trying to be manipulative to get their own way. Now, most children have manipulative tendencies, but there are a few, such as Puke Girl and Poop Boy who take it to extremes.

Puke Girl is likely in the 4th grade and is a very bright child. She likes to make herself vomit in order to attain attention and to accomplish a couple missions. The first mission is to get off the bus as quickly as possible by vomiting so the bus driver has to call the school nurse, school nurse calls mom, mom comes and picks up the kid, no stinky bus ride home. Her other mission, should the first one fail, be that SHE be the FIRST child to be taken home by the bus driver, again using the vomiting as her excuse. The second scenario typically happens if the child happens to live towards the end of the route.

Poop Boy is a 7/8-year-old morbidly obese boy who is prone to tantrums if he does not get his way. He uses the same tactics as Puke Girl in order to garner attention. If he does not get his way (having a seat to himself, getting off the bus first) he throws a tantrum, huffs and puffs, and poops his pants. The result being a very stinky, tantrum-y child who still does NOT get his way.

Most children when legitimately sick, will have things they cannot control. Most of them don’t think about how they’re going to puke or poop today in order to get attention. I can usually tell those children who are legitimately sick as opposed to the others. Those kids who are legitimately sick typically look sicker than the fakers. They also will come up and tell you themselves instead of sending another student to do the “dirty work.” The main tell tale sign is that other students on the bus tend to roll their eyes at the offender as if to say “Oh not again!!”

I have developed a few tactics to deal with the “repeat” offenders. My first tactic in regards to pukers is no sympathy. I tell them to aim for the trashcan and if they miss the trashcan, they can be the ones to clean up the mess. My second tactic in regards to pukers is that when they are done, they can take and hold the plastic bag ALL the way home, and then they can be responsible for disposing of it. My third tactic is to not give into their demands. If they puke or poop, they get to sit in it or around it all the way home. I’m not going to reroute just to accommodate them. Insensitive yes, but it gets the point across especially on a very long bus ride.

Unsympathetic,

The Bus Driver

Police Escort, The Rodeo, and Screamer Boy

2009-10-15T20:08:00.000-07:00

Last Thursday, we took the local elementary schools to a free rodeo put on by local rodeo enthusiasts who hold a rodeo every year. Last year, we went and the place was packed, but there was still plenty of seating for everyone. This year however, it seemed the crowd doubled and there was standing room only. People were parked every which way and it was near impossible to maneuver the 35+ buses that were assigned to transport students to and from the rodeo. Some of us even had to do double duty, myself included.

Because of this double duty and due to the location of the two schools I transported, the local sheriffs provided escorts to and from the rodeo, flashing lights and all. When we have police escorting us, it’s the only time we can LEGALLY go through stop signs and red lights. It freaked some of the teachers out that were riding with me when we came up on the first stop sign. It was also cool to be the last bus in line, radioing ahead for clearance (the police were listening to us), and seeing the cruisers come flying past us at 80+ mph to get to the next checkpoint to block traffic for us. All in all, a great use of police resources.

In other news, I get to go see Disney on Ice this year. I’ve heard its actually Nemo on Ice, so I get to see the little fishy skate. Again your tax dollars hard at work.

Next item of business, Screamer Boy. Screamer Boy is an obnoxious middle schooler who insists on making every bus drivers life a living hell. There are about a handful of kids on this same bus who are equally as obnoxious and when confronted about the deplorable behavior, these kids deny any involvement or any knowledge as to who it is that is being the most obnoxious. I drove the bus about 2 weeks ago and all of these kids (middle school AND high school) were extremely obnoxious and downright disrespectful. I even pulled over and demanded they stop the behavior at once and they got up in my face and demanded that I let them off and told me to basically go to hell in a nutshell. The kids even refused to get quiet at the railroad crossings which is required by LAW.

Screamer Boy insisted on screaming obnoxiously in short bursts the entire bus ride, getting on my nerves quite frankly, he almost caused me to have an accident SEVERAL times because of his screaming. If a kid screams, I’m trained to find the problem quickly as a kid may be in DANGER. This screaming was obnoxious and DELIBERATE. Screamer Boy got off at his stop (he was the only one at his stop) then turned and screamed at the bus deliberately in a motion as to say F-U B*tch. I made note of what he looked like and who it was.

I got sweet revenge last Thursday when again, I found myself driving the same bus. I pulled up at the middle school and Screamer Boy got on the bus. I told him flat out that he was going to sit in the front seat. He looked at me and said “You can’t make me sit in the front seat, and I’m not gonna sit in the front seat.” I think he said a few cuss words in my direction and was extremely disrespectful in tone. I called the principal over to the bus and explained the situation from two weeks ago. The principal called him to the front of the bus and requested that he follow my directions. He got very disrespectful and lippy with her and she told him that either he could follow my direction and sit in the front seat or find himself another ride home. He chose to get off the bus and find another ride home. Surprisingly with him off the bus, no one else acted out or was disrespectful. I believe the kid is probably the ringleader of this group and gets everyone started and then sits back and watches the bus driver go crazy. I suspect this because a fellow bus driver drove the route today and had the exact same problems as I did. The sad thing is, the route is all of 15-20 minutes once the kids are loaded from all the schools. They can’t seem to behave sometimes.

Zero Tolerance,

The Bus Driver

The “Terrible” Weekend of Airports and Parades

2009-10-04T19:10:00.000-07:00

In the past two days, I’ve had a whirlwind adventure after whirlwind adventure. On Saturday, I drove a lady to the airport, and then transported a different lady to her son’s home within the same town as the airport. Sunday found me going in the opposite direction with an ornery elderly gentleman who groused the whole 6 hour round trip drive. This weekend taught me one lesson, PATIENCE!

The drive to the airport on Saturday was relatively uneventful except for the 30 million and one questions both my passengers asked and constant repeated answers. We finally pulled into the airport after two hours of ~~torture~~ pleasant driving. The lady informs me that she will need assistance in the form of a wheelchair and luggage cart. I step out of the van to locate assistance and saw the curbside Delta kiosk. I walked up to the gentleman standing at the kiosk and politely requested assistance with my client. He scoffed and asked if she was flying Delta. I told him she was flying with a competitive airline, but that airline did NOT have a marked desk for curbside assistance. I asked him if he would be so kind as to radio or call someone to help my client. He told me, “I only work for Delta.” I reiterated my dilemma and requested assistance politely (though inside I was screaming JACKASS!) He replied again with, “I only work for Delta, you can go over there and ask for someone else to help you.” Then he pointed to the other kiosk about 40 feet down the sidewalk.

I went back to the bus and informed the lady very loudly (so everyone in the vicinity could hear me) that because the Delta employee was being a complete ASSHOLE that it would be a little longer until I could get her assistance off the bus. I FINALLY got information from a very nice security guard who was pacing the sidewalk and was able to flag a lady down to help my client. For those wondering I HAVE written to Delta about their employee’s poor attitude towards helping anyone.

My second client and I returned to the highway to travel down a few extra exits and just got off at the exit to her son’s home, when we ran into traffic. A school bus was blocking the road, and we couldn’t figure out why. I maneuvered the bus around and made a U-turn and tried to detour around the traffic jam. Turns out, there was a homecoming high school parade and we ended up getting a front row seat and watched as the parade made its way down the main section of town. We finally made it to her son’s house where he promptly tried to hit on me, though he could have just been really friendly. I deflected his advances but was eternally grateful when we left.

This morning (Sunday) I picked up an elderly gentleman and drove 2 hours one way, then sat and waited an hour while he loaded up the bus with junk from his storage warehouses. During the drive up to his warehouses, we talked about how terrible life was, how crooked people are, and how everyone is involved with drugs. I have renamed this guy Negative Ned. It was pure torture listening to this guy grouse about everything that was so terrible in life. He hates the government and just about anything that moves! I was glad when we rolled back into town!

Adventured Out!

The Bus Driver

Babysitting=Jail Time? WTF

2009-09-30T19:45:00.000-07:00

I saw this on Facebook:

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1254093949546

Searched it on YouTube (the audio is slightly off for this video, but it has the basic story):

And News Articles:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/33068650/ns/today-parenting_and_family/
http://news.aol.com/article/michigan-tells-lisa-snyder-to-stop-baby/692754
http://www.infowars.com/michigan-authorities-attack-woman-for-babysitting-neighbor-kids/

This is insane! Parents try to do the responsible thing in finding adequate supervision for their kids for a mere 45 minutes while they wait for the school bus. Friends helping friends. This woman is facing jail time because she is a GOOD parent?! There is definitely something wrong with this picture here. The Department of Human Services tells the parents to "get the kids an umbrella, and make them wait outside". Next thing you know the SAME person who called in about this "Illegal Daycare" will be calling in about child abuse and neglect, because the children are waiting outside unsupervised in the rain/sleet/snow/sun.

I WISH parents were this responsible in making sure their children are adequately taken care of when they get on and off the bus. CRAZY!

WTF,

The Bus Driver

Influence

2009-09-25T18:56:00.000-07:00

I had a good laugh the other day when I pulled behind one bus with a bunch of kids misbehaving. I glared at the kid who was standing in the seat and acting up. He happened to glance back at me. I pointed down with my finger and mouthed the words, SIT DOWN. The kid got a wide eyed look and immediately shrunk back down in the seat. BUSTED!

Since I bounce from bus to bus, I get to know the troublemakers on each bus. This morning when I rode the bus and seated all the kids, they took one look at me and knew I meant business. I have perfected the "Glare" that causes any child to immediately start behaving.

Influentially Glaring!

The Bus Driver

Overheard - The Series Continues

2009-09-22T16:08:00.000-07:00

I often get very witty one liners from kids as they get on or off the bus. I've decided to document these and turn them into a recurring blog feature.

The last stop of the day had a brother and sister pair getting off the bus. Both kids annoy each other and the sister always seems to try to have the last word just to annoy the brother. The sister had gotten off the bus first and raced ahead of the brother to tell their parents what he had done.

The brother wanders up the aisle and suddenly stopped and looked at me and asked:

Brother: Ms. Bus Driver? Have they invented the human muzzle yet?

Me: Uhm, actually I'm not sure. Why? So you can put it on your sister?

Brother: Yeah! When I get older, I'm going to invent the human muzzle and she'll be the FIRST to try it!

Laughing Hysterically,

The Bus Driver

Stop Signs

2009-09-20T21:04:00.000-07:00

Every year we go through school bus safety rules with children. We review the safety concerns of getting on and off the bus, how to perform an emergency evacuation, and the importance of following all safety precautions on the bus. Every year there are students who get killed due to carelessness and ignorance. Part of the fault lies with the students, but a majority of the fault lies with the motorist who ignores the safety and laws regarding a stopped school bus.

School buses are equipped with emergency 4-way flashers, 8-way student lights, and flashing stop signs, sometimes the rear of the bus is equipped with a flashing panel warning motorists behind the bus that the bus is about to stop. Each state has their own laws regarding stopping for buses that are loading and unloading children, most states require that motorists obey the signs attached to the bus as if they were a fixed point. That means, if the school bus has all lights activated, the stop signs attached to the bus are extended, and you see the door open and students either entering or exiting the bus, YOU MUST STOP! DO NOT roll by the bus at a crawl. DO NOT speed up to get past the bus that is already stopped with lights and safety protocol activated. DO NOT play chicken with the children who may or may not be in the road and paying attention to YOU.

Often children get off the bus and cross the road without even stopping to look for traffic. They assume since the school bus is stopped, that it must be safe. Also, there are parents who are waiting for their children to get off the bus, some with the younger sibling of the child. As a motorist, you DO NOT want to explain to a distraught mother why you ran the school buses stop sign, and struck their child as their child was running into their arms. Rest assured though, if you do run our stop signs, we are required by law to record your license plate number, the color of your vehicle, and a description of you, and you WILL be getting a visit from a nice deputy explaining why it is important to stop for a school bus. You may also get a ticket.

We understand you’re busy and often in a hurry to get to your destination but please, consider the safety of the children and stop for school buses. You will be caught.

Always Cautious,

The Bus Driver

2009-09-19T21:43:00.000-07:00

Imagine my shock and surprise when I received a comment congratulating me on being one of Scholastic’s Top 20 Teacher Blogs. Naturally, I had to research this, and lo and behold, I’m definitely on the list as number 20. It’s quite an honor to be selected.

Welcome to my new readers that come here as a result of the Scholastic article. Up next, a rant on stop signs. Stay tuned.

Feeling Special,

The Bus Driver

Vacant is to Open as Occupied is to....

2009-09-11T05:51:00.000-07:00

"Wait, coach, whats that "O" word and what does it mean?"

Yes that is the question one of the 11th-12th grade varsity softball players asked on the field trip to their game yesterday. I couldn't believe it.

In other news, all students are now standing outside in 15 degree weather for 15 minutes while waiting for the bus... in short sleeves and shorts. Oh and its snowing too. (Not really, but apparently it must be cold according to parents so we must be insane to make kids wait for the bus. The real temperature in the mornings has been in the low to mid 70's.)

Overheard: Part Deux

2009-09-03T19:51:00.000-07:00

Today, I told the joke regarding broccoli and boogers to a pair of sisters, one is in 2nd grade, the other in 3rd. I baby sit them when their mom goes off to her second job. Their mom and I both drive a bus and are friends. Anyhow, telling them the joke, the third grader looks me dead in the eye after the punchline and says seriously:

"But Miss. Bus Driver, I eat BOTH my broccoli AND my boogers."

Speechless,

The Bus Driver

As Promised

2009-08-24T21:20:00.001-07:00

You can now submit questions or comments to busdriverquestions@gmail.com

Please feel free to ask any questions or let me know what you think of this blog. I'll do my best to answer any questions you have.

Overheard

2009-08-24T14:36:00.000-07:00

This afternoon, I was listening to a bunch of elementary kids share dorky jokes. The kind a 5th grader finds hilarious. Anyhow, the following conversation conspired between me and one of the children.

Child: Miss Bus Driver?

Me: What kiddo?

Child: Whats the difference between broccoli and a booger?

Me: I don't know? What?

Child: Kids don't eat broccoli!

I must admit, I laughed all the way to the next stop.

Response to a Comment

2009-08-22T18:57:00.000-07:00

On my last post, I received a very long comment from A Police Wife. I felt she asked some very valid questions and I felt they needed to be addressed in a separate blog post. So, I’ll be taking her long comment and addressing it piece by piece.

Hi, I came over from Walking a thin blue line when I saw your little bus avatar. I've always wanted to know what goes on in the mind of bus drivers. :) My daughter's (1st grade) school is right off a major highway and it's the scariest thing ever. I don't know if i'll ever let her walk to school on her own.

Dear Mrs. Fuzz,

Thank you for reading my blog and taking an interest in what goes on inside a bus drivers mind. Its not pretty at times, but we can always put a humorous spin on things. I hope that you don’t let your daughter walk to school unless there is a police escort/crossing guard to help her cross the busy road. Safety first.

Last year in kindergarten, they had a bus just for kindergarteners. The morning bus driver was great and the kids loved him. He interacted with them while he drove and my daughter would come home with songs and jokes that she learned from the bus driver. The afternoon driver was another story. She seemed stressed and flustered, and once we parents waited at the bus stop for over an hour. Finally one of us called the school, and the office said that all our kids were there in the office waiting to be picked up. Apparently the bus driver couldn't find the last bus stop on her route which was about 8-10 kids. So she took them back to the school and said, "go to the office. My shift is over" and she went home! no one had any explanation for us and many of us were very upset.

So I guess I want to know what should she have done? Isn't there a radio to call in to talk to someone if you get lost? Shouldn't she have checked with the school to see if parents were still waiting at the bus stop? It was very confusing. It seemed like she was just in a hurry to clock out and go home and didn't care what happened to the kids. Also, shouldn't she know the route like the back of her hand before driving it?

First off, I am appalled at the bus driver’s actions in complete disregard for the children’s safety and security. At least she did return the children to the school, but that does not excuse her dismissive behavior. However, that being said, getting lost happens, even to the best of us, and to those of us who think we know the roads. Sometimes buses are forced to reroute and detour due to unforeseen road conditions such as accidents, trains, washouts, fruit all over the highway, whatever the case may be. I don’t know the exact weather at the time of your incident, so I’m only speaking generally.

Secondly, there are several avenues available to bus drivers in these situations. Most buses are equipped with a two way CB radio that allows the bus driver to communicate with the bus garage. In most instances the bus driver will either be able to find the proper stop, or will simply ask the bus garage to contact either the school or the parents. Parents should fill out student information forms to give to the bus driver on the first week of school. The information contained in these forms is pretty simple and is standard. Name, phone number, address, etc. Please keep in mind if you don’t keep us updated as to your current phone number or address, we won’t be able to contact you as a parent and we will have to find other avenues of getting your child home, whether it be returning to the school or taking the child to the police station.

As a parent there are a few things you can do on your end. If your child does not arrive home within a reasonable time (within 10 minutes of the scheduled stop time – for example if your child is supposed to arrive home at 3:15, you should allow from 3:05-3:25 for your child to arrive through your door) you can call the school and you can call the bus garage and ask for a status on the bus. If anything they can try to put you in contact with the driver so you can either meet the bus, or agree upon a central meeting location that both you and the bus driver know in order to retrieve your child.

Third, sometimes buses end up having substitute drivers. Substitute drivers sometimes don’t know the routes as well as the normal drivers do and are prone to making mistakes. I’ve been on a few buses where I’ve taken wrong turns and needed to go around the block to correct my mistake. Even the most experienced bus driver makes mistakes, but from a parents perspective, 5 minutes can seem like 5 hours when it comes to missing your child.

Also, my daughter would come home and talk about the mean bus driver and one time when she did something naughty and i was not happy with her, she said, "your face looks like the same face my bus driver makes!" Sounds to me like she didn't like kids very much. So I guess another question I would love to have you answer would be what qualities, if any, do you think an elementary school bus driver should posess?

Sorry for the epic comment. You have a fun blog to read!

I transport all age children from pre-k (4) to highschool (18). As a bus driver, I have learned to be patient. Kids will be kids, they will act up, and they will goof around. The trick is finding the balance between expecting them to show proper behavior and allowing them to have fun. I try to make safety my first priority, and that means that I will not allow a child to stand up on the seat or on the bus while it is in motion, to stick their head, hands, arms, feet or any other body part out of the open window, to create excessive noise to the point it prevents me from hearing traffic or the important CB radio announcement, and I will not let them eat or drink on the bus (except water).

Writing a kid up every time they pick their nose, or sneeze, or dumping their book bag out everywhere is ridiculous and absurd. Kids will not be perfect, but you can expect them to show respect to you and their fellow riders. Setting firm boundaries that are clear and precise allow even the youngest children to understand and follow the rules to keep them safe. A firm quiet tone will go way further than a loud screaming shouting match. Kids respond better when they see that you mean business in a firm way. I have perfected the “look” that will make a kid shrivel and behave. They know I mean business when I give them the “look.” Will there be days when my attitude is not a happy one, sure, but I try not to let that affect the kids. I’ve been known to pass out candy canes, or pencils on certain holidays, and play holiday appropriate music on the bus as the seasons draw near. I’ve also been known to just let them have fun. For example, Friday I had a busload of kids singing “The Wheels On The Bus” and “The Gummy Bear Song”. I sang along!

I hope this answered your questions!

Singing Along,

The Bus Driver

Playing In Traffic

2009-08-20T20:24:00.000-07:00

Is there no end to middle school stupidity?!

This morning as I was finishing a route and pulled out onto a major highway (4 lanes across with a turn lane in the middle dividing the 4 lanes)I had the unfortunate pleasure of watching THREE middle school boys play chicken with rush hour traffic.

Actually to be more precise, two of the boys were egging on the third who played a game of "tag" with the white lines on the pavement. First the boy wandered into a single lane, then he tried his luck and raced ACROSS the FOUR LANE road to "tag" the white line on the other side. I know we cannot control the people who walk along the side of the road, but my heart froze when I realized the kid was being stupid.

Most of the time, mornings will find very few kids walking to school, but in the afternoons, there is a FLOOD of middle school kids who like to walk home from the school instead of riding the bus. Unfortunately, this middle school is located along a major highway and there is really no safe place to cross. I've watched kids dart out in front of buses, I've had them dart out in front of me causing me to slam on the brakes to avoid hitting them.

One of my biggest fears as a bus driver is seeing a child get struck by a vehicle, bus or car. Either way it would be a huge tragedy.

This also brings me to another point. With school being back in session and buses traveling the roads more frequently, if you drive, please be on the lookout for kids at bus stops as well as the school bus itself. I know a big yellow box is pretty hard to miss, but we've had people to run right into our rear ends while we're stopped either letting children off the bus, or picking them up from their stops. So please use caution and be more alert while driving especially during the course of a school year.

Astounded,

The Bus Driver

Will you PLEASE just SIT DOWN!

2009-08-18T21:11:00.000-07:00

Ok, sometimes I do harp on children staying seated, but after coming across this gem on failblog.org I have come to the conclusion that I don't tell children to sit down because its for MY good, but its for THEIR good. I see this happen all too often when a child will not sit down or refuses to park their behinds in a seat. They don't sit down, they get hurt, parents get angry, and somehow its our fault even though most of the time we're continually telling them to sit down, face forward, lower their voices, whatever the case may be.

Today my coworkers and I were discussing our ideal bus. Most of our suggestions included built in straight jackets in the color of your choice (grey or mahogany) - to match the bus seats, mandatory duct tape over those mouths that don't seem to want to stay shut, and that industrial strength velcro in vest form to keep them stuck to the seats. Other ideas that were tossed around were rollercoaster restraints - the bar AND the overhead chest restraint, and other ways of making a child sit and stay in a seat.

Safety First,

The Bus Driver

A Little Better

2009-08-16T08:36:00.000-07:00

So far, the second day went far better than the first. It is still a bit of a disaster when the powers that be decide that we're going to make all these "exceptions" for all these kids. Another problem is brewing though and that is the traffic. There is greatly increased traffic flow around the schools and that is causing some major traffic backups around town. Unfortunately due to the change in the configuration of our school, there is simply not enough space at 2 out of 4 elementary schools to accommodate the number of buses needed to start at each school.

I hope that through the week ahead, alot of that congestion can be eliminated. So far, this year has been far better as far as kids being left behind. Because every school pretty much goes in one wave, all the kids get on their buses before the buses move, therefore eliminating any confusion as to where to stand or sit to wait for the bus.

I think that as the week progresses, we will find most buses getting home at normal times with a few outliers.

Optimistic,

The Bus Driver

DISASTER

2009-08-13T20:06:00.000-07:00

Today we started a brand spankin' new school year, and there is only ONE word (well actually several words including some cuss words which are woefully inappropriate for little ears to hear) to describe today, and that is DISASTER.

There have been alot of changes to our schools this year including a switch to a new K-5 configuration for 3 of our schools, new teachers, new routines, and new bus zones. They have divided up old routes and created all new routes based on the zones, taken kids off certain buses and totally confused them when it came right down to it this afternoon. They're also busing our pre-k babies (4-5 yr olds) from one school to another just to get them on the proper buses. We had crying kids, kids in the wrong school, kids who had no bus, and kids who were just stuck places with no one to help them.

I drove a bus that went to schools and picked up the "stragglers." These are the kids who missed their bus, got on the wrong bus, or had no other place to go.

I expect things will even out by tomorrow or even monday, but its going to be a headache until then.

****New Announcement**** I'd like to open this blog for reader/parent questions. If you have any questions on the process of being a school bus driver, on what its like to drive a school bus, or any bus for that matter, or if you'd like to just ask me a question, please feel free to submit them in the comment section after any blog post.

Presently all comments are moderated, so I can select those comments and respond back with a blog answer. This is until I get a blog specific email set up so people can submit their questions.

Popping Advil,

The Bus Driver

Countdown

2009-08-10T02:41:00.000-07:00

August 13 is our first day of school. Our state is facing budget cutbacks this year and all teachers and other personnel are being asked to furlough some of their paid days this year to help make ends meet. Luckily bus drivers in my county are unaffected by this request due to the fact that children HAVE to go 180 days to school.

We have two meetings coming up and our county is facing some very large changes for the 2009/2010 school year. Children are being shifted into certain zones to even out the attendance and bus routes are changing to accommodate. It will be a very interesting year.

Contemplative,

The Bus Driver

The Hummingbird

2009-08-07T14:09:00.000-07:00

A few days ago, I experienced something that few people ever experience. I held a hummingbird in the palm of my hand and nursed it back to health. I was at a Walmart nearby and was heading in to do some much needed shopping, and noticed a small object on the ground. On first glance it looked like a butterfly, but upon closer inspection and noticing the Walmart employee who picked up the object that it was a hummingbird.

She was pretty stunned from her hard landing inside the entrance to Walmart and the employee told me that she didn't know what to do. I remembered hearing from my mother that hummingbirds enjoy nectar which is basically sugar and water. I was on a mission then! I was able to get some sugar and water from the Mickey D's inside Walmart and held the cup up to the bird's beak. She hungrily lapped up the water and made a full recovery. She was so comfortable with me she stayed on my hand a bit before flying away.

I'll have Patience with a side of Crazy

2009-08-03T18:46:00.000-07:00

Friday was a very difficult day. It started out ordinarily enough, but then progressively got worse over the course of the day culminating in to full blown chaos. I normally handle chaos very well, but after a day of dealing with the folks I’ve dealt with, I simply didn’t need any more stress to add to the pile. All names are fake but describe the person.

First, let me tell you all about Captain Crazy. Captain Crazy lives with his mother, Mrs. Crazy, out in the boondocks. Mrs. Crazy is very unstable on her feet and prone to falling (she’s fallen before). She is also very elderly, and has a lot of medical problems. Captain Crazy cares for Mrs. Crazy, probably not by choice. I hauled them to the doctor about a month ago and Captain Crazy earned his name by shouting that he is going to sue the transit company and carried on and basically was loud and obnoxious the whole hour long ride. Captain Crazy even called his LAWYER while he was being transported. I fought the urge to slam on the brakes and send Captain Crazy sprawling. Anyhow, fast forward a few weeks and I hauled both again to the doctors, this time locally. I made it a point to be polite to Captain Crazy and ask HIM how he was doing. I supposed no one paid much attention to him and I assumed that he probably got “stuck” caring for his mother. He seemed to be more agreeable then. Then Friday, I ended up hauling him again, this time alone. HE was using his mother’s power chair, which seems to be permanently stuck on high speed! Whatever.

The second thing that aggravated me was the fact that I had to haul Mopey Mona. Mopey Mona is in a constantly depressed state and tends to repeat herself over and over and over again. She whines about every little problem that happens to her so much I want to just scream at her, “LOOK bitch, I’m working two jobs, and paying all my bills, my parents don’t live near me and I’ve pulled my big girl panties up and move on with life!”

The third thing that really frustrated me was the lift from hell. Often times our lifts need a little help working or they tend to break from over use every day. The bus I have been using during July, had a lift that had broken and had constant need of repair. Now the lift does go up and down but is temperamental when it folds up. Sometimes I had to do a voodoo dance, other times I had to stand on my head, and sometimes I would just give up and manually pump the stupid lift into the up position. Yay, SWEAT! I now call that lift the “wonder lift” because I wonder if its going to work!

Fourth thing that pissed me off was the Nursing Home from HELL! Hell exists, in the form of this nursing home. Hell Nursing Home (HNH) constantly calls transit for one thing or another, then consistently cancels or gets their dates messed up or never has the person who needs transport ready, and expects US to do THEIR jobs, like go and get the person who needs transport from their ROOMS, make sure that they have all their medical things and I think some people assume that WE accompany them into their doctors appointments! We. Don’t. Once HNH had a client they sent with me to their HEART MRI with NO escort. We were halfway there when I glanced at her paperwork and found out that she SHOULD have an escort. Instant abort of the mission.

HNH also schedules outings for very large groups, about half the people in wheelchairs and half are handicapped to the point they really shouldn’t be going out at all, upwards of 12 some odd people at a time. When we get there, HNH typically refuses to help the driver load and secure all the people. Think about it ONE driver, 12 limited functional people, its enough to make anyone go crazy. With a group THAT size, you need 1 (maybe 2) people INSIDE the bus to help the folks get settled (i.e. transfer from wheelchair to seat, fold wheelchairs etc), 1 person to operate the lift and help push people in, and 1 person to help load the lift from the ground. Wash, Rinse, and Repeat at destination. As drivers, we are not supposed to be pulling or pushing or straining ourselves far beyond getting a wheelchair set in the right place or simply buckling a seatbelt. First off, they aren’t OUR patients. We simply transport from point A to point B. If its one person for transport, the load is manageable, but more than one is impossible without help. Folks who cannot handle themselves, need to have escorts with them because we do not provide an escort service.

So back to Friday, I took a different bus with a lift out to HNH to pick up a huge group of people so I wouldn’t have to deal with the “wonder lift”. HNH had a PRN Nurse who helped me out loading and getting people situated, then she got to ride with them all the way to destination. She was absolutely wonderful, but the normal staff of HNH stood around looking dumb except for like one lady who would help load on to the bus. We get to the destination and go back for our second run after unloading everyone from the first run.

During the second run, the lift on the bus started acting up, stopping and starting and being very obnoxious. We get all the way out to the destination for a second time, with the one lady we couldn’t fit on the original trip, and lo and behold, the lift won’t work. I figure no problem; I’ll simply manually operate the lift, get the PRN Nurse back to HNH and simply go back and get another bus. I go to find the bar to manually operate the lift, and there is no bar. So now I’ve got a lady in a wheelchair that wont fit down the aisle so we cant take her out the front door, she cannot walk or get out of her wheelchair and we have to get her off the bus somehow. We grab two very kind and strong men and decide to lower/back her out the emergency back door. I turn the bus around and go to start going up the hill, and the bus will not make it up the hill and dies on me. I then notice the gauges are non responsive on the dashboard, the battery light is on the dash and nothing else is working on the bus. I’m able to back the bus into a parking space where I call bossman. Bossman comes out and tries to get the bus to work. He has me shut the bus off, and then try to restart the bus. It is now completely dead. He took me back to the yard where I picked up the bus with the wonder lift, because it was the largest bus available and headed back out to pick up the group. Wonder lift worked decently for the return trip although return trip I did not have the wonderful PRN Nurse and got bitched at by staff from HNH. The staff also seemingly stood by twiddling their thumbs looking at me like I had three heads when I repeatedly asked them to please help. Instead one of their CLIENTS (a patient with one leg) got up and offered to help. Yes, HE had the decency to see that I needed help with all these other clients, and was absolutely wonderful. When HNH staff saw that HE was helping, they immediately tried to tell him not to help, and he flat out said to them “Well YOU aren’t helping her!” I immediately loved the guy!

During my last trip, HNH staff lady had the nerve to ask me if OTHER places had to help drivers with their clientele. I flat out told her, YOU take a lot of people with you, and there is no way one person can do the job single handedly, so the answer is YES they do have to help. After all that, it was close to 11 pm at night, and I had been awake and working since 6:30 am, with limited breaks totaling maybe 2 hours. I was exhausted, frustrated, and all together seething at HNH. I hadn’t had the opportunity to eat much all day, so I treated myself to a decent dinner. Then I had to turn around and leave at 6:30 am on Saturday morning to work 7 more hours. I didn’t get a break till Saturday afternoon around 2 pm.

Today when I went in, I had to go back out to destination to pick up the dead bus. Maintenance came out and jumped the bus then we charged the battery just enough to get us back to the maintenance shop. I think it was the alternator that died on the bus causing the battery to run down. So, that, in a Nutshell, is what I’ve been dealing with all summer! I can’t wait for August 13!

End Rant,

The Bus Driver

Busy Busy Busy!!!

2009-07-16T07:58:00.000-07:00

I haven't had much of an opportunity to blog, so don't think I've forgotten. I put in 57 hours of work last week alone and have got several more hours this week. Lately my new job has been going very well. I've certainly met many characters who are very very interesting.

Just yesterday I drove a man who is a former senator and who has met Franklin Delano Roosevelt. He also gave me a history lesson on physical therapy in America and spoke to me about never giving up. I meet people from all walks of life and all have been an inspiration to me. They talk, I just listen.

Presently, I'm toying with the idea of writing a book based on my experiences as a bus driver.

On a side note, I am also toying with keeping track of the miles that I travel in the period of one year just as a fun experiment.

School's Out for Summer!

2009-06-08T17:53:00.000-07:00

SCHOOLS OUT FOR SUMMER!!!

Actually our last day was June 5. I was never happier to see a day in all my life. The new job is going great and I am looking forward to some extra hours. I'll have to blog more later, but right now, dinner is done and I'm rather hungry!

The Bus Driver

Read Between The Lines

2009-05-31T14:43:00.000-07:00

I have come to despise shopping. Yes, shopping. I avoid Wal-Mart like the plague. I have even come to hate stepping into my local grocery store. Why? Because of parents who cannot control their ~~heathen spawns of the devil~~ children. I can live with being recognized as a bus driver, but when your ~~heathen spawn~~ child is running up and down the aisles screaming mommy look it look it look it. Or mommy buy me buy me buy me. Or even granny I want I want I want. It is neither attractive nor appealing for me to listen to while I’m trying to do my shopping in peace.

For instance, today at the grocery store, I happened upon this mother and her ~~devil spawn~~ wonderfully behaved approximately 5 year old child. It was in that ~~dreaded~~ Ice Cream Frozen Treats aisle where this child was ~~incessantly nagging~~politely asking his mother for more freezer pops. His mother told him ~~no less than 5 times~~ once that there was no space in the freezer for more Popsicles, and that he would have to finish the ones they originally bought. Not only that, the child insisted on following ME up the aisle where when I turned around and discovered the ~~heathen~~ sweet little boy, he ran off in the opposite direction back to his mother, while I ~~resisted the urge to run him over with my shopping cart~~ smiled politely and went about my shopping. I encountered him again at the checkout where he was ~~running wildly up and down the checkout lane~~ standing patiently next to his mother while she got the groceries. I ~~resisted the urge to drop loud hints that this mother should put her child on Ritalin~~ smiled politely again and went and paid for my groceries.

Checking Out,

The Bus Driver

My Scariest Moment

2009-05-24T12:37:00.000-07:00

As a Bus Driver, I’ve had a lot of nerve-wracking moments, but none compare to this one. This happened when I was a fairly new bus driver.

I was driving one of the older spare buses on a route and had just finished picking up all the students from the schools. I had a packed bus. Often we have the younger ones sit 3 to a seat, and the older ones sit 2 to a seat. I was heading out towards the route and brought the bus up to about 45 mph. I approached a local intersection and noticed that the stoplight had turned yellow.

I swiftly and firmly applied the brakes attempting to slow and stop the bus packed full of children in order to prevent an accident. I felt the bus slow when the brakes suddenly released and the brake pedal pushed all the way to the floor. The bus had only slowed from 45 to 35. At this point the light had turned red and I saw that there was no way to stop the bus from proceeding through the light.

I pressed on the horn and prayed! We barreled through the red light at 35 mph with my foot on the useless brake praying that either the bus would stop or that we wouldn’t get hurt. Luckily no one was hurt!

I radioed into the bus shop for another bus as the brakes didn’t seem reliable on the bus I was on, and got told to “carefully finish” the route. I was able to keep an eye on my speed and slow the bus appropriately for each stop afterwards, but it was truly scary!

Nine more days!!

The Bus Driver

Shout out to Middle School Secretary

2009-05-23T12:28:00.000-07:00

hey you made your blog to be invited readers only!! i miss your rantings!!! :(

Adventures in Parking

2009-05-16T17:55:00.000-07:00

As a bus driver, I am expected to maneuver the bus into some pretty tight spaces. Often, I find myself in situations where parents seemingly block my access to an area where I need to be, or they tend to tailgate the bus, which then creates several traffic problems. While I don’t mind if parents follow the bus in order to get to a destination, I do wish that parents would tend to think a little bit ahead of the bus and be courteous if we have to turn around in tight spaces.

With that said, I took the local third grade classes to the Museum of Science and History in a nearby town. It was about a 2-hour drive, and quite pleasant up until the major construction on the road and massive traffic towards the city. I had been assigned this field trip in early October, so I had been looking forward to this field trip all year. We arrive at the museum without incident and I pull around a tight roundabout and pull into the museum driveway. The driveway leads into a small circle and is bordered by the museum on the right, a park at the head of the circle and a fairly large parking lot on the left. The intersection the museum sits on can be best described as a lowercase “t” with a circle at the top of the “t” and a circle where the two lines intersect.

Anyhow, I pull up and around the intersection and stop to unload children in front of the museum. Mind you, every OTHER bus had done this as well. Unfortunately, the parents following me had created a bottleneck situation in the intersection. My tail end was out of the intersection and NOT blocking traffic. They called Security to tell me to move. I simply told Security that I would move when we were done unloading the children. The teachers took their sweet time in unloading all the children off the bus all the while; I had parents sitting on my rear end.

At the top of the “t” there was the circle that lead into the park, I could have turned the bus around in there except that parents had parked all along the circle making it increasingly difficult to maneuver a very large vehicle around. I did the next best thing; I pulled INTO the parking lot in search for a space to park the beast. I was initially told that someone would tell me where to park, but alas, the kids unloaded, the teachers disappeared and I was stuck trying to find a solution. I noted all buses that were lined up along the street side of the parking lot and that there was no available space there. I noted one other bus that had parked IN the parking lot. So I assumed that it would be ok to park there. I pull into the parking lot and manage to take up only TWO spaces with this monster of a bus. I noted signs along the outer edge of the parking lot that stated clearly “Museum parking only.” I secured the bus and wandered into the museum.

I notify the front that I’m the bus driver with XYZ group and they wave me into the museum. I’m about halfway through an exhibit (my one and only exhibit of the day) when an employee finds me and tells me I’m needed at the front desk. I’m thinking, “Ok, they forgot to give me a ticket into see XYZ show or whatever.” So I call the front desk on my cell phone. The museum informs me that the parking lot across the small little circle is NOT owned by the museum and that I have to move my bus. The lady also informs me that the bus is about to receive a ticket for parking in the wrong place.

I run down to the front desk and inquire as to where I should park the ~~monster~~ bus. The lady tells me that the buses can be parked “underneath the bridge” down the street. Now, the distance from the museum to the bridge parking area is about the length of TWO Wal-Mart parking lots. There is a marina in between the original parking lot and the bridge parking lot. Confused yet? I was. THEN the museum informs me, “Oh, by the way, the parking lot owner called a tow truck.”

Holy Shit Batman!

Panic-stricken, I ~~ran~~ walked swiftly out the door praying that the bus was still in one piece and untouched. I could hear the conversation in my head.

Bus Driver: Hi Mr. Bossman Sir, we’re on a field trip in XYZ city and well, the bus is sort of at the impound lot and we’re stranded.

Bossman: What?!!?

Yeah, that would NOT go over well!

Luckily, the bus was still in the place I left it. There was no ticket stuck on the door or shoved on the windshield and there was no tow truck in sight. Feeling quite relieved, I maneuvered the bus around to the “appropriate” parking lot. As I entered the parking lot under the bridge, a large sign greeted me and informed me that the parking lot was a “Park ‘N Ride” parking lot and that only those with permits would be allowed to park there. Suffice to say, I didn’t bother leaving my bus for the rest of the day and sat in silence waiting for the children to enjoy their time at the Museum. I took that time to inform my boss of the situation so that there would be no surprises on Monday.

Thankfully Ticketless,

The Bus Driver

Coming Soon....

2009-05-12T21:40:00.000-07:00

More crazy and wacky stories from the school bus. The end of the school year is coming like a freight train with our last day being on June 5, and the summer looming ahead as a sea of tranquility with no screaming ~~animals~~ children to transport on a daily basis.

I've been kept busy running from one place to another and have hardly had a chance to breathe. I could be posting about the fabulous chocolate cake I consumed the other week while waiting for 6th grade band to toot and tweet their way through an invitational band clinic, or I could talk about the wonderful cookout food we had on the day on the river at a local 8th grade history field trip. Or about the upcoming 3rd grade trip to the Museum of Science and History this Friday.

Today, I had some unexpected and very much needed news. I have secured a second job for this summer and possibly into the next school year. I will be driving for the local transit system during the time I'm not on the bus. The job doesn't pay the best, but its a step in the doorway to possible opportunities. I love my job driving the school bus and wouldn't trade it, besides, the stories I come away with from the bus are unbelieveable (and somewhat insane)!!!! So, fear not readers, the year is almost out and this bus driver will be available far more for fun blogging and I'll definitely be working on queueing up some very interesting posts.

Speeding along!

The Bus Driver

Field Trip Qualifications

2009-05-03T08:30:00.000-07:00

JudyL posted a comment in one of my blogs posing several questions:

“On the subject of Field Trips, what qualifies a driver to do trips in your District? Are all NEW employee's allowed to do trips or do you have a time set for them to become more experienced and familiar with your highways, night driving and so forth?”

In my particular district, once a bus driver has a license to drive a bus, they are qualified to haul children. We complete at least 40 hours of training, with at least 28 hours in the classroom and 12 total hours of driving time. This driving time is split into two 6-hour sections. We have to drive 6 hours without children, which gets us acclimated to driving a very large vehicle. Then we drive 6 hours with children on the bus, which tests how we handle more stress. We are also required to have CDL class B licenses with Passenger and School Bus endorsements. We also have to pass the Air Brakes test at the DMV as well before we can even get behind the wheel.

No amount of training can fully prepare you for all the conditions you will experience as a bus driver. On the subject of field trips, in my district, we have field trip sign-ups once a year. Any new drivers can sign up for the field trip list as long as they have all their qualifications in place and they are considered full time employees. We usually have a small group of “Floaters” who are considered full time employees and the rest of the newcomers are considered Substitutes. The difference between the groups is that a Floater gets a salary and health insurance benefits, where as a Substitute comes in only as needed and gets paid only if they work. My district has approximately 5-7 full time Floater positions in addition to full time Driver positions. A Floater is a permanent full time substitute.

The sign up for field trips usually occurs around mid March and have 3 different options for drivers to choose. We have 3 types of field trips: Mid-Day, After School/Overnight, and Summer. I sign up for all three. Some of the more experienced drivers in my district don’t like that just anyone who is qualified can sign up for field trips. They feel a waiting period should be in place. In my case, I got my license in October and was able to sign up the following March for field trips. I had about 4 months of driving experience under my belt before I signed up for field trips.

This only details what my district does about field trips and doesn’t reflect on other districts in my state.

Chugging Along,

The Bus Driver

I have so much to update

2009-04-20T18:05:00.000-07:00

I have so much to update, but very limited time at the moment, but you can look forward to posts about my repair guy fiasco and the new unexpected overnight trip.. which happens tomorrow... and i found out about it today.

We just got off of spring break and have about 7 more weeks (34 days) of school left. I'm counting those days. I will update soon I promise!

April Fools, Necessary Items, and the Unexpected Day Off.

2009-04-05T15:16:00.000-07:00

Well incase you haven’t figured out, the post below is actually a grand April Fools Joke orchestrated by Mr. Teacher over at Learn Me Good. For one day, a group of bloggers “traded places” and it was met with mixed results. The post featured on my blog was actually written by Ms. Teacher. If you want to view my post for April Fools, head on over to 100 Farmers and read up on Bugspray, Sandgnats, and the Zoo. Mr. Teacher has posted a full list of bloggers who participated.

A Bus Driver Bag is essential for all bus drivers. Yes, I keep a bag filled with items that a bus driver should keep handy at all times. These items include, but are not limited to, a Poncho/Umbrella, Bugspray, Sunscreen, a good Book, various pens/pencils, a Hat, a functional Calendar, Water, and anything else that a bus driver might need.

Most of the items are common sense items, but they are essential to the survival of a bus driver. You never know when you might get caught without any of those items and desperately need it at the place and time.

On Friday, we had an unexpected day off due to inclement weather. We had major rainfall over the course of Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, and the roads were fairly poor condition. Additionally, there were several roads closed due to major flooding. We’re still recovering from the massive rain, and are scheduled for more tonight into tomorrow. This was the first time the school district had decided to close school due to the weather. I’m glad they did, it allowed me to do some much needed errands and pay some bills that had been pushed to the side.

Sopping Wet,

The Bus Driver

It's the fault of the Big, Bad Teachers Unions!

2009-04-01T00:02:00.000-07:00

Friday nights you can usually catch me watching "Real Time with Bill Maher." About two weeks ago as I watched Bill Maher, he started talking about teachers and teachers unions. It came quite as a shock to me when I heard him basically bash teachers unions, stating that it was the fault of these unions for allowing bad teachers to stay in the classroom.

Like I said, I was shocked. For me, I know what the reality is in my district when it comes to getting rid of bad teachers and I also know that my reality is the reality for a lot of teachers in their districts. Simply put, administrators are in charge of getting rid of bad teachers and they simply do not do it. I think that for some administrators in my district part of the problem is that it is not easy to get teachers to work in our district. The other part of the problem is administrators are overworked ~~not underpaid~~ and so following the procedures to get rid of a bad teacher is just one more thing for them to do.

The thing to keep in mind though is that it is the responsibility of administrators to get rid of ineffective and/or bad teachers. It is not the responsibility of the union or teachers. I've worked with bad teachers, some of whom were paid more than me, and yet they continue to work because the administrator won't do what it is necessary to get rid of them.

In California, administrators can get rid of any teacher for any reason within their first two years of teaching. This is what is called a non-reelect and for many teachers it is almost a kiss of death in terms of trying to find another teaching position. Within those first two years, the union cannot do anything to help the teachers receiving a non-reelect. (I've seen non-reelects given simply because the principal did not like a teacher.)

After that first two years is up, teacher are given tenure. In my district, teachers receive evaluations every other year under Process B. If teachers receive a satisfactory review, they are then not up for review for another year. However, if they receive an unsatisfactory review, then teachers fall under Process A (the review for new teachers w/in their first two years of teaching). This process requires the administrator to evaluate the teacher every year. Teachers who fall back under Process A are also required to work with a consulting teacher under our PAR program (Peer Assistance and Review). If a teacher fails to improve under Process A, the administrator can elect to "fire" the teacher. However, very few teachers in the state of California or even in my district are fired.

Some will point to this fact and state that is because of teachers unions. However, according to David Macaray, teachers in non-union states also have a very low rate of being fired by their administrators. It would seem that if unions were the problem, then those states without unions would have a higher rate of letting ineffective and/or bad teachers go. That is simply not the case.

The hard reality for administrators is that people are not beating down the door to be teachers, especially in a district such as mine where we are the lowest paid, yet work in the toughest district. They understand that getting a teacher to fill positions that are hard to fill is easier said than done. For some administrators and districts, they prefer a warm body to nobody.

I wrote about a teacher at my own school site that everybody knew was a horribly, bad teacher. Yet, year after year, he stayed teaching at my school site. It was only when he was arrested that the district fired him. He was still allowed to have due process as defined by our contract, however, we (as in the union) did not block the efforts of our district to get rid of this guy. In fact, if the proper protocols had been followed as defined under our evaluation process, I think it is safe for me to say that the union would not have blocked those efforts as well because we simply do not have that power.

The power to get rid of bad teachers lies at the feet of administrators. As a teacher and as a member of my union, I do not have that power. Bill Maher needs to understand these facts before he starts spouting off on something that in which he is clearly clueless.

Tribute to a fallen Bus Driver

2009-03-28T21:07:00.000-07:00

On Friday, some shocking news rippled its way through the bus shop. Early in the morning, one of our fellow colleagues, Mr. P, was gripped by stabbing chest pain. Best anyone can gather at this point, he was on his morning route and the symptoms came on suddenly. He had enough wits about him to stop and secure the bus and radio for help from the bus shop requesting someone come out and finish his route so he could seek medical attention.

Mr. P’s wife called the ambulance shortly and they raced him to the hospital. When they got there, his health declined quickly and they made the decision to airlift him to a larger hospital by helicopter. He suffered a massive heart attack in the helicopter on the way to the larger hospital and passed away en-route.

Mr. P was a kindhearted man who always put others before himself. He was a husband, father, and grandfather. He supported his family through the pay he earned as a bus driver. He never had a bad word to say about anyone else. He was a truly humble man who did the best he could in life. His passing was sudden and unexpected. Please keep his family in prayer.

Rest in peace Mr. P. You will be missed!

The Bus Driver

Write Ups and Parents

2009-03-21T18:55:00.000-07:00

After reading an article about a child getting suspended off the bus for excessive flatulence, I realized I hadn’t explained what sort of things a child can get written up for on a school bus. I explained the common rules found on a bus here. On our “Bus Conduct” forms there are 10 check boxes. Nine of them have common violations listed, but there is one check box always left blank with several lines for the bus driver to write in the offense. Most of us opt to write in the offense along with checking off several of the other boxes.

A child can get written up for the following and any variation of the following:

1. Violation of Safety Procedures

This includes standing on the seats, walking up and down the aisle while the bus is moving, changing seats, and not staying in assigned seat.

2. Destruction of Property

This is self-explanatory, but includes defacing school property by tearing, mutilating or otherwise damaging the seats, walls, floors and ceiling of the bus.

3. Fighting – Pushing – Tripping

They lump these three together and we are expected to circle the appropriate offense on a student-by-student basis. These are pretty obvious offenses.

4. Excessive Mischief

This goes hand in hand with the Violation of Safety Procedures and includes crawling under the seats, making noises deliberately for the distraction of the driver.

5. Writing/Smoking

Again self-explanatory offenses.

6. Insubordination

Not following the rules and being difficult.

7. Eating – Drinking – Littering

Yeah.

8. Rude – Discourteous – Annoying

Again.

9. Unacceptable Language

Yeah, no swearing allowed!!!!!!

10. Other – Describe.

We most commonly use this checkbox to describe the incident.

Even with all this, we still get parents who complain. A common grievance we get from parents is “Why did YOU give my child X days off the bus?” Fortunately we don’t actually make the decisions on what each child gets as punishment for the infractions we write up. The school makes that decision, yet still, we get parents who insist it is still our fault.

To those parents who say “Not my child, he/she goes to church/can do no wrong!” I say this: I warned your child several times. I pulled the videotape of the incident and watched it. In some cases, my boss watches it as well. The administrator of the school has watched the tape. The tape never lies. Additionally there are typically witnesses. Fellow students squeal like stuck pigs when its not them getting in trouble. They are perfectly happy to throw another student under the bus in order to save their own skins. So please understand that when your child got 3-5-10 day bus suspension, it is entirely your child’s fault, not the bus drivers’.

Writing away!

The Bus Driver

Speeding Drivers, The Warning, and The Spontaneous Insanity.

2009-03-13T21:05:00.000-07:00

The week started out pretty typically. The usual announcements to the SAME people who NEVER turn in their paperwork were, again, announced over the radio to everybody. I mean come on people; we are NOT children anymore who do not do our homework. Please just complete your paperwork for the Love of God! Then, in the same breath, the secretary announces that there is a meeting for all Field Trip Drivers.

Oh goody, WHAT do we have to do now? The last meeting was just them adding MORE paperwork onto our payroll sheets. First it was adding a long 27 digit number to the payroll sheets, then it was attaching the field trip FORM to the payroll sheets, then we have to do our fire and evacuation drill on EVERY field trip AND get a roster of students from all coaches/teachers. So, when this announcement happened, the first thought to my mind was what next? Are we going to have to stand on our heads and recite the ABC’s backwards?!

I dutifully go into the bus shop and wait for the meeting to begin. The Bossman comes in and proceeds to chew us out for speeding and for showing up late to field trips. It is already required that we show up 15 minutes prior to the departure time on our field trip sheets, now its required that we show up 20 minutes prior to the departure time. Speeding is a whole different ball game though.

The federal law mandates that a school bus cannot exceed 55 mph when traveling at “highway speeds.” If a bus is traveling within a town, the bus cannot exceed 45 mph, keeping in mind all speed limits in between. Years ago our buses were set (governed) at 55 mph exactly. That means the bus could not go past 55 mph. They changed it to 60 mph to allow buses to pass motorists going slower than 55 mph. As the newer buses kept coming in, they governed the speed at 65 mph, to compare with some of the fast 70 mph highway speeds we have here as well as giving buses extra “oomph.” Apparently the Bossman had been getting a few too many phone calls of drivers speeding and being unsafe. Instead of reprimanding just those FEW drivers who break the rules, the Bossman reprimands ALL of us. He set the gauntlet and told us if he had one more call or saw another driver speeding, that he would have all the maintenance guys govern the buses down to 55 mph again. Guess what happened on Thursday? Bossman got passed by one of our bus drivers doing over 65 mph. NOW our buses are governed at 55 mph. In my opinion, they SHOULD have been governed at 55 mph in the FIRST place. Again common sense is NOT present.

However, it was NOT me who was speeding on Thursday. Where was I? I was on a spontaneous insane excursion with my best friend. She called me up Thursday morning and asked me if I wanted to come along to a nearby big city (about 2 hrs away) and go pick up some items with her. I said sure, I’ll drive, you pay the gas and off we went. Sketchy parts of town with construction areas are definitely my idea of a good time. So is a jewelry store that looks like a pawnshop on the outside. We also almost got put on a local radio network when we got lost and turned around. It was nearing 12:30, and we knew it was going to be difficult to get back in town to get to work on time, so we devised a plan that we would try to call out separately for different reasons at different times and then plan to spend the rest of the afternoon goofing off and having fun. I went first as I had the earlier start time. I have to be at work for 2 pm and she has a 3rd wave bus that doesn’t begin until after 2:45 pm. I played sick and got the afternoon off. She couldn’t because there were already too many drivers out. Apparently I was the last one who could be out. DAMN, foiled! Anyhow, such began our RACE back to town so SHE could be on time. We literally pulled 80 mph going down the highway trying to get back to town after sitting in construction and dealing with idiot people all day. We cut it close because we stopped to see her husband on the way down. Her husband works for a big soda company driving one of their trucks. We left the big city somewhere between 12:45 and 1, and we somehow made it back into town by 2:10 pm, drove through Mc Donald’s for lunch, and then dropped her off at her bus so she could go to work. She barely made it. I had the rest of the afternoon off. The best part about this day is that I learned that my best friend is absolutely insane. She kept me in stitches with her stories about her rebel teen years including her near death experience with a snowplow.

We've also decided that one day we both need to just take the afternoon off and just hang out together.

TGIF!

The Bus Driver

The Planetarium and Chick-Fil-A

2009-03-06T19:47:00.001-08:00

Today I took the gifted 2nd and 3rd graders to a local area museum and planetarium. I have wonderful memories of the planetarium near where I grew up and assumed this would be similar, just smaller scale. The place was easy to find as it was on a college campus. The museum was located near the center of the campus and the planetarium was just a short walk away in the mathematics and physics building.

As a kid, the planetarium always gathered lots of adoration and excitement. We often explored the science museum for 3-4 hours prior to standing in line to enter the planetarium theater. While standing in line, there were always these cool lights that caused all white pieces of clothing to “glow” neon blue. The presentation inside the planetarium was educational and informational. So, today, when I discovered we’d be going to a planetarium, I was very excited to see it and compare to the one I knew as a kid.

We arrived about 9 am and the kids took in the museum first. I wandered the campus and peeked in the museum. It was nothing spectacular or impressive – just a few tables of artifacts and like 2 interactive exhibits. I walked on over to the planetarium and discovered a pretty neat lab of about 30 feet wide with a domed top. The small scale for a small university was expected. I briefly met the planetarium presenter (FrootLoop) before the children started trickling into the building. My impressions first off were that she was a little batty and somewhat scatterbrained, but I thought she would have it together for a presentation to 2nd and 3rd graders. I was wrong.

The presentation was absolutely AWFUL! FrootLoop began with reprimanding her two college student “assistants” in front of the children. She then insisted on rambling more about the space station and upcoming night sky events (along with other planetarium propaganda/fodder) and space exploration through NASA rather than point out a few constellations, speaking about the stars, and then conducting a “Solar System Walk”. She used a lot of words that were way over the education level of a 2nd and 3rd grader. I could tell that most of the kids were being polite, but were getting really restless after her third different explanation of the Greek Mythic History of the stars and their origins. The teacher kept asking about different parts of the program (Solar System Walk) and FrootLoop answered, “We’ll do that later…” or “But first I want to tell you about this real quick…”

I wandered out of the planetarium about 11:20 am as the teacher wanted to be on the road about 11:30 and I wanted to get back to the bus with time to unlock and sweep it off a bit before the children ambushed the bus in a mad dash to get away from the place. The teacher boarded the bus and as she sat down she remarked to me, “That was absolutely awful!” When I questioned her about it, she stated, “The whole day was one long boring lecture.”

Apparently, the museum gave them a really long lecture about Native American artifacts and they didn’t have an opportunity to complete the activity they really wanted to do which was a simulated fossil dig, classification, and identification activity. Then as they wandered over to the planetarium, the teacher was simply expecting about a 15-20 minute presentation that would include the simple things such as the make up of stars, 3-5 constellations, pointing out the Milky Way, and then talking about the order of the solar system before going outside and doing a “Solar System Walk” in which they get to actively distance out the solar system on a small scale. Instead, she got FrootLoop and her assistants who slept through most of her lecture. FrootLoop also insisted on showing the kids her necklace made from the rock of something in space. I left prior to that catastrophe.

The museum provided the children with “Grab Bags” of useless toys, trinkets, and annoying noisemaker whistles. Apparently the museum even messed this up too and didn’t have enough of the type of bags they were supposed to have. I think there were three different types of bags a teacher could request.

We headed over to a Chick-Fil-A for lunch and then went back to the school. As we were driving back, the teacher and I continued to discuss the poor quality of the field trip, and she mentioned, “I’d have to say, the best thing about today was going to Chick-Fil-A and having you as a driver.” Overall, the educational value of the fieldtrip bombed, but the kids I hauled today were the most well behaved children I’ve EVER hauled on a field trip. I made it a point to tell the teacher that I was incredibly impressed with their wonderful behavior. I think she is going to try to request me as a driver for future trips. We’ll see how that pans out.

Bleary Eyed,

The Bus Driver

Updating

2009-03-01T11:51:00.000-08:00

Ok, so the month of February has turned out to be busier than expected and every time I would get a minute to sit down and blog, it wouldn’t happen.

We had winter break just after Valentine’s Day, although it didn’t seem like much of a break as my grandparents came to visit, then I had two field trips over the course of the break. I learned that Applebees has good food to go and the couple times I’ve asked them to deliver it to the bus, they’ve acquiesced. All things considered, my life has been extremely busy.

Being a floater again is like walking on air. Yes I get the few kids that drive me nuts, but then I don’t have to see them again for at least another 2 weeks. My voice has remained intact and the stress level has decreased quite a bit. When I’m stressed, I’ve learned I lose my voice. Losing your voice on a busload of children is NOT a good thing.

There have been some changes up at the bus garage, starting with the field trips. I’ve now become an airline attendant before every field trip. We have to give a little speech about the proper fire escape procedures to some very rude and obnoxious children who insist on not paying attention. I keep tweaking my speech to include things I forgot to cover in the last group. The bus shop didn’t really give us any real guidelines, so I suppose it’s as long or short as the driver wants it to be. We’re also supposed to collect rosters from the schools prior to actually going on the trip. The coaches and teachers must have the rosters on the bus and must give us a copy. I actually like these new guidelines because it gives us a little more control over the situation, plus we actually know whom we are hauling to and from events.

I had a field trip on Friday taking the local 6th grade middle school kids to the movie theater. Yes, that’s right the movie theater. I had heard we were going to see Coraline, but we ended up seeing Ink Heart. I don’t know WHAT the educational value of each of these movies is, but it wasted 3 hours on a Friday. Ink Heart was actually a decent movie starring Brendan Frasier and a few other unknown people. The premise of the movie was somewhat interesting and completely engulfed in fantasy. Again, I question the educational value. This is the time of year we typically get a lot of the “stupid” field trips that have little or no education behind them.

Overall, it’s been a good month and hopefully I’ll be able to blog more in March.

In Like A Lion,

The Bus Driver

Holidays that Bus Drivers Love to Hate

2009-02-07T22:19:00.000-08:00

Six major holidays coincide with the typical school year. Four of these are “candy” based holidays: Halloween, Christmas, Valentines Day, and Easter. Candy is something I absolutely HATE as a bus driver. Wrappers are constantly found on the floor. Unidentifiable sticky stuff ends up on the seats and seat backs. Mushy goo is typically wedged between the seat and the bus wall. Fluid spills from soda or other sticky drinks run along the floor, then dry, and manage to collect various amounts of nasty sand, gravel, dirt, and the occasional dropped M&M or Skittle. Gum is found pressed firmly within the grooves of the aisle providing sticky goodness to shoes everywhere. Garbage cans are a foreign concept to many children.

Halloween comes in late October, but early in the school year. Along with it comes a plethora of chewy gumdrops, chocolates, lollipops, and other Halloween based items. I find myself picking up Halloween based wrappers right up until January, when the candy supply runs out. Often kids will bring candy in their backpacks to trade or sell on the playground, or simply just to eat as a snack. Sugar City!

Christmas brings assorted jellybeans and peppermint candy canes to the mix. Add in a chocolate Santa and you’ve got a recipe for children bouncing off the walls. Usually these get lumped in with the same candy that’s left over from Halloween, or for the particularly voracious child is thankfully gone by New Years Day.

We experience a bit of a lull in the candy wrappers save a few of the cough drop ones, as it is now cold and flu season. Then Valentines Day hits. Ahh, the day of love and cherishment. A day for a child to express feelings as a secret admirer and to exchange “Be My Valentine” cards with EVERY OTHER child in their class. This, by far, is my favorite of the “candy” holidays as a bus driver. Why? You ask? Because, my dear readers, the children put NAMES on the cards, and I can write them up for eating and drinking on the bus. I know, its grinch-like, but when you’ve been sweeping up wrappers all year, you finally have your culprits in hand and name. All thanks to little Suzie who wrote To: Johnny, From: Suzie on the M&M’s wrapper.

By the time Easter rolls around, I’ve given up on the candy hunting and just resigned myself to sweeping up and praying no child chokes from the piece of hard candy they have in their mouths. Its especially hard as it is increasingly difficult to wade through the masses of backpacks, bodies and other items to get to the child that is choking let alone that child chokes WHILE I drive.

My final pet peeve comes in two forms. One is when a teacher insists on giving out candy as a reward to kids, just before they get on the bus. I will invariably find the wrapper and possibly the sticky residue of the treat the teacher so lovingly gave out. Please stick to pencils, erasers, and stickers!!! The second one is class parties that are given within the last 30 minutes of a school day. The kids are so hyped up by the time they get on my bus to go home, they are bouncing off the walls and are completely out of control. They are loud and obnoxious and the next thing I hear is crying as little Michael decided to pull an Evil Kenevil stunt and landed on his head as he vaulted over the bus seat in a feat of bravery. The crying is eventually drowned out by scads of children loudly screaming as little Jacob decided to projectile vomit ALL of his lunch AND his party foods that he consumed. Believe me folks when I say, projectile vomit of school lunch food and classroom party food is NOT something you really want to see. I just thank God that school buses are covered in rubber and vinyl.

Sugar High,

The Bus Driver

Seatbelts and the Backpack Rant

2009-02-02T20:39:00.000-08:00

I seem to be doing alot of topics in two's, so in keeping with tradition......

A popular topic as of late that is debated year after year is the issue of seatbelt restraints on school buses. Most states have laws where Special Education buses and smaller buses - half the size of a normal 72-100-passenger school bus - are required to have some form of seatbelt restraints installed. People often ask why seatbelts are not required for the larger buses especially given the “cargo” we transport daily. There is no doubt in my mind that seatbelts save lives, however a seatbelt restraint system in a large school bus while theoretically is a good idea, is largely impractical to implement.

First, there is the practicality of getting all the children seated and buckled. On a Special Ed bus, an aide rides along and ensures the children stay seated and firmly buckled. Additionally, on a larger bus, there is only one driver that handles all the children. Putting seatbelts on a bus only increases the possibility that they be used as weapons against peers. (Miss Bus Driver…..Little Joey choked/hit me with the seatbelt!!!) Also if the bus gets in a crash or otherwise needs to be evacuated quickly, some children may get stuck by the seatbelt. Many children don’t have the dexterity and strength it requires to press the seatbelt buckle. They may also be injured to the point of immobility. It then becomes the bus driver’s responsibility to free and rescue that child with a seatbelt cutter. Multiply the mayhem and insanity on a regular day times 100 and you’ve got what happens in an accident. As a driver, I don’t want that added responsibility on my shoulders.

I digress.

Backpacks are the fashion statement from hell. You may think it’s cute to send little James to school with a Spiderman backpack or little Mary to school with a Dora the Explorer book bag. What I see is the multitudes of paper your sweet child will dump all over the floor of my bus, which I have to clean, if the paper has not flown all over the bus and ends up crumpled or in my face while I’m driving. Also, I’m sick of picking up Joshua’s or Janie’s pencil that they forgot on the bus for the MILLIONTH time. They call it HOME-work for a reason! I swear I should charge a dime for every pencil the kids want to “borrow” from my cup of pencils that I’ve accumulated. I have to clean out the pencil cup at least 3 times a year to keep it from busting at the seams with pencils, pens, crayons, erasers, and other items I find on the bus floor.

Also those backpacks with wheels on it are the worst invention/fad EVER. It’s obnoxious enough when your child insists on taking EVERYTHING out of his backpack during a 15 minute ride and then has to hold the whole bus up when we’re at his stop waiting for your little cherub to wander up the aisle and waddle off the bus holding 20 million papers, but when your child insists on trying to wheel the backpack down the narrow aisle, getting it stuck on every seat along the way and holding up the route while they wrestle the stupid bag into the seat they’ve chosen, at the BACK of the bus, only to wash, rinse, repeat at school, here’s a little hint…. THE WHEELIE BACKPACKS DON’T FIT DOWN THE AISLE OF A SCHOOL BUS --- DON’T BUY
THEM!!!!!!!!!!!

Toys should be banned from the school bus. Especially toys that are round, or have wheels that make the toy move easily along the floor. Please teach your children that the school bus is not a playground and the seat is for sitting in, not playing with toys and being obnoxious. For the Love of God, please, please, please lock your children’s backpack and offer your child’s teacher a key. Then maybe you’ll actually GET that field trip permission form that didn’t end up in the garbage of the school bus.

Up next!! Obnoxious Children!

The Bus Driver

When Life gives you Lemons…. and MiniMouthboy Steals Again?

2009-01-31T13:55:00.000-08:00

Leesepea over at “But Wait! There’s More…” has bestowed upon me the “Lemonade” Award and it gave me some much needed blog love. Now I get to bestow it upon others!

I also like saying the word bestow. LOL

Here are the rules:
1. You must link back to the person you received the award from.

2. You have to nominate 10 bloggers who are deserving of this award!

So, without further adieu, I hereby bestow The Lemonade Award upon:

1. Pissed Off Teacher over at Pissed Off Teacher because her wry sense of humor and sharp wit has sent me laughing uncontrollably. Additionally she has to deal with the idiots over at the NYC Board of Education.

2. ChiTown Girl over at I Teach Kdg because of her willingness to work with the “little people.” I would go insane on day 1.

3. Ms. Bluebird over at Bluebirds Classroom because anyone willing to put themselves in the thick of seventh grade hormones has a big star in my book!

4. Ms. 14moreyears over at Have A Gneiss Day because like Pissed Off Teacher, she too has to deal with the morons over in NY, including her “colleagues” who insist on policing things like the copy machine.

5. Mimi over at Its Not All Flowers and Sausages because she is another teacher suffering through the ills of public school. Her most memorable characters are Bacon Hunter and Big Boy. I highly recommend her.

6. Officer Wright over at Juvenile Corrections because he works with the youth that has fallen through the cracks and are on their last shred of chances.

7. Foster Mama over at Postcards From Insanity because she helps those children in need of protection. So many go forgotten and lost and Foster Mama finds and helps them.

8. Tudu over at Finishing Off My Family because she takes in those children that nobody wants and loves them for who they are. She has a big heart and is wonderful.

9. Melissa over at Dispatch Hell because the range of stupidity is world wide!

10. Edna Lee over at Regurgitated AlphaBits because she’s just plain funny.

Now I would stop here, but I just HAVE to mention a few more blogs that are worth the read and also deserve this award.

11. Mr. Teacher over at Learn Me Good because teaching 3rd grade takes guts and also offers hysterical anecdotes.

12. Angela Powell over at The Cornerstone Blog because she offers some great stories and awesome advice.

In other news, I’m finally free of the heathens on my bus. I have officially gone back to being a “floater” and am loving every minute of it. People have asked me if I will miss the kids on my bus, and I can honestly say that while I will miss a few of them, I am glad to be rid of the majority of them. Already, the NewDriver is experiencing problems in getting them to behave and follow the rules. MiniMouthboy tried it the minute he realised I was not riding the bus.

Apparently, NewDriver found out that MiniMouthboy had been misbehaving and was out of the seat I originally assigned him. MiniMouthboy is not allowed past the second seat back because of his attitude and behavior issues. NewDriver redirected MiniMouthboy to his rightful seat and then proceeded to chat up the kids on the bus in a “getting to know you” fashion. During this time, MiniMouthboy proceeded to steal NewDriver’s voice recorder which he uses to keep track of the route until he feels confident not to need it. NewDriver returned to his seat and MiniMouthboy’s sister informs him that MiniMouthboy had stole the recorder from him. MiniMouthboy vehemently denies this accusation, but the recorder is found in MiniMouthboy’s pocket. Of course MiniMouthboy tries everything under the sun to claim its NOT NewDrivers voice recorder, but eventually gets proven wrong. NewDriver is learning not to trust the kids so willingly and not leave his stuff laying around the bus where a child could take it. I hope the kids don’t drive him insane.

Loving Life,

The Bus Driver

Alternative Girl Gets Suspended

2009-01-16T19:53:00.000-08:00

I intended to write this and post this earlier in the week, but my schedule dictated otherwise. Alternative Girl began to ride the bus again this week. So far she had only been riding the bus in the mornings, and when I check in with the Alternative School in the afternoons, I’ve been told I had no students to pick up. She rode Monday morning with a brief confrontation getting on the bus. She pushed and elbowed another student in order to get on the bus first. I stopped her and told her that pushing and elbowing is inappropriate. (Later the boy she “pushed and elbowed” told me that he tripped, but I seriously doubt this was the case, it looked like she pushed and elbowed him out of the way.)

Monday afternoon, I dealt with her cousin (WhinyGirl) who rides my bus regularly. She has a bad attitude and a whiny voice that grates on nerves like nails on a chalkboard. She constantly talks back to me when I give a directive. I had enough of her insubordination so I finally told her if she didn’t follow the directive I gave she was getting a write-up, she retorted with “I don’t care.” I told her that she earned another write-up, wash, rinse, and repeat. Finally I just shut up because I didn’t want to have to deal with her being a twit head.

Tuesday morning AlternativeGirl got on the bus and had a chip on her shoulder the size of Texas. She asked me why I hadn’t been picking her up in the afternoons and I explained how it worked and that she needed to notify the Alternative Administrator in order for me to come over there and pick her up. I’m usually one of the last buses going through the Alternative School in the afternoons as it is on my second run and I get there about 3:35-3:40 pm. She agreed and then asked me to come pick her up that afternoon. I agreed and in my mind was going to tell the Alt. Admin on duty about my trouble with her and her threats to me as detailed in my Pre-Christmas break blog.

WhinyGirl pipes up with “Miss. Bus Driver? My momma gonna talk to you at 4 when you drop me off today cuz you said I got 3 write-ups.” I think, “Oh great, I can tell her mom what has been happening with both WhinyGirl and AlternativeGirl.”

Tuesday afternoon, I go to pick AlternativeGirl up from the Alt. School and motion for the Alt. Admin on duty to come to the bus. I explained my problems with AlternativeGirl and AlternativeGirl flew off the handle. Like totally flew the coop! She started shouting about how I’m lying on her and how she didn’t do what I said she did. (This is where I find out the boy tripped.) The Alt. Admin redirects AlternativeGirl to sit down and be quiet and she flies off at him and starts saying that she’ll just get off the bus and walk home instead. Inside, I’m thinking, “YES!!! Get off the bus so I don’t have to deal with your –insert cuss words- all the way home!!” Finally, Alt. Admin had enough of her bad attitude and talking back and told her in short order to, “Get off the bus!”

Later, I pull up to WhinyGirl’s stop and her mother is there waiting on me. WhinyGirl’s mother cops a bit of an attitude with me at first, but her demeanor changes drastically when I explain her daughter’s behavior as well as AlternativeGirl’s behavior and threats. While I’m explaining, WhinyGirl interjects with her usual, “But it WASN’T meeeeeeeeeee.” plea to the general world and anyone who will listen. I then explain that the behavior WhinyGirl just showed is exactly the behavior that I’m dealing with on the bus in not following directives and doing what she’s told on the bus. The mother informs me that she will have a talk with both girls that evening. I thanked her and notified her that I hadn’t turned in any write-ups yet because I wanted to speak with her first and try to let her handle it at home before I take further action through the school. I have done this with other students in the past and it has worked out very well, they usually come back and behave better on the bus.

Wednesday morning marked a significant drop in the temperature here, so WhinyGirl’s mom asked if AlternativeGirl could ride that morning, as it was too cold to walk. I said absolutely. I’m not about to leave any child out in the cold, even if they have an attitude the size of Texas. That afternoon, I receive a note in my mailbox notifying me that AlternativeGirl has been suspended from the bus for 3 days starting Thursday and ending on Tuesday. She can ride the bus again next Wednesday. This was due to her atrocious behavior towards the Alt. Admin on Tuesday afternoon. I didn’t pick her up on Wednesday afternoon and was preparing myself for a fight with the mother on Thursday morning as I had told the mother that I wouldn’t turn in any write-ups just yet, but that AlternativeGirl still got suspended from the bus. WhinyGirl gets on the bus Thursday morning and whines to me about me getting her cousin suspended. I stopped WhinyGirl in her tracks and told her that it wasn’t my decision in the first place and that she had the altercation with Alt. Admin and THAT was the reason she was suspended.

Blessedly, Friday was a normal day. Next week, I train the new person on my route and I go back to bouncing from bus to bus. It should make for some interesting stories for sure!!!

Counting The Days,

The Bus Driver

Mini-Mouthboy and the Stolen Bicycle

2009-01-09T20:58:00.000-08:00

I wrote about Mini-Mouthboy early on in November 2008. While some of his behavior has improved, he still has not gotten the point of staying in his seat without causing trouble. I moved Pipsqueak away from him because he and Pipsqueak would get into massive trouble together and it caused a huge headache for me.

NewBoy and NewGirl are siblings that ride on my first round in the afternoon. Apparently NewBoy and his family are new to the neighborhood of resident troublemakers and delinquent children. On my route alone, I constantly have students in In School Suspension, or in some form of trouble either in school or on the bus. NewBoy’s parents are learning this lesson the hard way. NewBoy had his brand new Christmas bicycle stolen off their porch outside their house. The bike cost 150 dollars. NewBoy lamented this tragedy to anyone who would listen on the bus and Mini-Mouthboy somehow got tangled up in this situation.

On my second pass by NewBoy’s house, NewBoy’s mother flags me down. (Stick with me folks, it gets confusing here!) She relates this tale of the stolen bicycle and then claims that “someone” on the bus told her son that he was the one who stole the bike and it was at his house and NewBoy could “come and get it if you dare.” She then describes the “someone” and I had the urge to say, “Lady, you just described HALF the kids on my bus!” Instead I smiled and nodded as she continued to be upset about this bike and what this “someone” had said to her son. She tells me they filed a police report and I politely told her that I would do what I could to cooperate with the police in hopes of tracking down NewBoy’s bike. The “someone” in question turned out to be…. You guessed it…. Mini-Mouthboy, who proceeded to tell me HIS side of the story with no prompting. Covering up much?! Mini-Mouthboy also tells me who he THINKS stole the bike. (Everyone still with me?? Anyone confused yet?? Great!! So am I!!!!!)

I later find out that Mini-Mouthboy allegedly made some threats of bodily harm to NewBoy in regards to the stolen bike but due to confidentiality reasons, I cannot tell NewBoy’s parents Mini-Mouthboy’s name, but that NewBoy can point out the boy who threatened him and that I would do what I needed to do by giving the name to the police or the proper authorities.

Long story short, I’ve given Mini-Mouthboy’s name to the police along with his address and his mother’s name. Hopefully this situation won’t get any bigger or more confusing.

In other news, several of my Cherubs are getting on my nerves. Constant back talking and disrespect are things I deal with on a daily basis and it has got to stop!

Riding a Unicycle,

The Bus Driver

Response to Frustrated Mom

2009-01-05T16:58:00.000-08:00

***Disclaimer: What you choose to do with your own children is your own responsibility. I am not a licensed psychologist or a doctor. I can only offer suggestions based on my own experience of what worked with ME as a kid and based on what I understand about peer pressure and the like. The following is not intended to be taken as FACT, but simple suggestions as to how to handle a situation.***

I received a comment on one of my posts, and instead of publishing it there, I’ve decided to respond to it here. Please note that this response is directed specifically towards this parents’ situation and may or may not relate to your specific situation. As always, keeping the children’s best interest at heart is what my job is all about and safety is of utmost concern.

Dear Bus Driver,

I've had many problems with our kids on the bus. I am at a loss as to what to do for punishment at home. We've tried grounding from pretty much everything. Part of the problem is that my daughter wants us to drive her everyday which is just not something we can do.

Do you have any ideas for parents to extend a punishment/discipline at home after they've gotten kicked off the bus?

Thanks,

Frustrated Mom

Dear Frustrated Mom,

Thanks for writing! There are several things that you can do to show a united front to your daughter and other children. (You mentioned multiple children – so this response is meant to cover all the bases.) This is slightly difficult as you are vague as to what your child(ren) did to get kicked off the bus, but that said, here is what I suggest:

1. Talk to the Bus Driver. Ask the bus driver what sorts of things they suggest need to happen to prevent further behavior problems on the bus. (Assigned seats, Games (handheld) to keep child occupied, CD player to keep them occupied… Etc.) The bus driver may also notice bullying issues or anything that may conflict and cause your child(ren) to act out. The ultimate goal is to find a solution that everybody can live with.

2. Talk with your Child(ren). They may have a valid reason for acting out on the bus to get them suspended. Maybe the bus driver is being unsafe, or they are feeling bullied on the bus by another student. It happens quite often. Find out why they are choosing to act out and misbehave without making it feel like they are going to suffer a consequence if they tell you why.

3. Take it to the School. Talk to the principal about your financial/transportation situation and request that an alternative to kicking the student off the bus be put in place. It may not totally stop the behavior but the school can certainly work with you in however you need. *** If the school poses a difficulty, don’t hesitate to take it to the Board of Education in your state***

4. Make them Walk. Sometimes walking can be an effective way of getting the point across that they should not misbehave and get kicked off their only means of transportation to school. Remove that vehicle/personal chauffer option. Obviously safety is paramount, so order some orange reflective vests for your child(ren) to wear while they walk to and from school. I’m sure they’re available in the Sportsman/Hunting section at your local Wal-Mart. *** See Below***

5. Ramp up the Embarrassment. Should the child continue to misbehave even with the “Walking” consequence, increase the embarrassment. Instead of making them walk from home complete with books and bag and whatever else they need, drop them off a half-mile to a mile from school, increasing mileage until they get the point. The embarrassment of their friends seeing the bright orange vest, especially so close to school, may be enough to stop the misbehavior.

6. Wearing the Orange Vest at School. You would need to take a day off of work to accomplish this, but this goes right along with the embarrassment level. Request to attend a day of classes with your child(ren) and make them wear the Orange Vest. Should other kids inquire about it, insist your child explain the reason for wearing the Orange Vest. “I got kicked off the school bus so now I have to walk to school and my mom makes me wear this vest for safety.”

***A few side notes to number 4. Walking IS a wonderful tool. If you live a million miles to school that walking ALL the way to school would be impractical, then make them walk a mile, maybe 2, then pick them up and take them the rest of the way. Follow along in the car and let them know that future violations will result in an increase in the mileage. If there is an unsafe street, obviously do not let them walk on the street. But I would bet the sheer shock value of “You’re going to make me WALK to SCHOOL!?!?!” is enough to get any teenager or young “adult” to shape up and stop misbehaving.

I hope these suggestions will help your situation. Please feel free to comment again and I can address your situation further. Thanks for writing.

Sincerely Yours,

The Bus Driver

Wishing Everyone....

2008-12-24T11:52:00.000-08:00

A happy holiday, merry christmas, happy new year, etc etc. May you and yours have a wonderful holiday break from the insanity of education.

Friday was interesting. After a rocky morning, the afternoon had very little kids on my bus and most of them were just excited about the upcoming break. So, I decided to relax a little and play Christmas music. Until then!!

Snowed In,

The Bus Driver

Happy Holidays!!!

2008-12-20T09:31:00.000-08:00

The last 3 days before vacation were much better. The high school had finals the last three days of the week, so I only ended up hauling 1-3 out of my normal 15-20 group of highschoolers home on the bus. My second group was only my 4th and 5th graders (the kids who ask incessant questions). I do 2 and a half runs in the afternoon to get all my kids home. Because they were exceptionally good for each of the 3 days, I allowed them to talk quietly once we got to the high school.

My 4th and 5th graders are usually expected to stay quiet because of the unnecessary squabbles that my kids typically get into while on the bus. They tend to take neighborhood issues and bring them on the bus creating tension and problems. The problems create unnecessary stress on me so I usually head it off at the beginning and tell them not to bring the issues on the bus and as such, they are not allowed to talk on the bus. They are pretty much a good group of kids, but they DO push buttons and they know exactly which buttons to push. I fear that because I loosened up slightly that it will backfire on me. I understand that they were excited about Christmas.

I have discovered that my highschoolers are my main problem and issue. They act like thugs and are very disrespectful. The last 3 days before vacation have opened my eyes to this especially since I did not have most of them on the bus. The bus had a different atmosphere. I was able to relax a little bit and instead of buying my kids anything for Christmas, I played Christmas music for my younger group of kids and then with my 4th and 5th graders I let them choose their seats (they have assigned seats) and played Christmas music.

The morning route has become interesting though since I have a new alternative student who just started riding. Alternative Girl is a piece of work and has a “cousin” on the bus that is one of my 4th and 5th graders. Well Alternative Girl insisted on talking and breaking the rules, so I asked her to come up front and sit down, she pitched a hissy fit and insisted on getting off at the wrong school and mouthed off to an administrator and mouthed off to me claiming I was only picking on her and not handling the other kids on the bus and that I was lying. She tried to get my other kids involved in it but I was so proud of them when they just stayed quiet and didn’t give her the reaction she was looking for. She told me to let her off the bus “before it gets ugly.” Yeah, I just LOVE threats from students. Her behavior is similar to the behavior of the kids I used to work with 4 years ago and it nearly triggered me into a panic attack. I’ll explain it in another blog. I kept my cool though and just let it roll off my shoulders. The rest of the bus was quiet and once she got off, her “cousin” started in on it and I told her to hush her mouth. She started to smart off at me and I stopped her in her tracks. The cousin was sleeping through most of it until Alternative Girl woke her up. As some of my 4th and 5th graders got off, I kept notes on who I kept having to tell to be quiet and told each of those they were getting a write up. I’ll turn them in after break because I couldn’t get the tape pulled until that afternoon. The sad thing is, if Alternative Girl had just done what I had asked in the first place, she wouldn’t even be getting a write up. The reason that her and her cousin are getting a write up is not for talking and even breaking the rules, but for the disrespect they displayed when riding the bus.

Glad its Christmas Break,

The Bus Driver

Is it Christmas Break yet?

2008-12-16T20:12:00.000-08:00

Three more days left and my kids are pushing me to the limit on the bus. I’m sick and tired of the incessant questions. The answer to most of these questions is a typical flat “No” followed by “Be quiet and sit properly in the seats.” I understand that many of them are anxious for Christmas, heck, I am too but when idiots come out in droves during the holidays, driving becomes a chore and not a pleasure. Combine that with my high school kids acting like thugs and my middleschoolers driving me up a wall and you've got one exasperated bus driver.

I cannot have a back and forth conversation with 15+ children at once because of the idiot who cuts me off, the idiot that tailgates me and the idiots I work with who relentlessly tie up the CB Radio with useless banter, and stupid questions like “Bus Base to Bus D - Do you have Little Johnny on the bus? Bus F to Bus Base - What do I do with Little Amy who cussed me out? We’re still looking for Little Johnny. How do you spell that child’s name? A M Y…. What were the last 2 letters of her name? A M Y….. What I didn’t hear that, you were walked all over by … Little Johnny’s mom says the bus has/hasn’t gone by and Little Johnny has to get home as quickly as possible even though your only 1 road/1 stop/arriving at/or Johnny didn’t get on the bus to go HOME!!! Everybody check to see if Little Johnny got on your bus. School A to Bus Base and Bus D we found Little Johnny.”

If that sounded confusing, that’s what happens DAILY on the bus CB Radio. It’s incessant and annoying and continually blaring in my ear. Some days and weeks are better than others, but there is a time at least once a month where everyone seems to take their stupid pills all at once. I don’t dare mute it or turn it off because its likely the Bus Base will need to get a hold of me the second I do! The “clicks” are from inconsiderate bus drivers who click the radio while people are talking about important things because they have nothing better to do.

In other news, while I was out, I began to get reports of what happened while I was gone. A fellow bus driver’s 8-year-old son had one of my high school boys use a belt on him. Another bus driver ran into a telephone pole, and then claimed she couldn’t see it. To make matters worse, she didn’t report it to the proper authorities, and the only way the bus shop knew about it was because a parent told ME when I came back what had happened. I had noticed the stop sign leaning/crushed into the pole and had wondered what happened. That same bus driver cannot seem to follow directions and cannot handle a bus at all. Just today she reportedly let a busload of kids off along a busy highway/street with no regards to safety. Those kids were seen walking along the side of the road and were called in by a concerned motorist. She’s going to get a child killed if my boss doesn’t grow a pair and fire her for her irresponsible behavior.

I have kids on the bus this year who are expecting me to do something nice for Christmas (bags of candy and such) but my bus has had some very poor behavior that none of the kids deserve ANYTHING. Every time I’ve tried to implement some form of reward, they take advantage of it and it usually lands me more frustrated than when I started. So many kids on my bus have come to expect that the bus driver will be nice and hand out candy canes or something. The truth is, if the kids ask every day, then continually break the rules, cause a problem or otherwise get on my nerves, I’m sure as heck NOT going to spend MY paycheck on stuff for them. Sorry, not happening! I know I sound like a humbug, but I’m fed up with it!

I made a huge decision this week after much deliberation. I took this route on the condition that it would be a pay increase for me. We currently get a base salary and then have mileage added onto that at 15 cents a mile. As a floater (someone who bounces from bus to bus as a full time, full benefit substitute), I would get 52 miles a day in addition to my base pay. I was told that this bus was 81 miles a day, a definite increase. When I inherited the bus, the original driver left me with nothing. No names of the kids, no addresses, no emergency contacts for the kids, absolutely NOTHING. It took me nearly a month to acquire all this information from the kids, begging and pleading on my knees for them to bring back the student information sheets, tedious hours putting it all in a spreadsheet for easy organization, the works! It occurred to me that the mileage might be inaccurate, so I re-did the mileage and came out with 52 miles.

This mileage began AT the bus shop, and ended AT the bus shop, with no “in-between” runs. In-between runs such as Middays, Field trips, and other runs were not counted. We are technically supposed to do mileage from our first stop in the morning to our last drop off in the morning, then from our first pick up in the afternoon to our last stop in the afternoon. If I had done it that way, then the mileage would be even less, because during the morning and afternoon run, I have approximately 8 miles that are “empty bus” miles. 2 miles to my first stop in the morning, 2 miles back to the bus shop in the morning, 2 miles to my first pick up in the afternoon, 2 miles back to the bus shop at the end of the day after my last stop. In actuality, the bus should only be approximately 44 miles, and I should be LOSING money from mileage. Because of this actuality, and that we have a new computerized mileage system (so drivers can’t lie and pad their paychecks with false miles) I have decided to give up the route and become a “floater” again.

I discussed this with my boss today and he is fully supportive, however I do feel bad for the kids. They don’t deserve to be bounced either. At this point, I have got to do what is best for me. This job is my only source of income at this point, and I’ve got to look out for myself.

Conflicted and Exhausted,

The Bus Driver

Christmas Madness and Insanity

2008-12-12T18:11:00.000-08:00

Well, I have definitely neglected this blog since Thanksgiving, but my schedule has just been filled with insanity.

First, I traveled up to Indiana to testify in a court case (guilty!), then returned to a myriad of doctor appointments and random field trips that take up most of my weekend time. I also babysit for a friend of mine on the nights she goes to work her second job until her husband comes home (approx 1 hr or so) so that has been keeping me very busy. So, that being said, I simply haven't had time to sit at the computer all that much and catch up on my regular blog reads.

The doctor appointments were successful in that both doctors (a foot doctor and an ear, nose, throat doctor) identified reasons for my suffering. (I have constant foot pain and sinus infections.) Turns out, I have heel spurs on both feet, with one being worse than the other. Luckily we caught the heel spurs early enough for proper intervention to fix the problem. I'll be getting custom made orthotics and I'm in a foot brace during the day (till the orthotics come in) and a night splint at night. My sinus problems are being caused by my adenoids, so they possibly have to come out. Yay me.

On to more recent events. Today I drove a group of 4th graders to a local television station. The kids got a tour of the station which included the weather "green screen" and got to meet the various anchors of the news. I stayed outside with the bus, but soon needed to seek a bathroom. I caught the noon news just as it began to air. The kids still hadn't come out from their studio tour, so I figured they were probably behaving so well, that the studio had allowed them to watch the taping of the news. At the last 3 minutes of the news, the studio flashed the kids on the screen and they got to wave and say goodbye. The news anchor voiced over the picture and said "S Elementary from W. County, State is visiting us in studio today!! Wave goodbye kids!!" It was way cool considering that they don't typically do that with school groups. The teacher said that they were very well behaved so they earned that treat. The kids were so excited when they got back on the bus, and it was so unexpected that noone thought to record the news. I hope they are able to get a copy from the station or that someone's parent recorded the news.

Speaking of news, Alternative Boy got arrested at school for possession of Cocaine. He hasn't been on the bus since, but I've seen him wandering the neighborhood. I suspect he's been expelled or suspended from school.

Pipsqueak badly needs a seatbelt. For the life of me I cannot get that child to sit still in his seat. I have removed his backpack from him since he tends to go inside his backpack, then when its time for him to get off the bus, all of his stuff is falling out of his arms as he wanders up the aisle.

My middleschool kids are learning the hard way that I mean business. In the mornings, with the exception of 2-3 kids, I tell them what seat to sit in as they get on the bus. In the afternoons, with the exception of a handful of kids, I also tell them where to sit, though its slightly more difficult because I need my trouble makers up front and still have my little ones on the bus at the time.

I'm now having trouble out of my highschool group who has decided to take advantage of me. I'm beginning to think they need assigned seats as well. My second run is the worst as far as behavior problems go because my 4th and 5th graders like to talk back to me. I can't wait for Christmas.

The Wheels on the Bus......

The Bus Driver

High-Life Adventure and Thanksgiving

2008-11-27T08:44:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving to all who read my blog. May your day be filled with turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, and all that comes with a delicious turkey dinner.

Now, on to the Overnight Trip.

I drove the High School FBLA members to their Fall Leadership Conference. The drive took approximately 5 hours one-way including stops for food and restroom breaks. When we arrived in the city where the Conference was being held, I navigated the 40-foot bus through the most narrow streets and places. It’s a wonder that I didn’t damage a mirror or any of the bus by pulling through some of the spots. I did end up taking out quite a few curbsides, but its better to hit the curb than to hit a vehicle.

We pulled into the hotel parking lot and unloaded the bus in the hopes our rooms were ready. The rooms were not ready yet, but the hotel graciously stored our luggage so we didn’t have to haul it from where the bus would later be parked. We stayed at the Hilton Garden Inn, right across the street from the Conference Center. This Hilton offered a Dinner Grill and Room Service that included food made to order. The Breakfast Buffet was better than your standard continental breakfast and included eggs and omelets made to order as well as a large bar of fresh produce, cereal, and other standard items you would find in a continental breakfast. The prices for dinner were reasonable and breakfast was a standard $10.95 charge for the custom made plates. A large fitness center and swimming pool (puddle) were also available for guest convenience. The lobby contained a full service bar and near the guest check-in desk was a small pantry with a myriad of items available (for a price of course) to the weary traveler.

The hotel was located in the center of downtown with easy walking distance access to restaurants and stores. After we unloaded the bus, I was given vague instructions on where to park the monster. I circled the block once and found a very nice security guard lady who told me where to go. I was under the impression that we would be parking underneath the Convention Center and that when I would take the elevator, it would bring me directly up into the Convention building itself. I was also given the impression that it was a very large parking area, well marked and well lit. I eventually found the parking lot and paid 20 dollars (provided by the trip coordinator) for two days worth of parking. I swing the bus around and find the parking garage is pretty well packed with other buses and no one directing traffic. I managed to squeeze my bus between the brick wall (taking out the curbside) and another bus. I literally had approximately 5 inches of space available on either side. I figured if there were no space underneath the garage, I’d circle the block and come back for another pass. I get in the garage and there is very limited space, I pull over to evaluate the situation and find out that my rear-end is blocking one of the inner garage exit points. I decided that its probably not a good idea for me to keep on blocking an exit point and rather than risk a ticket, I pulled forward. I found a pretty decent parking space further down the line.

Now I had to find out where the elevator was. I saw some FBLA students from another county walking past my bus, and figured they knew where this fabled elevator was. I shut and locked my bus and walked in the direction they went. I found there was no elevator in that vicinity and ended up walking up the hill to figure out where I was. I saw a building and made my way towards it. I found the fabled elevator inside, only this elevator was not warm and cozy as I had expected, but it was a random elevator within a cold parking garage. About halfway up the hill, I realized I had forgotten my jacket, but since I didn’t want to hike back down the hill and back up again, I decided to keep on trucking. When I got inside the elevator, I rode it down and figured out where the elevator was located in relation to my bus. Then I rode it up to street level and walked the rest of the half-mile to the hotel in a short sleeve shirt in 35-degree weather.

I begged the concierge to let me get my sweatshirt out of my backpack that was stored with the rest of the luggage from the group. He graciously allowed me to do so. I then set in search of lunch. I found this quaint Japanese Sushi place just across the street from the hotel. After a meal of Sushi, I wandered back to the hotel in hopes that we would be checked into our rooms shortly. My friend from 7 years back was on her way to visit me at the hotel and I was hoping we wouldn’t have to visit in the lobby, but in the privacy of a hotel room. I got back just in time to pick up my luggage, room key, and I found my room. I got lucky and did not share a room with anybody else. In overnight trips, one may be expected to share with the kids, a chaperone, or be placed in an individual room. My room had a king size (very comfortable) bed, a mahogany desk, and a beautiful HD 30+ inch flat screen TV. (Yes!!! High-life here I come!!!) My friend made it and we visited and reminisced, then she left and I went in search of the pool and dinner. I discovered the pool was nothing more than a 3-foot deep puddle approximately the size of a 20 by 10 foot bedroom. Having nixed the pool idea, I ate dinner in the hotel lobby after contemplating whether or not to order room service. I slept on the most comfortable bed known to man!

The next day, I had to leave the high-life of a custom made omelet and retrieve the bus from the cold parking garage. Not wanting a repeat performance of yesterday’s parking garage fiasco, I inquired at the front desk about a shuttle to the lower parking garage. They graciously obliged and I retrieved the bus after a short panic worrying if it had been towed. We then toured around town and saw some of the historical sites. We went to the mall where we had a close call with a motorist (I can’t say much here for fear of being identified), and then drove down “frat house lane” on the college campus before we headed back to town. On the way back, we got stuck behind “Pokey Pappy” (the traditional old guy in a truck that refuses to speed or go the speed limit) for a while, but eventually made it back in one piece.

My next adventure takes me on a personal trip to Indiana where I have to testify in a court case Dec 1-3. Be watching for updates regarding that adventure.

Adventured Out!

The Bus Driver

i promise...

2008-11-26T01:14:00.000-08:00

I havent forgotten the blog. I've been procrastinating writing lately. We are on thanksgiving break, and yeah.. excuses excuses. I will have a new blog for perusal and approval by the end of today.

The Note and Pipsqueak

2008-11-20T19:40:00.000-08:00

The other day, I get this note from my 4th and 5th grade kids:

Dear Mrs. Bus Driver,

We all know you want us quiet, but you shouldn’t be so hard on us. We are just kids! Please, Please, just give us a reasonable and understanding talk with us.

By,
All of 4th and 5th grade

I guess my being strict is having an effect on them. They’re in that stage where they are trying to get on my nerves and push the rules. I’m not budging on the rules. They know where I stand on the rules and I am not unreasonable in my demands. It’s because of their behavior that I cannot play the radio. They cannot respect even the smallest treat and I find it really sad because I would love to be able to have fun and joke around with them, but if I am not strict enough they will walk all over me. I just don’t know how to give them the incentive to do what I want them to do without bribing them. The kids on my first round are still having issues. Its time for another talk once the break is over. I am starting to get them warmed up to me though. It’s just a matter of keeping them under control. Some of my older babies made the honor roll and the paper listed their names. I’m so proud of them!

Speaking of little ones, I have a pre-k baby (Pipsqueak) that insisted on singing very LOUDLY for the whole bus to hear, and it kept cracking me up as well as all my middle schoolers who thought he was so adorable. Pipsqueak is aptly named, as his book bag is as big as HE is. He has been a true challenge, as is with any 4-year-old, he tends to stand up and play in the seat. We are working on his behavior in that regard. He is also cute when he gets off the bus, if he sees a car coming he WILL NOT enter the road until someone comes and gets him off the bus.

Alternative boy is now riding the bus again, God help me!

I’ll be leaving this Friday and coming back Saturday. I have an overnight field trip, which I hope will provide a wonderful anecdote or two for everyone.

Ready For A Vacation!

The Bus Driver

Nature, Fall, Alpacas, and the Mysterious Bead Thrower

2008-11-17T20:39:00.001-08:00

On Friday, I took the pre-k on a field trip to a nature trail and then to an Alpaca farm. They went looking for Fall and Nature. Both went missing sometime on Thursday night. I am proud to say that the pre-k had successfully located both Fall and Nature somewhere along the trail. Leaves were taken as evidence, and gumshoes gathered mud and sand on the ground. The alpacas were cute. Did you know that male alpacas are the only ones that spit? Most of the pre-k kids were more interested in the friendly Dachshund and Jack Russell Terrier dogs that were permanent residents of the farm. Note to Self: Purchase wet wipes to be kept handy on the bus.

In other news, my cherubs and I had a wonderful “talk” on Friday afternoon. Though it was more like a cross between yelling and shouting. They had pushed me to the edge and I had enough. While waiting for the middle school to let out, I stood for about 5 minutes and lectured my pre-k through 3rd graders on their increasingly poor behavior on what was once a well-behaved bus. As I continued on my loud, commanding rant, a lot of the kids began to sit upright in the seat with their eyes wide as I continued to demand they sit down, sit back, and behave by not talking. I expounded that I’m repeating myself DAILY and should NOT have to do this. I gave them ALL a warning that should they decide to disobey, I WILL be speaking to their parents and failing that, they WILL be getting a write up. As my middle schoolers got on the bus, I lectured them and stopped them in their tracks. I made them sit where I decided. You could have heard a pin drop for the rest of the route.

Mysterious Bead Thrower threw a bead at another student, but it hit me instead. When I pulled the tape, I did not see who threw the bead on the tape, so until something else happens, the Bead Thrower will remain a mystery. I had a question from a parent who had been told by her son that I accused him of throwing a bead. I explained to her that I pulled the tape and that nothing was shown directly indicating him throwing the bead, but he was sitting in close proximity to the bead thrower and very well could have been the bead thrower as he was being his usual Goofy boy self. However since both boys questioned in the incident have not fessed up, Bead Thrower will remain a mystery.

Today, the behavior was much better, however I still came down hard on the kids and will not let up until they know I mean business.

Frustrated,

The Bus Driver

Mini-Mouthboy’s Great Improvement and Other Items

2008-11-12T14:20:00.000-08:00

After speaking with the school administrator about Mini-Mouthboy, and speaking with the bus driver that transports him in the morning times, I have seen a HUGE improvement in his behavior. The child that was back talking me now does what he is supposed to do, he sits in his seat and he does not cause a disruption anymore. I’m hoping this marked improvement continues to be the norm for him.

What really helped him is the responsibility of seating my Pre-K students as they got on the bus. Since he was the oldest child and the closest to the front, I asked him if he would be willing to take on that responsibility. He has risen to the challenge. I’ve also told him if he continues to do well in his current seat that I would be more than willing to move him back further in the bus should his behavior continue to show me he can handle it. He is a sweet child and I always make sure to point out that he had excellent behavior on the bus before he gets off every day.

Hyperboy is another one of my regular front seaters. Since he cannot seem to sit still and the only speed he moves at is a run, he has earned himself a front seat. Again, he is not a bad kid, just very hyper. He sits next to Blue-Eyegirl who also cannot seem to stay seated and insists on standing on the seat most days where I have to tell her repeatedly to stop and sit down. I think firm consistency, expectations, and staying calm are the keys to getting these children to behave the way I want them to behave. Calm bus driver = Calm students.

I have worked on finalizing my assigned seats for my younger kids, and now I have to tackle my middle schoolers. Hopefully by the end of the week I will have finalized their seating arrangement as well. From there I need to tackle the second half of my route with my 4th and 5th graders earning assigned seats. I need bigger index cards, but hopefully once I get everything arranged I can go through and record where I have everybody seated, get the large index cards, and re-do my names and numbers on each seat so I don’t have a million index cards taped to the sides of my bus.

Finding Normalcy,

The Bus Driver